Never Be Shy About 4 Things

I’ve come across a wise saying numerous places, and I love it.

“Never be shy at 4 things:

1. Old clothes, they don’t define your talent.

2. Poor friends, there is no status in relationship.

3. Old parents, you are what you are today because of them.

4. Simple living, success can’t be judged by appearance.”

I found this information so vital that I felt it (or at least its premise) deserved an entire article dedicated to it. So let’s unpack that sage advice, shall we?

Don’t Let Clothes or Outer Appearance Define You

We have all heard the expression “Clothes make the man,” but few know where this sentiment originated. Historians have traced its lineage back to 1500 within the works of Erasmus, the famed Catholic priest, theologian, and social critic. Between now and then, many poets, writers, and philosophers have offered up their own unique variations, including good old Bill Shakespeare, who spoke these words (via his character Polonius) in 1600 during the first showing of Hamlet: “The apparel oft proclaims the man!”

I am going to one-up Shakespeare here and wildly disagree with this aesthetic-centric saying, opting instead to throw my full support to our anonymous pen behind the saying that first spurred this article. While as a businessman, I understand the importance of looking professional and dressing appropriately, especially in the workplace. The rub lies in deriving worth and value from a collection of sewn together threads (no matter how nicely they are put together).

The way I think of this is that clothes are a necessary—and lovely—accessory. Clothes are not who you are—and they do not determine your skills.

There is No Status in Relationship

Directly following the encouragement to not derive our worth or identity from clothing or exterior frills comes the second truth: a warning to not fall into the trap of getting your worth in your relationships. The saying specifically points to poor friends and how we should not shy away from embracing them just as we would our richest acquaintance.

We could take so many lessons from this, but the one that strikes me personally is that—on a human level—whether rich or poor, we are all equal and should extend our love and care equally, regardless of a person’s financial status. Bottom line: Fear of “falling” socially should never prevent us from providing comfort and friendship. Nor should a misguided desire to climb a social ladder compel us to aim at hobnobbing with an upper echelon of acquaintances.

Your Parents Deserve Respect, and Much More

Let’s be real. Your parents (literally) made you. For many of us, our parents raised us and gave, gave, and gave as we grew. So, in my estimate, this means that they are owed much. But since I don’t really like the connotation associated with the word “owe,” I would like to suggest a substitution of “worthy of” instead. Our parents are worthy of our respect and kindness (no matter how old they are!)

And while I am taking license at interpretation, I would extend this sentiment to include all elders of the generation(s) that have gone before ours. These pioneers forged brand new frontiers, paved roads where there was no clear path, and worked hard to afford us opportunities and better lives because of their labor. Now, as we reap the benefits, we should honor them. When tempted to underestimate these “old-timers,” remember: with wisdom comes age, and the world could use all the wisdom it can get in these unprecedented times.

Seek the Simple Life

Success, just like love, beauty, and happiness, is such a subjective ideal. Far too often, the world attributes success to attaining some specific goal in the business realm, even amassing flashy and impressive material things. But the truth is that success, precisely because of its subjective nature, can only be determined and defined by you.

This is excellent news. Why? Because it places the power right in your hands. You define what success looks like and means in your life. The quote alerts you to this life-changing awareness, then offers the sage advice to keep it simple (hint: it won’t be found in the number of material things you have or zeros in your bank account balance).