Navigating the 20s: Blooming late in your 20s by Relebogile Mmusi

Having dreams for your future, timelines for when that will take place, milestones you set to reach them but you turn out to have delays in launching.

Sometimes this happens because we’ve experienced a relatively resistance free existence at an early stage. What that does is puts you in a position where you don’t know how to deal with adversity and setbacks that come with life, not recognising red flags for something that is a potential stumbling block in your life, in a way of speaking it’s a lack of street smarts (or it’s a lack of being street smart).

What one doesn’t know when facing lateness in blooming, is you struggle the most because you didn’t know how to handle challenges, failure and change. It overwhelmed me and I struggled. So I stumbled, fumbled and mumbled my way through early adulthood, sometimes permeating into one’s working career.

But, looking back this is what was happening, I want you to be able to recognise if this is what’s happening to you:

• Being smart but not knowing how to work smart
• Being overwhelmed and being consumed by it
• Not speaking up and seeking help (because I didn’t know admitting to failure was even an option, let alone asking for help).
• Procrastination
• Lack of self-awareness (thinking I knew myself but deep work was needed).
• Letting outside factors change who you were at the core.
• Pretending and eventually self-isolating

How I would respond to each challenge above in the same order:

• Being curious. Ask others who have travelled a similar journey as the one you are embarking on. Do your research and remain open-minded, even about failure.
• Take things at face value and not over-analyse.
• Lean on God, pray for your destiny helpers to reach you, be open and vulnerable. Recognise you don’t have all the answers, nor all the strength alone. There are others who can support you.
• Still loading…lol. But what I’ve learned so far- get out of your own way. Don’t be an enemy of progress in your own life.
• Seek counsel. Your elders and lecturers are there and if you can afford it, therapists are there.
• You are more than meets the eye, but you need to protect that. There will be many things that try to distract you from who you are at the core of God’s love, but you have to always remember your truth.
• Allow yourself space to be, whether it looks good or ugly and space to be honest with yourself. You will then feel confident to be you authentically around others, and not a burden.

We’re all blooming, just your own expectations need to adjust to your reality. Nothing is without reach. A dream deferred is still a dream, you just have to give yourself space to continue to strive to fulfil it. Growing forward is the goal.

Written by: Relebogile Mmusi

Edited by: Ms Zinhle Novazi

About the author Relebogile Mmusi : Relebogile Mmusi is an ever curious mind, having carved out a space for herself in the world of marketing, and is passionate about the routes to understanding the consumer thought process and uncovering how to reach them. As a late self proclaimed late bloomer, having faced set backs academically which impacted on her professional journey, she is unlearning self-judgement and practicing grace and kindness to self.

Navigating the Twenties Emma Reinecke Ms Zinhle Novazi

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