Negativity Bias: Evolutionary Protector or Overprotective Friend?

Our understanding of the human mind remains incomplete, much like how we have only explored 5% of the oceans, there is much more to discover about what makes us tick. However, recent years have brought a more nuanced understanding of the mind, particularly the mind-body connection, which I incorporate into my work with clients. But more on that in another newsletter!

In this week's newsletter, I want to reflect on something I have been working on with clients this week that can really hold us back from where we want to be - our evolutionary protector, the "negativity bias."

Negativity Bias: We are hardwired to subconsciously give more psychological significance to negative experiences than positive ones.

If you're currently grappling with this yourself, whether in your personal life or work/business, rest assured that you're not alone.

Did you know it takes about three positive instances to counterbalance the weight of a single negative event?

How does "negativity bias" impact us?

If you've not come across the concept of negativity bias before, here's how it might show up for you:

• Self-Critisism: Constantly doubting your abilities due to a persistent inner critic, leading to self-doubt, negative self-talk, and feelings of inadequacy.This might look like Lisa, who was starting a new exercise routine. She missed her Tuesday morning class due to sleeping in. Understandable? Well, of course, this happens to us all, but her inner critic kicks in: "You're lazy. You'll never be able to do this. You're just not as committed as Tina - bet she never misses a class." Or Tom, who has spent weeks preparing for a presentation, and as he starts, he feels his heart racing and thinks, "What if I stumble over my words and sound stupid. John would probably do this much better; he's much more confident".
• Emotional Tug-of-War or the Dread Spiral: Once we latch on to one of these thoughts as being the truth, we can get caught in a cycle of negative emotions that can feel overpowering.
• Inertia: Experiencing this over days, even weeks, can leave us feeling trapped; our mindset becomes closed rather than open, and we become fixed on seeing the negatives and feel unable to believe there are alternative ways of thinking and being.

If the negativity bias has such a detrimental impact on us, then why do we have it?

Imagine you're out in the wild thousands of years ago when humans lived in caves and had to survive in a world full of dangers like wild animals. Back then, we needed to stay alert to avoid getting hurt or eaten by those animals. This ability to spot potential dangers quickly and remember them became really important for survival.

Fast forward to today, when don't have to fight off wild tigers and bears but our brains don't know this and still fall back on this old instinct. It's like having an alarm system that's a bit too sensitive – it goes off even when there's no real danger. This is what we call the "negativity bias."

So, in our modern lives, we tend to pay more attention to things that could go wrong or be bad for us. Our minds often get stuck on the negative stuff, even if many positive things are happening around us. This can make us worry more about mistakes we've made or focus on problems instead of enjoying the good moments.

Back when we lived in caves, this alarm system was really helpful for staying safe. But in today's world, it can make us feel more stressed or anxious than we need to be. That's why understanding this old instinct and learning how to balance it with the positive things in our lives is important for our well-being.

Think of negativity bias like having an overprotective friend who always warns you about everything, even when the situation is actually fine or the mother who keeps telling their child to "be careful". They mean well and can sometimes be helpful but also need to be reminded to take a step back and see the good stuff too.

So, how do we shift our focus to the good stuff when we are programmed to see the negatives?

1. Mindful Witnessing: Practicing mindfulness heightens awareness of thoughts and emotions, enabling you to intercept negativity as it emerges.Try this: Dedicate a few minutes each day to sit quietly and become an observer of your thoughts, free from judgment. Notice how it feels to step away and observe rather than being in the thoughts.
2. Cognitive Reframing: Challenge negative thoughts by questioning their validity and then reframe them with a more balanced lens.Try this: Replace "I always struggle with new things" with "I've overcome challenges before; I can do this."
3. Gratitude Rituals: Daily gratitude exercises refocus you toward life's positives, moving that inner critic to the back seat.Try This: Start or end each day by listing three things you're grateful or thankful for, no matter how small. The important part of this is that you feel it as well as saying it.

Remember that you have the ability to rewrite your narrative, transforming your experience and empowering you to feel more able to move through life.

If you're struggling with self-doubt and criticism, let's talk about how I can support you through bespoke 1-to-1 trauma release sessions, group coaching, or trauma-informed training for professionals and workplaces.

How have you dealt with your negativity bias? Share your experiences so we can learn from and support each other in transforming our internal narratives.