The Nativity Play That Shaped My Confidence

The children all sat down on the mat to listen to Mrs Brown, their teacher, who was about to assign parts for the upcoming nativity play. I was six years old and buzzing with excitement, eager to be part of what was, without doubt, the highlight of the infant school year.

Mrs Brown began to tell the story and, as she did, mentioned Mary, Jesus’s mother. My best friend, Annabel, immediately shot her hand into the air and called out, “Miss, my middle name is Mary!”

Thinking I had the upper hand, I raised my own hand and tried to call out, “But Miss, my name is Mary!” But my voice got lost in the chatter, and before I knew it, Mrs Brown smiled and said, “That’s a great coincidence, Annabel. Would you like to be Mary in the play?”

As you can imagine, I was crushed. In that moment, an unconscious decision took root in my mind, one that shaped how I saw myself and the world: I don’t get chosen. I’m second best. The world doesn’t listen to me.

Fast Forward to Adulthood

About 25 years later, I was doing well by many people’s standards. I had a solid career as an executive for a well-known tour operator, good friends, and my own flat in central London. But something gnawed away at me.

I avoided situations where I felt overly visible. I was fantastic at being second in command but reluctant to step into the spotlight.

Looking back, I realise I was a reluctant leader, unsure of my ability to take up space and command attention.

It wasn’t until I began my own leadership journey, peeling back the layers of self-awareness, that I had a profound realisation: as an adult, I was still letting my six-year-old self run the show.

That unconscious decision I’d made in the classroom all those years ago was still shaping my choices, keeping me safely tucked inside my comfort zone.

Lessons from the Six-Year-Old Me

That six-year-old decision wasn’t all bad. It helped me develop qualities like empathy and the ability to let others shine. But it also cast a shadow:

• I struggled to say no, afraid of upsetting others, even at the cost of my own well-being.
• I hesitated to try new things, believing, What’s the point? No one will notice anyway.

These limiting beliefs held me back, but they also taught me something invaluable: awareness is the first step to freedom.

Breaking Free

The turning point came when I realised that the tools to rewrite my story were always within me. By focusing on being present, engaging with my adult self, and stepping outside my ego, I’ve learned to quiet the inner child’s voice that told me I wasn’t good enough.

This journey wasn’t about dismissing the six-year-old me but about acknowledging her, understanding her fears, and gently showing her a new way forward.

Today, I’m passionate about helping others uncover the hidden beliefs that hold them back. Whether it’s the voice that says, I’m not ready, or the one that whispers, I’ll fail if I try, I’ve seen time and again how transformative it is when we recognise these patterns and choose to move beyond them.

Join Me in Exploring Confidence

If my story resonates with you, you’re not alone. Many of us carry hidden beliefs from our past that shape how we show up in the present.

This is exactly why I’ve created my 2025 workshop, Exploding the Confidence Myth. Together, we’ll explore what confidence truly is (and isn’t), uncover the unconscious beliefs that hold us back, and develop practical strategies to step into our authentic power.

It’s not about becoming someone else—it’s about becoming more of who you already are. If you’re ready to rewrite your story and take your leadership to the next level, I’d love for you to join me.

Let’s start this journey together. Just message me for more details.

Wishing you wonderful festive season and a very prosperous New Year.

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