Network like an Introvert...

The majority of introverts I know always say to me I hate networking events.

I totally get it. As an introvert myself I like the idea of them until it’s time to attend, and then I would prefer to throw on my pjs and work at home or hide in the office out of the way.

However, the more I support female introvert leaders to step into the spotlight in their own way, the more I realise just how great us introverts are at networking.

We often get hit with the quiet and shy label and that we aren’t ‘people’ people. Not true.

To be honest there are times that I enjoy the quiet away from others, but this doesn't mean for one second that we don’t like people. We love interesting people. Those conversations that actually matter. Not the small talk that feels awkward and includes whether it rained yesterday, where you going on holiday or what you doing later, but the real conversations so we can make real connections.

So if you want to make networking work for you then why not take a leaf out of an introvert’s book ….

Here are 3 ways that I know introverts can play to their strengths and get the most out of networking even if they hate talking to strangers.

1. Focus on 1–1

That’s an introvert’s superpower — replace the term ‘networking’ for ‘connecting’. See how different that feels already? Connecting with others is amazing and it doesn't mean you have to connect with everyone all at once — that’s exhausting — but be selective, connect with those people you are really interested in meeting and let go of the potential outcome and just enjoy it.

2. Scan the room — don’t work it

You don’t have to ‘work the room’ and talk to everybody at the event. Just decide beforehand (especially if there is a delegate list) who you would love to connect with and / or give yourself a goal of connecting with a small amount of people — take the pressure off. And remember it is perfectly ok to take some time to soak up the atmosphere and sit on your own. I often do this to scan the room, and although it can make others twitch, I am comfortable enough to know that I am ok just being. People will inevitably come on over and see if you are ‘ok’ so see it as a great opportunity to ask them about what they love to do.

3. It’s all in the follow up

Introverts are great at deepening relationships and that can happen in the follow up. Even better if you can remember key things from your conversation and have genuine interest in keeping the conversation flowing long after the event has finished. Real connections happen when there is trust and respect. Do what you say you will do. And use those listening and reflective skills to your advantage. You may hear what others miss.

Find the right networking event for you and go for it.

So why not try attending an event and reframing your perspective on networking and start to make real connections with other people. You might find that you can actually have fun with it and open up a world of new opportunities. You never know what will come from the new people you meet.

** Gemma Stow works with introvert female leaders who are ready to put themselves forward, own their expertise and step into the spotlight in a way that feels good and makes the impact they want. As well as private coaching using high level techniques including CBT, NLP and MI , and her mastermind 'No More Hiding' group coaching, she created the No More Hiding: Self Promotion at Work podcast. Book in a chat with Gemma if you are looking to increase your confidence so that you can do the things you keep telling yourself you can’t do **

[First Published for Medium: https://medium.com/@gemma_stow/network-like-an-introvert-e1cf2a106ac8]