Networking Lessons my Dad taught me

Growing up, I watched my dad visit and stay in touch with folks around our small town of Orangefield, Texas. As a former school board member, he would trek to the administration building each morning to have coffee with the superintendent and others. Then, he went to the local water office, credit union, and hardware store. Some 35+ years later, now in his eighties, my father still makes the rounds around town. He is also considered by many an influencer in our community. Now, he does not refer to his activities as networking. It is just what he does. Watching Dad, I have learned valuable business networking lessons that have helped me grow my business and reputation.

No Agenda Necessary: Networking should not be for immediate gain. It is about building relationships, not agendas. Approaching networking with the right attitude and heart is about being engaged and communicating your brand, organization, and vision to as broad an audience as possible. Over time, these seeds take root, and the value will return to you.

Give, and You Shall Receive: Before asking anything of anyone, make it a point to help others first. Influencers are regularly being asked for favors and advice. Building relationships is about adding value to others. To succeed in networking, you do so without expecting anything in return. You will reap the benefits only after you give. Genuinely try to help others with what they need or want.

Connect Others: Helping others succeed is a great way to establish the foundation for future value. Become a super-connector and build your brand by connecting with others without an agenda or seeking anything in return.

Listen First. By listening to others, you can genuinely understand their specific needs and provide more value. Remember, networking is not always about your brand or business.

Share Your Vision: Share your ideas. If they like them, chances are you will be hired to execute them. If they do not hire you and steal your idea, be complimented, not disappointed.

Be Ethical: You may find yourself in a networking situation with the potential to cross ethical lines. Save yourself the misfortune and not be drawn into an unethical position. I have made a lot of decent deals in business, and I have not had to cheat, screw over a business partner, or do anything else. I am not proud to make those connections.

Include Others: Make it a habit of introducing people to each other and making people feel included. Invite people to socialize before or after an event or share drinks, dinner, and stories. Folks remember you when you make an effort to include them.

Give Others Your Full Attention: Looking around for somebody more desirable to visit with or speak to is an excellent way to doom a good relationship from the start. Give everyone your full attention and be genuinely present in conversations. Listen with your whole body, or as my mother taught me – listen with your eyes. If you mindlessly nod without knowing what the other person is talking about, that may be a sign that you are wandering. Every person matters.

Conduct Yourself Well: Your brand is your reputation. Just remember, what happens in Vegas does not always stay in Vegas. While having a few adult beverages at that business conference (networking) may make sense, do not spoil the experience by going wild. There is a good chance your clowning around will be published on one of the many social media sites. Internet search engines do not consider your state of mind as they merely compile search rankings, and before you know it, you could end up with some undesirable results (and photos or videos) attached to your name. Ok – I did not learn this lesson from Dad, as he does not drink alcohol– this is one I have learned the hard way. Learn from my missteps.

Watching my dad, I have also understood that there is no guaranteed way to ensure a good networking experience, but his lessons have made it somewhat more comfortable. Everyone we talk with expects something different, just as each personality leads to another type of conversation. Having the basics down can lead to an improved and more meaningful connection. Try following these lessons during your networking opportunity – and seriously, do not drink too much at those happy hours.

HAPPY FATHERS DAY