Networking Summary

There are a lot of articles and advice on what to do and how to position yourself when networking. Here is a summary I made basing on information available from various open sources.

Networking tips

Do your homework.

Find out who is going to be at any events you attend and do your research. Are these going to be the kinds of people you want as contacts? Make sure you go into the event with a goal.  For example, three five minute conversations with people you don't know.

If possible, do some background research, such as getting a list of attendees so you know who’s coming and how you might help them.

 Go it alone.

When attending networking functions, go by yourself or at least communicate to your carpool buddies that you should all fan out.  Moving about a networking event solo encourages people to approach you and makes it easy to mingle and initiate conversations.  It may be more comfortable to have a friend right there with you, but remember: you are there to grow your network, not hang with the people already in your network.  

 Position.

 Hang out at the food table.  

People tend to be easily accessible around food.  As people check out the buffet table, small talk comes more easily. "That Danish looks good..." is as good an opener as any.  Once they have their hands full, people often look for a flat surface where they can place their plate and beverage.  Take a spot next to them and get to chatting.

Check this out.  Our endorphin levels are higher when we are close to food, which boosts our memory and the chance that we will remember and be remembered.  We humans are a trip, aren’t we?

Or find the bar! Whether or not you’re drinking, it’s always a great idea to position yourself at the edge of the bar. Many people run for the bar when they get to a networking event in order to get a short respite from an overwhelming entrance. If you position yourself a few steps from the bar, you can easily strike up a conversation as people turn with drink in hand.

 Stand near the registration table.  

After you have registered and put on your nametag, take advantage of the many opportunities to make small talk with new arrivals after they have signed in. These are the couple of minutes when most people are alone and interested in someone new to communicate with.  Even something really easygoing like, "Looks like a good turnout..." is probably good enough to get a friendly conversation started.  Remember that like you, people are there to make new contacts.  And if they are not, they are in the wrong place.  

Study the tags.
If nametags are pre-printed and on display at the registration table, scan the tags of the other attendees to see what opportunities await you. 

Circle and scan. 
Before diving into the event, try circling the room and checking out the nametags for people or companies you definitely want to make contact with while there.  

Look for people standing alone.
These folks may be nervous, and your initiative will often endear you to them.  Plus, one-on-one networking is the best networking.  It is hard to join a group unless invited.  
 
Sit between people you do not know well.
If the event is a sit-down affair, do not sit by a friend or business associate.  You already know that person!  You might be sitting there a while, so make sure you are going to be sitting by someone you can form a new relationship with.  Plan who you want to sit by, but wait until the last minute to actually sit down so you can keep making new contacts.

Set reasonable expectations. When attending an event, understand what you are there to do. Is your goal to feel out a new organization and get to know the vibe? Is it to meet five new people? Is it to meet one or two specific people? These are all reasonable expectations and it takes a little pre-planning to set these goals.

Don’t spread yourself too thin. Start by spreading a large net to test out a handful of organizations and then commit yourself to a only a few as time goes on. You want to become a staple at these events. When you bounce around to too many events where no one knows you, you’re doing yourself a disservice by having to build your brand from scratch in each environment. You’ll also find that networking is a lot more fun when you become a regular. People will sing your praises to new attendees (this is always better than you doing it yourself) and you’ll see lots of familiar faces.

Take notes. When you ask for someone’s card after having a great conversation, take notes on their business card after they walk away or immediately after the event. This will help you to be more specific in your follow-up.

Introduce yourself to the organizer. A great way to get to know more about an organization and who is involved is to seek out the event organizer and introduce yourself. He/she can then help point you in the right direction and can introduce you to other attendees to get you off on the right foot.

Treat people like friends. Would you go to a friend, interrupt his/her conversation, hand over a business card, talk about yourself and then walk away? Of course not. Treat new networking relationships as you’d treat your friendships. Build rapport and trust that business will happen.

Ask great questions. The only way to get to know someone else is to ask them genuine and thoughtful questions. It’s always best to walk away from a conversation having allowed the other person to speak more than you did. Not only will they feel great about the conversation, but you’ll have gotten to know a lot about him/her, helping you plan and execute your follow-up more thoughtfully.

Don't Try And Sell

There is nothing more awkward then someone trying to sell you something immediately upon meeting them. The approach that works best is to go in with the goal of finding good prospects and then trying to set up meetings with those people. If the interaction is going well either ask for the meeting in the discussion and try and set a date, or if the conversation is more casual end the conversation with a line hinting at that ‘we should meet’. Something like "It was nice talking to you, we should meet up sometime to see if we can help each other. I'll send you an email. Have a great night."

Sharing is caring. This is no less true now than it was in kindergarten. If you are willing to share your contacts and resources, others will be more likely to help you as well. Develop a sincerity in your giving nature without expectation of something in return.

Consider their network. When meeting people, it’s important to remember that even if they can’t help you directly, someone in their network probably can.

Treat connecting like a puzzle. If you’re asking great questions and considering how you can help others, you’ll naturally start to draw connections between who you are talking to and others in your network. Offer to make these connections! Perhaps they are two people who have the same target client industry, or maybe you know that a contact of yours is looking for the service the other provides. Encourage both parties to follow up with you after they meet so that you can hear what came of their interaction. It will not only pay dividends for you, it will also help you hone your matchmaking skills.

Don’t be a card spammer. The closest thing to you throwing all of your business cards away is handing them out to anyone and everyone you meet without them asking. If you haven’t built enough rapport with someone to encourage them to ask for your card, don’t offer one.

Be specific. The more specific you can be about what you do and what others can do to help you (if they ask), the better. Tell them the names of a few specific companies you’re looking to work with.

Ask yourself why they should care. Consider why the person you’re speaking to should care about what you’re saying. Craft your conversations accordingly. You only have a short time to make an impression, so try to make it favourable.

Be engaged. 

• When a person is talking to you, be sure to look directly at them. Giving a person full attention with your eyes will encourage them to share more. Remember, however, that it’s not a “stare-down” contest. Give the person 3-5 seconds of eye contact and then look away briefly before returning your focus to them again.
• Nod your head and tilt your body towards them when you’re speaking. These small cues go a long way towards making them feel like you care, which helps you to build rapport and trust: the foundation on which you can later do business.
• Also tilt your head as you listen to them. It is an effective body language technique that communicates that you’re paying attention to what they’re saying.
•  After the person has shared something with you, ask them another question about what they just said. This shows that you’re paying attention and that you care about what they’re telling you.

Do NOT “work the room.” Don’t try to meet as many people as possible in a room; focus on making just a few solid connections. People can sense when you’re simply speaking with them to grab their card and go. These short interactions will not be memorable and therefore work against you. Aim to meet a few people and begin a meaningful dialogue.

Don’t be afraid to join in. There is nothing wrong with joining a conversation and waiting for a natural break in the chatter to introduce yourself. In most cases, the people who are already speaking will enjoy the interruption because it gives them a chance to meet someone new. If you sense that you’ve entered into a serious discussion, it’s okay to politely excuse yourself.

Your business card 

Try using an eye-catching colour or shape for your business card to help it stand out. As a job hunter, don't let the back of your business card go to waste. Use that space for a mini-resume or a description of the position you are seeking.

Where possible eat before you go. Unfortunately most function centres, restaurants and conference venues serve food that is not networking friendly. You will often be in a situation where you are left holding a chicken bone, stick or oyster shell making it difficult to meet people and exchange cards.

Eating before you go will assist you by minimising the chance of spilling food, drink or having something green stay in your teeth for all to see. Importantly, you will be more focused on what is going on and less likely to stalk the waiter because you haven’t eaten all day.

Always keep one hand free to allow yourself to shake hands with people. This means that you shouldn’t eat and drink at the same time. Remember, this is a networking event, not a full-course meal.

Make sure you are hands free. This allows you to readily access your business cards to exchange and shake hands with those that you meet. Ensure that you leave a good arms length between you and the person you are meeting. Most people value their personal space and you want to allow yourself the best opportunity to make an impression.

Avoid alcohol at business networking functions.  Remember it is a business function and not party time! If you want to drink, alternate alcohol with water or ask for a half glass serving.

 Business networking friendly clothes

It’s a good idea to wear what is called as networking friendly clothes: clothing items (jackets) that have pockets so that you can always have easy access to your business cards and a place to put cards from the people you meet.

Ensure you select a networking friendly handbag that allows easy access to your business cards. Wear comfortable shoes, especially if you are standing at an event, leaning from one side to another looks uncomfortable and can be distracting. When standing, ensure your weight is distributed evenly and your stance is even, then you will be able to stand for much longer and remain focused on your conversations rather than your sore, tired feet!

Being left alone, talking to a bore and breaking into group conversations

If you are worried about not knowing anyone at the function or event and having no-one to talk to, make sure you call ahead and ask the organiser to introduce you to someone when you arrive so that you won’t be left standing alone. It is in the organiser’s best interests to do this as they want their attendees to have an enjoyable experience.

Extracting yourself from a boring or teeth pulling conversation is probably one of the most stressful networking experiences you can have and it is usually what stops most people from attending functions regularly. Before you go to a business networking event, be armed with some well-directed questions that can steer the conversation the way you want it to go or be prepared with some standard extraction techniques.

Possible extraction techniques:

The classic exit strategy is a variation of  “It’s been really nice talking to you” or “It was nice meeting you.”

If someone says that to you, you say: “Thanks, I enjoyed it too” and then you WRAP IT UP and MOVE AWAY because the conversation is OVER NOW.

You can combine that exit with a reason or a place you are going next. “You’ll have to excuse me, I spotted my friend across the room and I want to make sure I say hello/ask her a question/pass her the secret plans for our jewel-heist later. It’s been really nice talking with you, have a great night!”

 Other reasons to leave:

• You need to feed the parking meter.
• You need to step outside to make a phone call.
• You need to get another drink.
• You need to visit the bathroom.
• You need to ask so-and-so a question.
• A blanket “I need to excuse myself for a moment” or “Please excuse me,” will do in a pinch. (People will assume you mean: “...to go to the bathroom,” but everyone poops so don’t worry about it.)

You can say “Maybe I’ll run into you later” or “Maybe we can pick up this discussion later” if you want to circle back to talk to them again.

Here are some more tips:

• Don’t worry if your reason is a white lie. You may not actually need to pee when you excuse yourself. That’s ok. Go to the rest room, wash your hands, collect yourself, and when you come out find yourself a new conversational partner.
• It’s not a question. You’re not asking permission to leave, you’re informing that you’re leaving. So state “So nice talking with you! I need to excuse myself. If I don’t talk to you later, enjoy the party” and then walk away.
• If the person doesn’t take the hint, you can escalate/interrupt. “I’m so sorry to cut you off, but I need to step away for a moment. Maybe we’ll pick this up later!” and then leave the area.

Should you run into your Close-talking Monopolizer again, you can be much more direct and assertive.

Start with: “I’m so sorry – I’ve enjoyed talking with you, but I also want to make sure I catch up with x, y, and z person. Please excuse me.” (Move away.)

If he follows you or talks over you once you’ve tried to end the conversation, he is giving you permission to be EXTREMELY direct.

“I’m sorry to cut you off, but I’m going to go talk to x & y now. I’ll see you next time, maybe.” (Move away).

“It’s great seeing you again, but I really want to circulate a bit and talk to some other people. Maybe catch you next time.” (Move away).

 A few methods to break into existing conversations.

• The first is to make eye contact with one of the people and smile at them and simply say “Do you mind if I join you?” No-one would ever say “No you can’t.”
• Secondly, ask someone else to break in and introduce you. As mentioned earlier, the organiser really does want you to enjoy yourself and not feel stressed, so ask them to introduce you.
• Thirdly take a buddy that can do the conversation openers for you. Be careful not to just speak to them for the entire event as this will contradict what you are aiming to do.

Follow up.

The best networkers are those who meet people, take notes and follow up next day. This is a great way to build relationships with people and it is these people who get the job.