Neck flush

When I did my Tedx talk, I wore 2 pairs of underpants so I could tuck my shirt in safely.

I also knew that, when my name got called out:

• My hands would get shaky.
• My mind would go blank.
• My voice would wobble.
• I’d talk too fast.

I knew this because, having done countless talks, my adrenaline is a familiar visitor.

Do you experience adrenaline when you are public speaking?

It can look like:

• Your mind going blank.
• Forgetting why you’re somewhere.
• Neck and face flush!
• Sweaty back.
• Talking 2000% faster.
• All of a sudden your voice sounds like a chipmunk.
• Forgetting to breathe when talking.
• Throwing up.
• Diarrhoea before the meeting.

Sound familiar??

You’re not alone. Approximately 70% of people would rather do anything else (get a divorce, quit their job), than speak in public. So, you’re in good company.

Adrenaline is like a sneaky balloon.

I like to think of adrenaline as a helium balloon that sneaks into the room with you when you’re about to do something new, or exciting.

The air in the balloon needs to get out, for it not to get in the way or steal the show.

If adrenaline knows where to go, it can actually be useful.

Instead of fighting my adrenaline, over the years, I’ve come to accept it and create ways to work with it, instead of against it.?

When we expect adrenaline, we can lower any judgement we might have about experiencing it, and instead find creative ways to work with it.?

Instead of ‘shutting it down’, we can start thinking about ways to use that energy to actually power our presentations.

For example, instead of saying ‘Goddammit, not now’, we can quietly and slowly say to ourselves before and during our presentations: ‘Hello, I’ve been expecting you’.

Here are some examples:

• By actually expecting adrenaline, the judgement that comes with it dissipates a bit. Come up with some funny one liners you can say to yourself to welcome it. Examples might be ‘Hellooo neck flush’, or ‘I’ve been expecting you, pounding chest’. It sounds wild, but I’ve found helping yourself laugh on the inside reminds you: this just me, saying some words out loud.
• Giving your audience a job helps buy you some time while adrenaline is at the wheel. Asking the audience a question, asking people to share where they are ‘dialling in from today’ or sharing their #1 question on a notepad to share in the session buys you time while your body gets settled into the room.
• When your audience is doing a job, breathe in deeply and out slowly. This slows down our thoughts, and reminds us: we have got this.

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• Create a ‘comfort routine’. The idea is that you’re reminding your nervous system you’re safe, with familiarity. Something I like to do, while presenting virtually, is kick off my slippers and rub my feet on the ground. It reminds me that I’m just in my office, saying some words.
• Wearing a high neck top or shirt to mask ‘flush neck’. Find an outfit that masks it, while you get comfortable. I’ve personally committed to power suits for the optics and for the benefits of hiding flush-chest!
• Preparing for worse case scenarios. It sounds depressing but I’ve discovered, having a back up plan in case everything goes wrong gives you a sense of security on the day. That could mean, having a copy of your presentation printed out; having your first word written down on a note page somewhere if you get lost; making a plan to ask the audience a question in case the projector turns off randomly (been there).
• Reframing ‘nervous’ for excited. Studies have actually shown that reframing fear of public speaking to excitement tricks our brains into enjoying the experience. Why? Both anxiety and excitement are states of arousal. So when we tell ourselves, ‘I’m excited’, we might not believe it at first, but over time, we can start to see it as an opportunity (what there is to gain) as opposed to a threat (what there is to lose).

When I walked out to that Tedx stage, my mind went blank.

My heart was racing. My throat got tight.?

What feels like about three hours in our mind is usually about 10 seconds on stage, so I knew that my sense of time was warped. I knew I could take a minute to just breathe and look at my sneaky note written on my hand to get me started if I needed to and about 1.5 seconds would go past, looking like I’d planned it.

Back up plans were activated.

And you know what I said to myself??

“There’s no hurry. Take your time.”

What I did was just smile, and wave, and ground my feet on the ground for a little bit. When the applause stopped, I just grinned.

I had no idea what my first word was. But, by having my own back, at that moment, I gave my hand a sneaky little look with the first words of my speech on it, and started talking.

I have no memory of what happened next. But, that’s the beautiful thing about adrenaline: it has your back, too. It gets the job done.

Having our own backs not only makes life easier, but it’s a nicer experience, for us, too.

Did you know we teach a course called Presenting with Confidence for workplaces? Bring these tips to your team, today.