Navigating the Election Disconnection

Real World Tactics from Scott Mann's Latest Book, Nobody is Coming to Save You: A Green Beret's Guide to Getting

Thank you for subscribing to Mann on a Mission newsletter, which I write for servant leaders just like you, every month. My mission is to address the Churn of Disconnection that's tearing us apart, propose best practices for bridging that Churn, and ways to get big sh*t done when nobody else is coming.

We’ve all seen it.?

As the election hits a crescendo pitch of mud-slinging and hype, we immerse ourselves in a 24-hour news cycle, which is constantly focused on the bad, moving us to heightened emotional states of concern and fear; and for a nefarious reason. After all, if there are good things happening in the world that we know nothing about, no big deal. But if there are bad things, threats to us and our families, and we don’t know about them? We could be at risk, and that is unacceptable. So, the news is all bad, even though the world isn’t.

And, of course, because the divisionist leaders who have the mics on the media and social media know danger sells in an attention-based economy. There is an incentive to fearmonger. Everything has become an “existential threat”—literally a threat to our very existence.

So, we live our lives surrounded by constant reminders of the dangers in the world, and our brains are forced into a constant fight-or-flight state. We can no longer have a friendly disagreement during a family reunion over who we voted for—not when the outcome of this election poses a potentially existential threat to our democracy. Now, instead of your other-partied 1st cousin having a different view, he has a dangerous view that you cannot tolerate. His views might get you killed. They might destroy the country before your children even have a chance to grow up.

These existential threats mean the stakes are always high, which makes people intolerant, irritable, uncreative, and critical. I call it the Churn, and it's a whole new enemy we face during these uncertain times.

Think about what you're seeing in society right now.?

And if our civil discourse continues to give way to in and out-group behavior, it will end—badly; with loss of revenue, division of our teams and communities and possibly even societal collapse.

The odds are that our political leaders in both parties will not change their divisionist behavior anytime soon, and certainly not before this election ends.

My prediction, and I hope I’m wrong...no matter who wins the Presidential race, we will be more divided as a nation after this election than when we started.

Nobody is coming to save you or me from this election disconnection. It's up to you. It's up to me. It's up to us.

Don't get me wrong. I'm actually very hopeful. We can still get big shit done.

So what is the solution to all this??

How can we make informed decisions when our election system and political leaders are falling short? What follows are three critical steps for navigating the election disconnection:

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1. Read the human operating system

There is a primal response that leaders are manufacturing in this election; you knowing this creates a competitive advantage.

Our brains have not changed in 25,000 years.

When we experience persistent fear, it puts us in a primal state of survival. Our sympathetic nervous system kicks into fight, flight or freeze. The ancient part of our brain, the amygdala that assigns the emergency conditions to us, doesn't know the difference between upsetting comments made by a detached politician and a grizzly bear charging you in attack mode. (Politicians know this, news producers know this, you should too).

When we are afraid, we become hyper-focused on the threat and surviving, even if the threat is another candidate or someone who believes differently than us. We go into a trance-like state, and the fear causes us to adopt a survival scarcity mindset. We start to group with those like us to help us survive. We start to look at other groups as the enemy. Hint: Ask yourself, am I starting to withdraw into groups that look and think just like me?

When we are in a trance state, our fear gives way to anger as a secondary emotion. Civil discourse disappears. Logic vanishes. The constant bombardment of social media and 24/7 news causes us to look at out-groups with contempt and rigid moral superiority.

Anger makes us stupid, according to psychiatrist Dr. Ivan Tyrrell.

In fact, negative content about rival out-groups is the most shared content on social media and what holds the most attention on the 24/7 news cycle. Programmers know this. Marketers know this. Politicians know this. You should know this.

As opposed to the catastrophizing we see on 24/7 news and social media, not everything in life involves fight, flight, or freeze. There is also the parasympathetic state of our nervous system. This is the natural action your nervous system takes following a crisis or traumatic event to metabolize fear, trauma and anger. It is a state of calm and connect. It is a state of rest and digest (Vranich).

This is where intelligence functions return to us, and shared perspective becomes possible. Our divisionist leaders and extreme media trolls strive to keep you as far away from this state as possible.

Here is the thing, as the election clamor grows to a deafening pitch, nobody is coming. You must manage your own state and help others, even those in other groups do the same and reach this parasympathetic state of calm and connect. This is where we can get big sh*t done. But, it starts with you.

2. Lead yourself…FIRST!

Humans are mostly energy and leadership is the management of energy. Just like you must put your own oxygen mask on first in an airplane during an emergency, you must also lead yourself first during an election. You must manage your own energy first.

Managing emotional temperature is the name of the game. Fear and anger are great for fighting off grizzly bears, but mostly inappropriate for the civil functions of an election. It makes us stupid.

- You must move your emotional temperature from the sympathetic state of fight, flight or freeze to the parasympathetic state of calm and connect/rest and digest.

Not only does this help you think more clearly about what is really going on, it is the only state that allows you to bridge and connect with others outside your belief group. This is essential for moving on with daily life no matter what results the election brings.

Here are some critical questions to ask yourself when leading yourself first:

• Am I demonstrating contempt to this person or this group right now?
• Am I speaking with moral superiority?
• Am I rigid in my beliefs right now or am I open to different perspectives?
• What can I control in this moment right now?
• What can I not control in this moment right now?
• What good can I put into the world right now that lights me up and serves others?

Adopt a few critical rituals.

Conduct micro recoveries throughout your day. These are simply micro resets, episodic resets where you retune your mind, body and spirit and reset it for the next event. It could be something as simple as dropping and doing 10 push-ups, going for a walk after a Zoom call or three to five belly breaths following an intense engagement.

Reconnect to the natural world. Let's remember that most of our adult life when we are awake is spent in a represented digital realm. It is not the natural world. Something as simple as going outside and going for a walk, sitting in your backyard with your spouse or best friend, going to a ball field and watching your kids play a sport. Put your phone down and plug back into the natural world.

Digital detox. This is something I talk a lot about in my upcoming book Nobody is Coming to Save You. We are being dominated by mobile technology and when AI gets here, it will be even worse. It is up to you to find ways to detox. I recommend every Friday you don't pick up a device until noon. Every other day, you don't pick it up until 10:00. Put your digital devices away one hour before bedtime and at least once a quarter have an entire day where you do not check your devices at all.

3. Bridge the gaps.

Let's face it. No matter how the election turns out, you will still need to sell, grow, influence and lead through massive division. That means you will have to bridge into other belief outgroups, some right inside your own business, community, and family. Here are some tools you can use right now:

Prepare for all your engagements. This is two-thirds of every high stakes engagement, yet no one does it particularly during the election season. I suggest you map out who you are engaging. What are their goals and pain points? What are your goals? What do you think the emotional temperature is with them? What will it take to get them to be ready to listen to what you have to say?

Prepare your instrument (body, voice, and mind) for the engagement. Tension is the enemy in every engagement, whether speaking from the stage or doing a Zoom meeting. Don't let elections or other bullshit add to that tension. Three deep belly breaths before you go into the engagement and say out loud slowly, "I have time." Do this three times as well. You will show up much more focused.

Also, before the engagement ask yourself these questions out loud and answer them out loud. Who am I? Why am I here? What do they need from me?

Listen like your life depends on it. Leadership is the management of energy, yours and those around you. Listening takes energy and intention. Try to see the pictures in the head of the other party (pain and goals). Ask them thoughtful, open-ended questions that let them respond in narrative.

Pure discovery and curiosity should be your intention throughout.

Don't state your political position or make an ask until you have articulated the pictures in their head back to them.

When they say, "That's right," they are ready to listen to what you have to say (Voss).

Ask permission to state your position or to make an ask. This can include even hard conversations on elections, politics, or other contentious issues. It costs you nothing and gets the other party ready to listen to you.

Conclusion. Our leaders want us divided to meet their narrow agenda. That's not how most Americans think. In fact, recent polling by More in Common shows two thirds of Americans (a super majority) are frustrated by the polarized division and exhausted by it. We are hungry to connect. Your clients want to move forward. Your employees want to make an impact. Your neighbor wants to raise their kids and live a good life just like you. Nobody is coming. However, by reading the human operating system, leading yourself first, and bridging connection gaps, you can lead us into better days and get big stuff done.

This approach has worked for me in life and death situations in low trust, tribal Afghanistan, and it will work even better for you in life and death tribal America. Try it and become the most relevant person in the room.

We're counting on you.

I'll see you on the rooftop.

Scott Mann.

About the author: Scott is the author of the upcoming book Nobody is Coming to Save You, a Green Beret's Guide to Getting Big Shit Done, coming out on October 1st, 2024. To pre-order your copy now and join our Get Big Shit Done Movement or to work directly with Scott, go to Scottmann.com .