The Myth Of Hustle Culture, 3 Questions To Ponder, And One Piece Of Advice Today

Hustle Culture is a myth many of us believe in before we realize the price we're paying is too high.

Excerpt from my book?

October 31, 2013 - Toronto, Canada

I stare at my reflection in the hotel mirror on the morning of Madonna's health club opening. Puffy eyes. Lifeless expression. A ghost of success stares back at me. My fingers trace the dark circles under my eyes as the morning news breaks the silence in the background about another "inspiring" success story.

Last night, I wrote in my journal:

“I want to feel whole. Instead, I'm riddled with holes. I feel drained by the all-consuming “shoulds” and “have-to.” There’s external pressure to always be on, but also the internal hustle in my head. That constant nagging voice to do more. Keep going. Sleep when I’m dead. Instead of the freedom I so desperately wanted, when I started my business, I’ve turned into a cog in the machine. My own worst boss. A slave to a job I created. I’m exhausted. I wonder what would happen if I slowed down, just a little bit.”?

35,000 feet somewhere between Toronto and Reno. The flight attendant hands me a cocktail napkin. With no WiFi on the plane, unable to get distracted with work and more emails, I flip the napkin over and begin to count - not sales figures or social media followers, but the cost of my "success":

Work: 100% | Days since last vacation: 1,095?

Money: 50% | Hours worked last week: 126?

Love: 25% | Missed evenings/weekends last year: 205?

Health: 10% | Doctor's appointments last year: 15?

Play: 0% | Anxiety attacks last month: 4

For years, I've been measuring my worthiness by external measures of success. Society teaches us to measure success through:

• Bank account balance
• Job title
• Promotions
• Social media followers
• Hours worked

I haven't given myself permission to stop. To slow down. To be creative unless somehow it leads to making more money.?

My overachiever external success comes with a price too hefty.?

Trapped in this never-ending hustle cycle, I keep pushing forward. Hustle Culture feeds into our fundamental human desire to be loved, to belong, to matter, to feel safe, to get ahead. It taps into the societal narrative that hard work is the route to success, and that success as measured by external markers is the ultimate measure of a person's value. Social media, corporate narratives, media, and even educational systems reinforce this culture by elevating overwork as a badge of honor. It suggests that with enough effort, one can secure safety, stability, and ultimately happiness. Hustle Culture isn't just a mindset; it's an invisible prison built from society's expectations and our deepest fears.?

It feeds on our primal needs:

• ?The need to belong
• ?The desire to feel worthy
• ?The quest for security?
• The fear of falling behind

The "I'll be happy when..." syndrome takes the following form:?

• Career milestones that feel hollow once achieved?
• Financial goals that only lead to bigger ones?
• Material purchases that bring temporary joy?
• Life achievements that somehow never feel enough

We end up dissatisfied in our current state, overlooking current joys and achievements, and thus creating an imbalance between chasing achievements and present state fulfillment. Understanding our psychology can help us rewire what's not serving us, despite our inherent tendency towards this. Psychologists refer to the "arrival fallacy" not only as an academic concept, but also as a recurring pattern that many of us struggle to break free from. Harvard psychologist Daniel Gilbert's research reveals a startling truth: we are remarkably poor predictors of what will make us happy. For most people, whether they realize it or not, happiness doesn’t come from external achievements but rather from being social and spending time with family and friends.?

As I’ve come to realize, I’ve been counting the wrong things.?

When we shift our metrics from external validation to internal alignment, from quantity to quality, from "more" to "meaningful," we don't just change our measuring stick—we change the game we play. The path to contentment isn't through endless hustle but through intentional harmony.?

Each time we let go of our ego-driven external success metrics and learn to be BE instead of DO, we replace mindless hustling with real living.?

You are not what you achieve. You are not your productivity. You are not your bank balance. You are not your job title. You are a human being worthy of love, rest, and joy—not because of what you do, but because of who you are.?

1 Advice Today

You see countless messages, especially lately (Hello Cyber Monday), telling you that you lack, that you don’t have enough, that you need something else to be happy.?

I ask you not to listen. You are enough the way you are.?

3 Questions to Ponder?

1. What parts of yourself have you sacrificed at the altar of productivity?
2. Where in your life are you running so fast that you've forgotten why you started running?
3. What would your younger self think of how you're measuring success today?

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