THE NAME GAME & CONSEQUENCES OF OUR CHOICES!

".......the most important anchorage to our self-identity throughout life remains our own name"

--------------Gordon Allport

"Because a name is used to identify an individual and communicate with the individual on a daily basis, it serves as the very basis of one's self-conception, especially in relation to others."

--------------------- David Zhu

My mother named me "Ashu" - a name which she chose as far back as 1950. Apparently, this was a name which found the fancy of a young eleven-year-old, and whenever she would suggest the name for a newborn in the family - it would always be set aside. She was so miffed by the repeated brush-offs, that she decided to keep the name of her choice for someone whose name could be finalised by her. In due course, I came along in 1966 to claim the name - that had been awaiting me since 1950.

Life happened and the name Ashu initially changed to Ajay and subsequently became Gaurav. My juniors and peers in the Army started referring to me (usually behind my back / out of earshot) as "Bhisma Pitamah". The jury is still out on the reasons. Was it my premature greying / loss of hair, my nearly bald pate ringed with a crown of close-cropped white hair, the bushy twirled white moustaches - a la Hercule Poirot or the sagacious (at least I think so) unsolicited advice which I used to go about offering freely (still do) in an unbridled manner. Every time I hear the name "Bhisma Pitamah" I am transported back in time to my three decades - a lifetime really - spent in the Olive Greens.

For most of us, post superannuation, time is often not at a premium and courtesy of the freely available gyaan on the Whatsapp University one is often reminded of long-forgotten mythological stories and allowed to reminisce about this and that - based on the anecdote in question.

It is no secret that two people do not respond to the same situation in a similar way.?Oftentimes the situation being the same the reaction differs vastly. I am reminded of two legendary personalities who were faced with a very similar situation, but their responses were diametrically apart.?

"Bhisma Pitamah" & "Jatayu"

Both, of them, were confronted with character-defining assault on womanhood.?One chose to die protecting the victim' while the other chose to be a mute spectator of the crime.

Hereunder, I present comparative musings, which might be of interest to the reader, especially in today's time and age - when once again issues related to sexual harassment and gender discrimination are steadily on the rise and are being reported from all over the world.

POWERFUL or POWERLESS

Bhisma was a powerful warrior and if he wanted, he could have stopped the disrobing of Draupadi - the Queen but he chose to be a silent witness to this act

Whereas Jatayu was old and invalid and knew that in all probability, Ravana would kill him but still, he chose to try his best to protect Sita - the Queen.?

Bhisma was powerful yet acted powerless whereas Jatayu was powerless yet acted powerfully.

"Real power is not about physical strength but about the deep desire to help."

ALIVE or DEAD

Bhisma lived on but died every day to his conscience whereas Jatayu died once but lived eternally true to his conscience.?

" Our only constant companion is our conscience - better to be true to it."

FAME or INFAMY

Bhisma's name and fame went down in history because of this one act of not stopping the disrobing of Draupadi but Jatayu's name and fame went high in history because of his act of trying to save Sita.?

" We are all going to be mere names in history, sooner or later. Will we be equated with the bad or the good - is our choice."

CULTURE or VULTURE

Bhisma was supposed to be a highly cultured human but acted highly insensitive & stooped low in values like a vulture?

Whereas?

Jatayu was supposed to be a lowly uncultured vulture but acted highly sensitive and soared the skies in value like an evolved human. Who would you call a human - Bhisma or Jatayu??

"One doesn't become a human being by being born as a human - one becomes a human being by being a human."

SPOKEN or UNSPOKEN WORDS

Draupadi begged and pleaded for protection from Bhisma because she knew if someone could protect her it was only him but still Bhisma didn't protect her?

Whereas?

Sita didn't even ask Jatayu for protection - she just wanted him to inform Rama about her kidnapping by Ravana because she knew Jatayu was not powerful but still Jatayu tried to protect Sita.

Bhisma being a human couldn't even understand the spoken words of Draupadi what to speak of understanding her unspoken words whereas Jatayu even though was a mere bird, understood not only the spoken words of Sita but also her unspoken words.

"The language of the heart is more powerful than the language of words."

CLARITY or CONFUSION

Bhisma was confused regarding his Royal duty that he forgot that he had a higher duty - a moral duty

Whereas

Jatayu was so clear about the moral duty that no other duty was a consideration for him.?

"When caught up in dilemmas, best is to follow the higher principles - to follow our heart because it always knows the truth."

GOOD or BAD EXAMPLE

Bhisma set a very bad precedent for generations to come?

Whereas

Jatayu set the most ideal precedent for generations to come.?

"If we can't be a great example at least let us not be a bad one."

RELATIVE or STRANGER

Another interesting point is that Bhisma was an elderly relative of Draupadi but acted like a total stranger in this episode

Whereas

Jatayu was not at all related to Sita, he was a stranger but acted more than a dearest relative.?

"True relationships is based on heartily connections not just bodily connections."

THE SAINTLY or THE WICKED

Both, Bhisma and Jatayu had a few moments to decide what to do. Life sometimes puts us in situations wherein a few moments we need to make crucial decisions.?What we decide very much depends on the kind of inner integrity we have cultivated by the association we keep.?

Bhisma's intelligence was clouded and it failed the test of life because he associated with the wicked-minded, selfish Kauravas whereas Jatayu's intelligence was crystal clear and it passed the test of life because he associated with the saintly, selfless Lakshman and the All-pure Lord Rama.?

"After all, who we are solely depends on whom we associate with."

EMBRACE or NEGLECT

The Supreme Lord Sri Krishna was not at all happy with this attitude of Bhisma so much so that when He came as a peace messenger to Hastinapur, He didn't even bother to look at Bhisma, let alone respect him?

Whereas?

The Supreme Lord Ramachandra was so happy with the attitude of Jatayu that he embraced him and personally did his final rites - an honour that even Dasharath - His father didn't receive.?

The scriptures explain that the ultimate test of any activity is if the Supreme Lord is pleased with us. It is very clear, that Bhisma displeased God whereas Jatayu pleased Him.

Concluding Thoughts

These comparative musings are not meant to criticize Bhisma - he is undoubtedly a great warrior and an amazing personality who sacrificed his personal desires for Hastinapur, but?we do vehemently criticize his inaction. The end here is to learn from the choices made so that we are conscious that history follows us.?

When we see some injustice, some problem, we have only two options - either close your eyes to it or do something about it - follow "the Bhisma way" or "the Jatayu way"?and whichever option we choose, we must remember that there will be consequences of our choices?

“You can't blame anyone else, ... , no one but yourself. You have to make your own choices and live every agonizing day with the consequences of those choices.”

―?Max Brooks

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