Navigating Life's Storms: My Journey with Dyslexia and High-Functioning Anxiety

Hey there, fellow travelers on the winding road of life. Today, I'm opening up about a journey that has been both tumultuous and enlightening, a journey marked by the constant companion of anxiety. At 44, I've learned that age doesn't necessarily bring immunity to the storm of worries that can plague the mind.

From the early days of my primary school years, anxiety wrapped its fingers around my heart, whispering doubts and fears that only a child's mind could conjure. It's amazing how seemingly innocuous thoughts, like the fear of returning home to an empty house, could spark an emotional tempest within. Little did I know, this was just the beginning.

Fast forward to adulthood, where life's challenges are no longer confined to the playground. Redundancy and the painful unraveling of family ties became the next battlegrounds. And just when I thought I had weathered those storms, life threw more challenges my way – a recent diagnosis of autism for my youngest son, a family member battling illness, the ongoing dance with dyslexia at work, and the rollercoaster ride of buying a new house.

In the midst of this whirlwind, a term came to light that resonated with my experience: High-Functioning Anxiety. It's not just a label; it's a revelation. High-Functioning Anxiety is like a silent puppeteer, pulling the strings behind the scenes while you continue to function in your daily life. It's the ability to put on a brave face, meet deadlines, and navigate social situations while your mind is a chaotic orchestra of worries and self-doubt.

For me, it's the art of hiding panic attacks behind a smile, pushing through the workday while a storm rages within, and convincing others that everything is okay when, at times, it feels like the world is caving in. High-Functioning Anxiety is, in essence, a masterclass in disguising vulnerability.

Acknowledging this facet of my mental health has been both liberating and challenging. It's a validation of the struggles I face daily, but it also demands a level of self-awareness that can be overwhelming. However, with every revelation comes an opportunity for growth.

This blog isn't just about airing my own struggles; it's a call to action. There are countless others silently wrestling with their own anxieties, and my hope is that by sharing my story, we can foster a sense of camaraderie. There is strength in vulnerability, and there is no shame in reaching out for help.

In my journey, medication has been a crucial ally. Just as one would take medicine for a physical ailment, treating anxiety with medication is a valid and necessary step. It's not a sign of weakness; it's a testament to resilience. If you're drowning in the sea of your thoughts, there's no shame in grabbing a life vest.

So, to those who find solace in these words, know that you are not alone. There is a community of silent warriors, and it's time to break the silence. Let's normalise seeking help, whether it be through therapy, medication, or simply opening up to a friend.

As I navigate the stormy seas of life, I extend a hand to anyone facing similar challenges. Together, we can weather the storms and emerge stronger on the other side. After all, there is immense power in saying, "I need help," and in that vulnerability, we find our greatest strength.

Glen

PS Please see below a list of common symptoms that certainly resonate me and may help you identity your High Functioning Anxiety [from research]:

1. Invisible Struggle:

One of the defining characteristics of high-functioning anxiety is that the symptoms may not be immediately apparent to others. Individuals with high-functioning anxiety often excel in their professional and personal lives, presenting a composed exterior, while internally dealing with intense anxiety.

2. Perfectionism:

High-functioning anxiety is frequently linked with perfectionism. Individuals may set excessively high standards for themselves and fear the consequences of not meeting these expectations. This constant pursuit of perfection can lead to increased stress and anxiety.

3. Overthinking and Worry:

People with high-functioning anxiety tend to overanalyze situations, anticipate problems, and engage in excessive worrying. Their minds may race with thoughts about potential future challenges or hypothetical scenarios, even if the perceived threat is not imminent.

4. Physical Symptoms:

While not always evident, high-functioning anxiety can manifest physically. Symptoms may include headaches, muscle tension, fatigue, stomachaches, and difficulty sleeping. These physical manifestations may be the body's response to chronic stress and anxiety.

5. Difficulty Relaxing:

Individuals with high-functioning anxiety often find it challenging to relax or enjoy leisure activities. Even during downtime, the mind may continue to race with thoughts and worries, making it difficult to fully unwind.

6. Need for Reassurance:

Seeking reassurance from others is a common behavior among those with high-functioning anxiety. The constant need for validation and approval can stem from a fear of making mistakes or not meeting perceived expectations.

7. Procrastination and Avoidance:

Despite high levels of productivity, individuals with high-functioning anxiety may engage in procrastination or avoidance behaviors. This could be a way of coping with the fear of failure or the anxiety associated with specific tasks.

8. Difficulty Delegating:

The fear of losing control or the belief that tasks won't be completed to their standards may lead individuals with high-functioning anxiety to struggle with delegation. They may prefer to handle everything themselves to ensure the desired outcome.

9. Impact on Relationships:

High-functioning anxiety can affect relationships, as the constant worry and need for perfection may create tension. Communication challenges may arise as individuals struggle to express their inner turmoil to others.

10. Reluctance to Seek Help:

Due to their ability to maintain a functional exterior, individuals with high-functioning anxiety may be hesitant to seek help. They may downplay their struggles or fear being perceived as weak, making it important to encourage a supportive environment for seeking assistance when needed.