A networking horror story

What’s the worst part of attending a networking group for you? For most people, it’s the 60 second elevator pitch you deliver to the main group. It’s crazy, you know your stuff and suddenly, when all eyes turn to you, you get nervous. It happens to us all - actors say if we didn’t have the nerves we wouldn’t be able to perform effectively.

I attended a networking group event recently, and one chap delivered his elevator pitch. He mumbled, looked down throughout, and fumbled his words. You didn’t need to have a psychology degree to know he was out of his depth, uncomfortable and not pleased with his pitch at all.

What happened next was just cringeworthy, from professional peers. Members of the group then started to give advice, and/or feedback:

“You should have planned what you were going to say.”

“I always write mine down so I don’t forget anything.”

“Sit up straight, it helps your voice.”

“I didn’t feel confident in you.”

Then others came in with various ‘formulas’ on how to do a memorable intro.

All the time, the poor chap’s body language got more and more uncomfortable, he was squirming in his seat and sighing.

When I was asked my opinion from the group, I asked if it was part of how they do things at their events – ‘Do you normally give feedback on some people’s elevator pitches straight after they have delivered them?’, I asked. They said No. I was about to deliver my pitch, so you can imagine how I felt! I then said I felt that it was inappropriate to deliver feedback without being invited to do so.

My comment seemed to quieten the pack behaviour down, yet most eyes remained on him. He said “I’m not doing it again, if that’s what you’re meaning.”. What kind of day did he have following this, I wonder? I think we all forget how fragile we can be, and how easily our confidence and ego can be crushed. I attended as a guest, and the strapline of the event promised words like “fun, learning, support…” – things we look for in a network group.

For me, networking is about being yourself. I have attended many training events on networking, and I run a half day session, and each person has their own way of pitching. I encourage people to find their own style, as then they deliver it living their values. I realise that this chap needs some techniques, sure, but a good group will run sessions on how to network.

It’s given me food for thought on values of a trainers network I run, as I think we need to know where we get things right, and where we can improve. I would hate it if someone wrote a horror story after one of my events.

What are your thoughts?