Navigating Career Change in the Middle of a Sandwich

You want fries with that midlife crisis?

You’ve probably heard of the sandwich generation — that generation of folks who are squeezed between caring for both children and aging parents. But today that sandwich looks a lot more like a Sloppy Joe, threatening to spill all over your good pants. Because today’s middle-aged worker has jammed a few fixings into that sandwich — like an empty nest, or menopause, maybe a divorce or even illness.? Now try to squeeze a job search in there, at a time when you are either not ready to retire or can't afford to not work, and you have a huge mess on your hands.

Elizabeth Chang wrote in “The sandwich generation is changing,” that since Americans are living longer, and many adult children are living at home, the circumstances of middle-age are different and messier. You will need to bring in perspective and focus to handle this Dagwood of a sandwich, maybe a bigger plate and lots of napkins. You are not going to find all the answers in this post, but here are a few practical tips to cut your lunch into some bite-sized pieces.

Grieve the job loss. Acknowledge it’s happening and it hurts. You miss contributing, getting stuff done, and having work banter. Give yourself permission to feel some regret or sadness about not being in that position. You are not complaining, you are not being ungrateful. Practice self-care when needed whether it’s taking a walk outside or binge your new favorite show.? I am sending you this warm fuzzy blanket right now and a pint of ice cream.

It’s not you, you are not the problem.? Depersonalize the issue. It is fall now, as companies start to slow down and look towards next year’s budget to hire. The upcoming elections can drive organizations, particularly those with government contracts or funding, to be cautious about project and staffing commitments. These are real economic market trends that may be impacting you. If you have the financial means to look further out, consider temp, contract and consultation opportunities to tide you over.? Be open to non-traditional paths and let your network know.

Seek Connection. You don’t have to go through this alone. Being out of work for longer than expected will create self-doubt. One way to counter the impact on your confidence is to phone a work friend.? Connect with your prior colleagues, bosses, and trusted advisors. You are not asking them for a job – ask for help with your updated skills inventory. Ask “what did I do really well?” “What would people consistently come to me for?”? “What impact did I have?”? Listen for themes, and don’t be afraid of the ego boost you will get. You need it. You deserve it. TAKE IT. Need to get pumped to make those connections? My go to is to make a Confidence Boost Playlist.

Press the Play button.? My youngest child jokes, why not press meno-play instead of meno-pause. [Insert ?? emoji].? For those of a certain age, they are also on the hormonal rollercoaster of menopause related issues including interrupted sleep and low energy – not exactly the support needed for an invigorating all out search.? Use the energy you do have purposefully. Drive your efforts towards the greatest impact.? Will you do one networking call a week? You do not have to go back to school, but is there a short online certification that will build skills and give you current industry speak at your next interview?? What will you do with that laser focused wisdom you have now?

Be Intentional. ?Author and podcast host Mel Robbins recently had a podcast about how we need to rebrand “empty nest” because it sounds like we are “just sitting around with a sad, empty bowl of birdseed.”? The same is true for “unemployed.” You feel lost in a transition but take Robbins seriously when she says: “time doesn’t change, it’s what you do with that time.” Use that time to check in with yourself, remember what makes you inspired, fulfilled, and in alignment with who you want to be. Write it down. And while you’re at it, write down your values, your strengths, and your work focus. It sounds silly, but it helps. ?

Last tip – consider a consultation with a career coach. As a professional coach, I support clients seeking direction in life and work transitions. Contact me or refer me to someone you know who needs a champion to guide them forward. @www.kabcareercoach.com.