Navigating the ocean of self-help advice

What’s the key to a happy and fulfilling life? Is it money or health? Intelligence or ambition? More friends or better friends? Nature or nurture? According to thousands of years of expert advice, the secret to improving your life is a mix of all the above.

Anyone seeking self-help ideas faces an overwhelming amount of sometimes conflicting information. You could spend a lifetime exploring advice in sources ranging from the Bible and Aristotle’s scrolls to Dale Carnegie's lectures to the millions of books and websites available today.

What’s missing is a comprehensive guide that not only showcases the best advice but also demonstrates how to apply it to your life.

I encountered this challenge more than four years ago when I started writing the Celebrations Pulse letter to stay connected with the customers of 1-800-Flowers.com and its brands. The goal of the weekly letter wasn’t to sell products but to foster community, share experiences, and offer insights on building stronger relationships.

The letter became more popular than I ever imagined, prompting me to dig deeper into the self-help library for inspiration. I began questioning how anyone could untangle and benefit from all this information.

That’s when I took a page from many self-help books and found a friend to join me on this journey. Our friendship blossomed, leading us to create the book I had always been looking for: Lodestar: Tapping Into the 10 Timeless Pillars of Success . It will be available nationwide tomorrow.

A friendship blooms into a book

While researching for a Celebrations Pulse letter, I found a fascinating article in Psychology Today about the pandemic’s impact on connection. It was written by George S. Everly, Jr., PhD, ABPP, FAPA, FACLP , an esteemed clinical psychologist and public health expert who holds faculty positions at the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health and School of Medicine.

Impressed by the article, I wrote him a fan letter and asked if he’d like to chat. Later, he told me he wasn’t sure what I wanted to discuss, but he agreed anyway. I’m glad he did!

Soon after our first conversation, George and I started referring to ourselves as “COVID buddies.” As our friendship grew, we discovered that we shared numerous passions, including the desire to be the best versions of ourselves, help others do the same, foster connections, and combat the epidemic of loneliness .

I invited George to join 1-800-Flowers.com ’s Connectivity Council , a panel of experts who advise on topics and provide expertise for Celebrations Pulse. He introduced me to his community of psychologists while I extended introductions to my network of academic and business friends.

Our relationship became a collaborative effort built around growing a community of people with a shared interest in helping others and spreading positivity.

In 2022, George invited me to work on a book together. I was deeply flattered. Given all that we were already doing, he suggested that writing a book would be a wonderful way to focus our thoughts and share them with a wider audience. I immediately agreed.

A labor of love and friendship

Two years later, we’re publishing Lodestar, a self-help book unlike any other. It draws on themes from the most influential and credible self-help books of the last century – books that have collectively sold hundreds of millions of copies – and dives into those themes with insights and anecdotes from me, George, and other notable figures.

We began by conducting a factor analysis, comparing the content of each top book to determine which topics appeared most frequently. We then filtered the list through our own experiences and those of historical figures, celebrities, and our friends.

Lodestar explores key principles such as harnessing optimism, building resilience, improving time management, embracing happiness, and strengthening relationships. Most importantly, we show you how to make these top ideas work for you.

As we wrote in the introduction: “If you close this book feeling more equipped to find success — whether you want to make it on your own terms, make the world a better place, or simply make it through the challenges ahead — and to be kind to yourself and others along the way, our job here is done.”

A shared vision

Lodestar has been a labor of love for both George and me. Working together on this project deepened our bond, turning the process of research and writing into a journey of mutual growth and discovery.

Our collaboration was driven by a shared commitment to create a meaningful and impactful work that has the power to change lives. We spent countless hours discussing ideas and refining insights to ensure that Lodestar offers actionable advice for readers.

Partnering with someone who shares your vision adds a profound layer of satisfaction to a project. George’s friendship has been a true gift in my life.

For us, Lodestar represents more than just a book; it symbolizes the strength of partnership and a shared commitment to making a positive difference. It’s a testament to the power of friendship.

We hope Lodestar becomes a beacon for those seeking to navigate their paths to success, happiness, and fulfillment. May this book serve as the starting point for your incredible journey toward becoming the best version of yourself.

All the best,

Jim