New Skills and Change?

“The future is predetermined by the character of those who shape it.”?– Davos (Stargate Atlantis)

I recently heard a person reflect on parenthood that resonates with me. He said in the whole process of raising your kids, you need to learn new skills. The skills needed to change a diaper are not the skills needed to teach children the next steps in growing up. For example, we need to learn how to change a child’s diaper quickly and efficiently. This leads to a new skill on how to teach them to go to the bathroom on their own. Once they have mastered that, our newest learned skill is no longer needed and we continue to learn different ones.

Consider what we have experienced in the past several years. How many of us had to learn new skills in the COVID-19 pandemic?

I believe there are two forces at play here.

1.????Personal Immunity to Change

“The only people who like change are those who want us to change.” – Arnie Wohlgemut

Change creates fear and fear can paralyze you. The resulting resistance is a result of our psychological dynamic equilibrium being disrupted and appears like a personal immunity to change, write Robert Kegan and Lisa Lahey.

Even though the only thing constant in our world is change, we still are naturally fearful of the unknown. It is change that often pushes us out of the current comfort zone, even if the current situation is unpleasant.

I encourage you to reflect on your current situation that might be a comfort zone, that is limiting your potential.

2.????Competing Commitments

“Draw from your past, but do not let your past draw from you.” – Master Bra’tac (Stargate SG-1)

In life we resist moving forward because we have finally mastered whatever we needed to survive.

Sometimes change asks people to call into question beliefs they have long-held close to, perhaps since childhood.

We look at life through our lenses of experiences and learned biases. We then live out that knowledge whether they are true and beneficial. I encourage you to examine your experience and biases to determine if they are true and have help you reach your dream.

As always, my advice may only speak to the surface of your situation. Advice seldom goes deeper. It remains your challenge and opportunity to go deeper and improve your life.

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Arnie Wohlgemut is the Senior Consultant and President of KP Mylene & Associates #BuildingtoLead, a leadership development and facilities management consulting company. He is passionate about supporting new or emerging leaders with unique and exciting resources that inspire them to reach their potential.