A new perspective when plans suddenly change

Here's what I know for sure... when my plans, my ways, my agenda, or my preferences suddenly change, I get annoyed. It's usually the first thought that comes to mind. To be honest, "annoyed" is stating it mildly. I actually get demanding, rude... and sometimes act like a little kid whose parents enforced a bedtime that was counter to his plans, ways, agenda, or preferences. As adults I think we react with bad behavior all the time when our plans get changed. From the long sigh, to the snippy responses towards the innocent customer support person (and everything in between) our outward reaction especially towards others can trigger a chain reaction that sets the course for the rest of your day.

But truth be told, it IS annoying. Let's not pretend that it's not. For me, the lesson was not measuring how annoying the change of plans were, it was how to I train my mind to react when sudden change happens... cuz, its gonna happen.

Getting slapped in the face with a new perspective

Last week, I was informed that the property next to mine was available for purchase. It had been in escrow for a while and I let the landowner know a while back that if anything changed, I'd like to know so I could put up a backup offer. He had sent me an email the night before, and I was excited to explore it and get my thoughts around all the potential. The next day, I had this small window of time in my calendar that was packed pretty tight with meetings, phone calls, and planning sessions that required my attention. I had it all mapped out and knew my margins to see what I needed to see, before I had to leave to get where I needed to be.

When I arrived at our home, my son happened to be there, and I invited him to join me and drive our John Deere gator through the acreage so I could capture some pictures. We jumped in and as he backed out of our courtyard I heard this crazy sound above the diesel rumble of the gator. I stopped him and said, "Whoa, do you hear that?" We looked up at the canopy of trees above the driveway and saw this crazy rustling (like in Jurassic Park right before some crazy dinosaur descends on its prey) and witnessed a massive old growth Oak tree fall to the ground. It was terrifying and epic at the same time. We both stood their mouths wide open and thought, "Are you freaking kidding me?" (Note: the picture above is the actual tree that covered our road).

We drove down to survey the damage and noticed other good-size trees leveled underneath the weight of this Oak. The branches alone were the size of regular trees and the trunk was massive. In the middle of our observation my mind raced to "how am I gonna get out of here?... this has literally blocked our road... I've got a coffee meeting in 25 minutes."

I look at my son and say, "we're trapped... we're going to have to cut our way out of here." At which he said, "Dad... we were just seconds away from this falling on us!"

The stark contrast of my agenda being suddenly changed to the near-death experience of being "seconds away" from serious injury or death was like getting slapped in the face with a new perspective. My focus went from my schedule, to my son's perspective of escaping calamity.

This wasn't just ironic, it was worth paying attention to.

The moment gave me pause. I remember standing with my son and saying, "my perspective needs to move to gratitude." He looked at me and said, "yeah, me too. This could've been a completely different story."

During the next four hours of cutting and carving enough of a tunnel for our cars to drive underneath, I pondered what could have been, and was overwhelmed with gratitude.

Here's what I know: In life, things change. It's bound to happen. The world and all its parts don't revolve around me (as much as I'd like it to). My agenda, my plans, my ways, my preferences, and my schedule ARE important... but they are not the end all. Things can (and will) suddenly change. When they do, I believe it's ok to have an immediate reaction, it's only human. But can I eventually move towards gratitude? Can I see that sometimes things change for the better... (and sometimes they don't) but that it's going to be alright?

We have so much more to be grateful for, than to be annoyed at in this life.

So when your meeting gets moved, or your flight gets delayed, the traffic holds you up, the rain stops your outdoor activity, or the Oak tree blocks your driveway... its ok to emotionally react and to feel what you feel; but the challenge is find an eventual place where you can pause, breath, and move towards gratitude.

Then reschedule. Life goes on... and it's worth enjoying.