Never Forget - I Want to Do My Part

As we approach the 20th anniversary of 9/11, emotions run deep. As most, everyone recalls where they were during that time. I am no different. For those who may not know my personal story, I feel it necessary to share a note from that time. It's surreal to relive that moment, but important to never forget. Below is my account, which I wrote 2 days after the event, and have kept in an archive since. My original intent of the note was to journal my experience while it was fresh, but it turned into a major contributor to my healing. This note subsequently resulted in thousands of well-wishing emails and calls at the time from strangers, which truly allowed me to heal. For which, to this day I am eternally grateful. The world is in a very precarious place today (better or worst is in the eye of the beholder), but one thing is for sure...

Let us never forget September 11, 2001!

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Testimony

This is my way of trying to wrap my mind around what happened. Like everyone understanding what happened & why on Tuesday is very difficult to conceive. I thank everyone who called and prayed for me during and after. I can truly say that it is a blessing that I am able to write this and be here to talk about it. I know that there are a good number of people who survived, but magnitudes more who perished, and that's what makes it even more difficult to accept. It can almost be guaranteed that we all know someone who has yet to be heard from or identified. My prayers and blessings go out.

I started Tuesday as a normal traveling day for me, where I go to my NY office in 2 WTC on the 93rd floor. The view of my office is SE, facing the Brooklyn bridge. I arrived at 8:15 in my office. I was doing some work before I went to a meeting scheduled at 9:30 uptown. About 8:40, I went to go to the bathroom. The bathroom, located in the center of the floor has a coded lock. I punched the code; the same code I always used and it wouldn't open the door. I literally tried to push the door open figuring something was wrong with the door. I then looked over at the receptionist for the floor, who was about 30+ yards away from me. Behind her through the glass I could see tons of paper floating around as if it were a ticker-taped parade. The first thought in my mind is how did garbage get so high. At the same time I heard right behind me, people running down the emergency exit stairs and screaming "hurry up, lets get out of here" to each other. At that time I started to get a scent of smoke. At that instant, I ran full sprint back to my office, put my laptop in my bag and thru it over my shoulder. I saw a couple of people on the floor looking around and asking questions, and I told them what I saw and heard by the bathroom. One person pointed out to us the black smoke they could see from the corner of the window. At that moment we all left and stood by the elevators/stairs for about a second. Someone asked, "are the elevators working?" One response was "you shouldn't take the elevator in an emergency." As that comment was made I was already walking towards the stairs. I walked down the stairs along with a lot of people from the floors above. The stairs were crowded, but people were moving, not really knowing what was going on. When we got to the 78th floor the stairs came to an end and let everyone out onto the lobby. The 78th floor is a lobby with express elevators to the 1st floor and banks of elevators serving 78 to 93. Once I got out on the 78th lobby, an announcement over the PA said, " We know what happened. A plane crashed into building 1. Building 2 is OK. Please go back to your offices or stay where you are and stay calm." There turned out to be different groups of people at that point, some stayed in the lobby looking out of the window at building 1 others continued down the stairs. I was standing right in front of an express elevator when the announcement was made. Confused and scared, as the door closed I jumped in at the last second with no one to follow. The elevator went down half full w/ maybe 10-15 people on board. When we got to the 1st floor, I could see outside on the street, Liberty and West St. covered with debris. As everyone on the floor at that time was running and being escorted towards the exit, we were being crossed by policemen going in. I went up a set of escalators that would have led me to the exit in front of Century 21. About 20 or so feet from getting to the exit, debris began falling from the sky. People who were already in the street were trying to come back. Others tried to cross. From where I was standing in all directions all I could see is debris coming from the sky. I, with everyone around went back down the escalators and out another exit. When I finally got outside, I was standing on the corner of the Millennium Hotel looking at the towers in disbelief w/ everyone else. As I tried to make calls on my cell phone, but was unable to, some people witnessed victims jumping from the buildings. I looked up briefly, instinctively, but turned away, because I could not bare to watch. So I decided to walk away, and as I walked away there were pools of blood and clothes all over the street. At this point I am walking dazed and confused. I know the streets of NY very well, but I felt lost with nowhere to go. I was alone and had no way of communicating to anyone that I was alright. I tried to use a payphone by City hall, which didn't work. I eventually walked to Duane and Broadway, where a Van had the radio on. Others and I listened in disbelief as they described that a 767 crashed into the buildings. As I was listening, right before my eyes building 2 collapsed. I stood and watched in shock, until others and I realized that a cloud of smoke was heading in our direction. At that point I turned and ran as fast as I could until I got to Canal St. where I couldn't run anymore. I, and everyone around just walked. The streets were filled with people walking aimlessly, but away from the tragedy. I stopped at a CVS in the village and bought a walkman so I could listen to the news. After that I walked for about 5-6 miles in circles, eventually ending uptown at a friends house on W61st.

It is only after looking at the news that I can appreciate, but not understand what I went through. It was only 18 minutes between plane crashes. I don't know how I was able to get from the 93rd to the 1st before the plane hit. I also realize, if I actually got into the bathroom I might not have made it at all.

I feel a lot of pain for the people who couldn't make it out. I know for a fact that one of my saving graces was me getting on that elevator. The plane crash was not long after I got on the ground floor, so the people who took the stairs, and stayed on the lobby....

I am very blessed as well as the others, who made it out, but what dominates my mind night and day is not material things lost, or even making it out w/o a scratch, but the suffering the families of all the people who didn't make it out are going through. I can only hold on to my faith and believe that everything happens for a reason and GOD wanted me to make it for a reason. I can only go through life now maximizing all opportunities and not taking anything for granted.

GOD BLESS!!!!!!!!!!!

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Patrick Duroseau