Neighborly Advice

When Loving Your Neighbor is Hard

By Leah J. Myers, Esq.

During the pandemic, Legal Counsel for the Elderly’s Legal Hotline has seen an increase in calls about problems that our clients are facing with their District neighbors. This makes sense. With everyone staying at home more and under a lot of stress, we are all more on edge. This can lead to aggressive behavior between neighbors and an increased sensitivity to the ordinary annoyances of city living. Unfortunately, when the person who is causing problems lives upstairs or next door, it’s hard to ignore them or the problems they are causing.

The funny thing about these situations is that even though your first instinct might be to call for outside help, getting “the law” involved almost always escalates conflict. Problems with neighbors are often – though not always – relationship problems, and relationship problems are not usually well-served by escalation. ?If you are going to have deal with a person on a daily basis, you need to think about how to repair the relationship so you can get along with each other in the long term. I’ll talk about when to call the police, a government agency, and when to take your neighbor to court later on.

Special Considerations for Tenants

The relationships we have with our neighbors are complicated, and when we are tenants, there is usually a landlord in the middle. Neighbor conflict can feel especially frustrating because someone is violating the “social contract” – that unspoken agreement that we should all be allowed to enjoy our homes in peace. ?But, the law is best at enforcing written contracts. If you are a tenant, you only have a written contract with your landlord to try and enforce. Your neighbor has one too. There is no contract between the two of you to enforce.

Keep in mind:

Tenants can enforce their own lease and DC law against their landlord.

• One tenant cannot enforce lease obligations against another tenant.
• Tenants can enforce a very few DC laws against each other, for example, the noise ordinance.
• Landlords can enforce the lease and DC law against their tenants.

Homeowners

?With homeowners, there’s no middle-person, but homeowners need to understand:

• Owners have limited rights to enforce DC law against their neighbors, unless they or their property have been directly harmed.
• Laws prohibiting many neighborly nuisances – tall grass, trash in the yard, or unsightly neglect of the home – are enforced by DCRA or other DC agencies.

What to Do?

Even if you have a claim against your neighbor that you could take to court, it is usually a good idea to try to work it out with the neighbor first – unless the neighbor has threatened you with violence or already hurt you.

It can be awkward to approach a conflict situation with someone you have to live next to, just as it can be awkward to live next to them after you sue them! So, it’s a good idea to enlist some help.

Here are some steps to try:

• Try the plate of cookies approach: yes, it’s a cliché, and yes, it can work. Consider extending a small gesture of hospitality to your neighbor, approaching them with the idea of solving a mutual problem. Look for a win-win solution. Of course, it’s better to establish a good relationship before things go wrong, but it’s usually not too late to be neighborly.
• Sometimes just learning your neighbor’s point of view can make a difference. Maybe the grass is too high because they were in a car accident and can no longer mow. You will feel better knowing they are not neglecting the yard on purpose, and perhaps you can help them connect with a volunteer organization to mow their lawn until they recover.
• If you can’t or don’t feel comfortable approaching your neighbor directly, consider involving a third party, like a social worker, a clergy person, or your ANC representative. There are also free community mediation services you can ask to help:

Community?Mediation?DC 240-766-5311??

Multi-Door Dispute Resolution (court-based, free community mediation) 202-879-1549

• If the neighbor is a tenant, you can approach your landlord (if you rent from the same landlord) or their landlord (if they rent from someone else), to see if the landlord can intervene. Even if you can’t sue the tenant, the landlord may be able to send a notice to the tenant to ask them to stop engaging in a troublesome behavior. Remember, you probably won’t be told what actions the landlord is taking against your neighbor but that does not mean the landlord is unaware or doing nothing.
• Document what is happening and who you have asked for help. For example, you can keep noise complaints in a journal and you can send a list of each month’s noises that woke you to the landlord by e-mail.
• Talk to other neighbors. If they are bothered by the same behavior, they can take steps too. Sometimes one person complaining sounds personal, but it your increases legitimacy if many neighbors have the same issue.
• If the neighbor is a homeowner, and what they are doing violates DC law, you can call 311 to contact DCRA or any other DC agency that is responsible for enforcing the law in question.
• Even if you can’t solve the problem, avoid calling the police or otherwise escalating the conflict, unless the situation is threatening your physical safety.
• Remember, unless you move, you are going to be dealing with the neighbor until they do!

Emergencies

• There are some special cases, when you should talk to a lawyer right away:
• Your neighbor is hurting you or stealing from you. If you are in danger right now, call 911, and call a lawyer after you are safe.
• Your neighbor is trying to talk you into a financial agreement or get you to sign over property, money, or get your power of attorney.
• Your neighbor or their lawyer asks you to sign any papers you don’t understand or don’t agree to.
• Your neighbor takes you to court.

So, what do you do if you’ve tried everything, and nothing works? Not sure whether you can go to court, or if you want to? If you’re a DC resident over the age of 60, you can call Legal Counsel for the Elderly’s Legal Hotline at (202) 434-2120. We usually won’t go to court with you on problems with your neighbor, but our Hotline Attorneys will talk with you about your legal options and provide advice and direction on what to try next. Not 60 or not a DC resident? Visit www.lawhelp.org to locate legal services in your community.

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Leah J. Myers is an attorney licensed in the District of Columbia and manages the Legal Hotline at Legal Counsel for the Elderly. She has been counseling District tenants and homeowners about these and related issues since 2006. This article contains legal information applicable in the District of Columbia only, and is accurate as of December 2021. However, this article is not legal advice. If you need legal advice, should contact a lawyer licensed in the jurisdiction where you live to discuss your individual concerns.