New Hire Remorse: What It Is & How to Avoid It

Ever heard of "New Hire Remorse" ?

Simply put, it's that feeling of dread and regret after accepting a new job.

It can happen for a lot of reasons - one being that the job was mis-represented and the other, that the candidate accepted an offer for a job that was not aligned, meaning it wasn't a match with who they are, their values, their strengths, and their season of life.

While this feeling has always existed, the past couple of years have magnified this with a perfect storm of layoffs, economic and political unrest, and perhaps the one silver lining - a new level of personal awareness and empowerment around what we expect from our careers (simply clocking in to a 9-5 is no longer an option for many who took part in #TheGreatResignation). This has resulted in a mass corporate exodus followed by the contraction of reality, with those in new jobs wondering:

Did I make a mistake by changing jobs/careers?

Should I have ever left my last job at all?

How long do I give this job? How soon is too soon to quit?

The good news is that there are ways to prevent new hire remorse - to have a better understanding of the job, no matter how it is presented AND be sure that the job you're saying yes to is actually a fit for you right now.

I was quoted on this topic in this recent Business Insider article , and will expound upon those thoughts below.

(1) Do the introspective work ahead of time - before there is an offer on the table! - to determine what you need and desire in this next role.

This might sound obvious, but what I've noticed (and what is understandable in today's market) is:

• Many of us haven't actually taken the time to consider what we want - out of our jobs, careers, and lives since we were 18 and choosing a college major
• Furthermore, who we are, what we value, and what we want out of life has changed significantly in the last two years. Even our personalities and brain chemistry have been affected . Simply put, the job that was a perfect fit in January 2020 might be a terrible fit right now.
• In addition to these factors,

The economy and political environment create a lot of fear in even the most confident job seekers. When candidates are in a desperate place, they tend to apply to jobs they don't want, and accept roles that they'll soon grow to resent.

(2) Do your research - and go beyond what you'll find on the Internet.

While beginning your research with a good old fashioned Google search, review of the latest "Top Companies" list , or perusal of Glassdoor's reviews , is a great start - that should just be the beginning.

I recommend leveraging low-pressure, informal networking conversations with connections at your ideal companies to get a more authentic view of the company from the inside. The difference between having these honest talks at this point in the process is that because there's not a job at hand, both parties tend to show up more as their real selves - versus the "best" or "most appropriate" version that can show up in interviews and skew answers and information gleaned.

Ask open-ended questions like the following to get started:

• What's your favorite part of working there?
• Why did you join?
• Why do you stay?
• What could be better?

(3) Manage Your Interview Mindset

Landing a new job is a big decision and major life event. And the sheer momentum and feelings of excitement (and all the other emotions) involved in the job search can make us forget that we are in control, that we are interviewing the company too.

In addition to preparing and presenting your best self, take note of the workplace environment and overall attitude and "feel" of the group. Imagine yourself working with these people (both virtually and in-person for jobs that aren't fully remote). Ask questions to understand how your potential role will work with others in the organization, how it ties to department and company goals, and if the culture feels like a fit.

Here are some questions to ask to get a feel for culture without directly asking.

• What makes someone successful in this role/department/company?
• What makes someone not so successful?
• How do you celebrate success?
• How do you handle failure?

One final thought: If after all this forethought, research, and due diligence, you still land in a job that leaves you feeling new hire remorse, please remember: It's not your fault and you don't have to stay there. Few career moves are irreversible. Life - and your career - is a journey. Allow this experience to provide you with information to make a more aligned choice next time.

?? Your Turn: Have you ever heard of, or experienced, new hire remorse?

p.s. When you're ready, here are a couple ways I can support you in finding fulfilling, aligned work:

• Get my free LinkedIn tips to land the job
• Join us in my signature job search + career happiness program
• Book a call with me to discuss 1:1 executive coaching