Navigating your shift in identity
The other day, on the way back from London, I met Leon. And we got chatting, as you do.
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Aged 77, he was still acting as managing director of a manufacturing firm in Coalville, and I asked him why.
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He replied: “I don’t know what my identity is outside of work.”
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It got me thinking.
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Why is it that we so often hold on to what we think defines us, when what’s ahead could be just as good?
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The journey I’ve been on over the past year and a half has, at times, been tough on my sense of self. Having worked full-time for all of my adult life, I attached so much of who I was to my work.
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But coming back to Creative Bridge , this time as chair, has been different. Good different. We’re changing and growing with Michelle now at the helm and I’m excited about the evolution of our offer and the pivots that we are making.
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My personal shifts are just part of that; it’s been, and continues to be, a journey.
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Today, I want to share some insights I’ve had along the way.
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I hope they help you as you evolve your own identity.
?1. Remember who you are
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Whether you’re a chief executive planning your exit strategy, a housing provider facing new regulation or a leader stepping into a new role, just stopping to map out who you really are can help.
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When I’m in treatment I’ve learnt to be intentional about remembering that I’m not (just) a cancer patient. I’m Nana Nicky, I’m a wife, daughter, sister, friend, auntie, I’m CB’s chair, I’m me.
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Taking time to remember who you are will ground you. And may well give you some new insights too. Things that have been ‘top of the list’ at one point, are often replaced by something new.
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2. Release and let go
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It’s ugly; the bit just before the caterpillar turns into a butterfly. And embracing this natural ‘messy stage’ of letting go is vital.
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I experienced this physically on my journey. I lost my hair of course, but also much of my strength and on occasions, my independence. But what surprised me was that who I was on the inside was stripped back too.
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I had no choice but to surrender (which if you’re used to being in control, is not easy!). For me, I had to experience the ugly, the painful and the scary, to enable me to find new pathways. I had to let go, to find the future me.
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I think this applies at both a personal and an organisational level.
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3. Redefine
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We can’t detach our identity from our environment. But we can choose what much of our environment looks like. Personally, this means being intentional about the circles of people I choose to connect with. This is true for organisations too, as you can redefine your own offer to suit the refreshed you, and your changing environment.
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I now work part-time and have a community outside of my working world that didn’t exist before my cancer diagnosis. I celebrate both of these changes.
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Alongside my part-time work, practicing yoga, using acupuncture and spending time with my grandchildren have all created new circles that I define myself by and in.
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As I move between these circles, I’ve realised that whatever my role, the truths about who I am and what I value remain: ?
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I choose connection.
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I seek to be creative.
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And I aim to have impact.
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When I’m true to myself I am me. I add value and I can see purpose in what I do.
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So, if you’re embarking on, or in the middle of, an identity journey, I’d like to leave you with these thoughts to ponder:
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Give yourself space to explore - the answers will come.
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The growth is always in the journey. So thank you Leon.
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Communications lead at PlaceShapers, the national network of place-based housing associations.
6 个月Thank you Leon. Thank you Nicola. ?There is much grace and wisdom in this and you are so generous to share it with us so thoughtfully.
Chief Executive QuestGates Group, Director Vrs adjusters, CPAQuestGates,Hyperion,RamseyMcMichael,Structural surveys, BTA,K H holiday homes and QGLAW.
6 个月What an inspiring note Nicola. Our health is one of the few things where whatever we do luck plays a part and you have clearly been very “ unlucky” but how you have handled it is amazing and I am sure that your words can only help others who unfortunately find themselves in the same position. My role has changed as the business has grown/ developed but for me “ success” and/ or money can never be the drivers and you should never live to work. For me I will keep working as long as I enjoy doing what I do and it annoys others that I do so! Hopefully catch up soon.
Lover of Marketing ?? Teller of stories and changer of hearts and minds?? Passionate about audiences ?? Excited about all things nature, culture and heritage ?? Trying to be a little bit more sustainable every day ??
6 个月I love this Nicola. Thank you. Your timing is impeccable too. Continuing to inspire me long after I stopped working for you ??
Bardell Pearce, Brand Agency, MD. Helping your brand be found by your target audience through great creative | Creative Mentor and Advisor to new agencies and designers | NED
6 个月“Release and let go…” I’ve heard people say “he gave up”, but what actually happened was a realisation or acceptance of the need for change. Recognising you need change is so refreshing and vital to a person once they’ve come to that conclusion that’s it’s what they need to do. We’re not all here to live the same day, every day, forever. ??????
Helping organisations grow through strong brands and smart marketing | Strategic Consultant: Branding & Marketing
6 个月I love this Nicola. For me, being far away from the home I grew up in, going back there is always an opportunity to recalibrate who I am. I feel get lost and drift away, then I feel the need to be grounded/anchored the instant I get there. I come back feeling restored, renewed, relaxed, rested, rejuvenated, connected and more, with a greater sense of who I am than when I first arrived. Always.