MY THOUGHTS ON GETTING LAID OFF AND HOW TO HANDLE IT

Well… Here we go again… This piece is way out of the ordinary from what I would usually share, but with layoffs hitting our industry again, I thought it may be useful. Everyone processes things differently, so please don’t think I’m trying to tell you how to process your emotions, or even worse that I would judge the way you process them. I’m going to tell you my thought process throughout the experience and you can pick and choose what may help you out.

I was laid off from my former employer in February of 2015. I had been watching the industry closely in 2014 and knew it was about to get bumpy. Thanksgiving Day 2014 OPEC made the decision to not curtail production and I knew right away because I had an alert set on my phone for when the meeting was taking place. I made sure that my two brothers that were in the industry and the other one about to enter the industry (his offer ended up being retracted after this) knew what had happened and to be prepared. The drive back to Houston I had a discussion with my girlfriend at the time that my job may not be in Houston in 2015.

Early February 2015 I was supposed to work the booth at the Hydraulic Fracturing Technical Conference (HFTC). The night before I was laid off, I was at my office well after dark trying to catch up on things before the HFTC, and I passed by the office of the engineering manager that managed the team that supported my team. I could tell he was stressed, and I knew he was trying to figure out his layoffs. We chatted briefly about the impending layoffs and I remember saying something along the lines of “surely I’ll make it through the first round”. Boy was I wrong… After I got home my boss sent me a message asking me to meet him at the office at 7:00 before I went to the conference. I thought it was strange, so I asked, “do I need my laptop”. He responded yes, and I knew what was going to happen the next morning.

I stayed up an hour or so later than I usually would have, but I decided worrying about it wouldn’t do any good, so I went to sleep. I went into the office the next morning with my laptop and my cell phone in my hand with my head held high. Sure enough, I was laid off.

I drove home and threw myself a pity party for a few hours until I was tired of hearing myself gripe. At that point, I started reframing my mindset. I believe that this is the hardest thing to do, so get ready to do some soul searching for this part. To this day I still don’t know how or why I was able to do this so quickly over this shocking and life-changing moment. If I were going to present my self an award, it would be for my mental toughness and resilience that day. I try to apply this mindset into all aspects of my life, but I assure you it takes more than a few hours in most cases. That day I was able to shift my mindset very quickly from who, what, when, why, and where was I laid off to “it was an accounting decision, nothing more nothing less”.

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Tip #1 - DON’T TAKE IT PERSONAL

It’s an unfortunate part of our industry, but downturns and layoffs happen – always have, always will. A large, large majority of the layoffs that happen in a downturn have nothing to do with the person, it’s an accounting decision and the sooner you accept that the quicker you’ll recover. If you know it was performance-based, then fix the problem going forward. For me, I had no indication that it was performance-based. I always received good reviews and was (or at least tried to be) the type of person that welcomed constructive criticism. I’m big on self-analysis, so the first thing I did was give myself a performance evaluation and I passed with flying color (maybe hubris is why I moved on so quickly, haha). After that, I evaluated other aspects. Be careful here, this is the step where hate, resentment, and blame is most likely to rear its ugly head. If it wasn’t me, who had it out for me? My boss or my coworkers? Luckily, I was able to get off that destructive path quickly and I realized I had always had a great relationship with my boss and coworkers. Sure, we disagreed on plenty of things along the way, but I think we had mutual respect for each other. I had worked for my boss directly or indirectly a large majority of my career there and they were responsible for the training, opportunities, raises, promotions, and they didn’t mince words, so I always knew if there was an issue. Since it wasn’t performance or someone out to get me, what could it possibly be? That’s where the mindset shift kicked in. My boss was tasked with an impossible decision of choosing someone to lay off from our outstanding team. So, why me? Here are the reasons I started telling myself that I was chosen for lay off:

-       I was one of the only unmarried without kids on the team

-       I was well-connected, so it would be easier for me to land elsewhere

-       I was the most prepared for this. My boss knew I had been paying attention

-       And a variety of other reasons that made it nothing personal

Are any of these reasons true? I have no idea, but it doesn’t matter. It was the positive spin that I placed in my head to help shift my mindset.

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After my pity party was over, I went out for lunch and then went to get a new cell phone since my personal one was on the brink and barely functioning. Then I started developing a game plan. Day 2 of HFTC was the next day and my former employer had already bought my ticket, so that was the start. I went to Staples that afternoon and got some business cards made for the event. These beauties here:

I wanted them to be a mini resume and something that stood out. Based on the feedback I got - mission accomplished. The first thing I did when I got to the show was pick up my badge, cross out my former employer and write “for hire” as big as I could over it. I went around the show networking and catching up with my contacts. I didn’t have a sad story or anything to say about my former company or colleagues to tell anyone though. When people asked what happened or why I was laid off, in most cases I simply responded with something along the lines of “it happens in a downturn”. Of course, I asked people if they were hiring and no one was. Most of them responded with I’m sorry, but we’re laying off too. I said I fully understand but if anything changed please keep me in mind and let me know.

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Tip #2 – KEEP YOUR HEAD HIGH AND DO SOMETHING BOLD

Bold thing #1 – I showed up to the HFTC. I had a lot of people at the show tell me that they couldn’t believe I was there a day after I was laid off.

Bold thing #2 – The business cards that looked like a mini resume. People seem to think business cards are hard and/or expensive to create, but they are super simple and cheap. With zero design background, you can spend a half-hour and less than $30 to get them made at most office stores. I was given the advice to create business cards in college. The logic being that people meet too many people at any event to remember all of them, and most students don’t have business cards. When they finally get home that night and empty their pockets – Boom! There’s your business card and they remember you.

Bold thing #3 – This is a little blunt, but I don’t know how else to say it. Keep your sad story and your badmouthing to yourself. In a time when people are already overwhelmed with negativity, they don’t want to hear yours. They have their own concerns like how much longer they will have their job. They already know you’re going through a tough time after you were laid off and in most cases are empathetic, but they’ll remember your positive attitude.

I make it to the HFTC every year, and in the last five years, someone has always remembered these things. In 2016 there were a lot of people that remembered. This year, five years afterward, I had two people remember in random conversation. I was speaking with these people and we knew that we knew each other but couldn’t really remember how. In the middle of the conversation a lightbulb went off and they were like, “Hey, are you that guy that scratched out your former employer on your name badge to let everyone know you were looking”? Yep, that was me.

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Because I had a decent idea that I was going to be laid off the night before I was able to save all my pictures and personal items from my work phone and work computer. But I forgot one critical thing – my contacts. I had to start rebuilding my contacts from scratch. I had a LinkedIn account, but nothing significant on there and very few connections. I thought LinkedIn was a joke and a waste of time before then, but now it’s one of the most powerful tools in my arsenal.

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Tip #3 – NETWORK

I was very fortunate to get to bounce around all over the place with my former employer, so I always had a strong network within the company. Realistically, my strong network outside of them was my former colleagues (luckily, there were a lot of them and they went far and wide). I’m not sure when I realized this, but I had made a HUGE mistake in taking my work and competitiveness too seriously. Anyone that was at a company that competed with mine, I considered a competitor and I kept them at arm’s length. If you haven’t experienced it firsthand, the statement of your “network is your net worth” is very accurate. Build your network up and have meaningful conversations that are mutually beneficial. Don’t share confidential information, but any good relationship requires sharing info that mutually beneficial. If you become a leech that is always looking for info but never sharing, people will avoid you like the plague (or coronavirus). Before I went out on my own my intracompany networking was strong, but my external needed drastic improvement. That was one of the first things I went to work on.

If you’re an introvert and don’t like crowds, don’t let this hold you back. I’m an ambivert that doesn’t particularly like crowds either, and I don’t find that speed-dating-type networking that useful anyway. In my opinion, real relationship building happens in smaller groups. I do recommend going to at least a few large events and be social enough to get business cards so you can invite them to lunch or coffee afterward. If that terrifies you though, it is certainly not a requirement. Reach out to individuals on LinkedIn and invite them to lunch or coffee.

Growing my network and relationships has been one of the most critical aspects of going out on my own. There have been two periods of 6+ months that were extremely slow for me and I started wondering if it was time to rejoin the corporate world. Because I kept networking and planting seeds through these periods, I was able to recover.

Whether you’re looking for a job or going on your own, it’s important to remind people that you are out there and what your skillset is.

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After I did my soul searching and game-planning, I decided to go out on my own. I had always wanted to have my own business but never knew what to do. I had been teaching classes and doing consulting for my former employer for many years, so why couldn’t I do it on my own.

In 2013 I was scheduled to teach one of my courses for at a conference in Houston. An operator in Midland had a 30-person team they wanted to take this course, but it gets real time-consuming and expensive quick to send that size team to Houston. They reached out to their sales rep, and he reached out to me. A few weeks later I was in Midland teaching that course for them in-house. I thought back on this story and a lightbulb went off – there was my business idea.

A good friend of mine had just finished his MBA at Rice University and let me borrow a book called The Essentials of Entrepreneurship (unfortunately this is not a published book for the general public). I read this textbook cover to cover in less than a week, but it was decided that I would start my own business after chapter 1. Chapter 1 covered something along the lines of when is the right time to start a business. I analyzed my situation and decided it was now or never.

I started plotting and scheming, and a few weeks later my business was born. During this process, the final and most important piece of me recovering from any remaining bitterness from my lay off – gratitude.

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Tip #4 – GRATITUDE

As I evaluated my situation and decided it was the right time, a fantastic reality hit me. The only reason I was prepared to start a business was the knowledge I had gained from all my great colleagues that I had the pleasure to work with over the years. I was financially stable because of my former employer. I had been given the opportunity to network, write papers, travel the world, make presentations, and many other opportunities because of my former employer and colleagues.

The moment I had that realization, it was impossible to have resentment and I haven’t had anything but gratitude for my former employer and colleagues ever since.

For some reason, people seem to think that I resent the corporate world and my former employer because I’ve been on my own for so long. That’s simply not the case. I have a vision for what I want to do with my business and I’m having fun (most of the time), so I want to see it through. The way I see it, I can always go back to the corporate world (including my former employer).  

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I’m not going to lie to you and say that getting laid off or starting your own business is easy, but you can do both. Sometimes our minds betray us in this situation, so I want to be sure that I leave you with one final tip. Don’t underestimate your value and the value of your intellectual property!

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Tip #5 – DON’T UNDERESTIMATE YOUR VALUE AND THE VALUE OF YOUR INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY

First and foremost, I am not a lawyer. This section is meant for you to identify when you need to protect your intellectual property (IP) and learn more about it and/or get an IP lawyer involved.

Unfortunately, I have seen vultures come out in these situations. They target people who are desperate and don’t know much about IP. It doesn’t have to be vultures though. It’s pretty standard that most contracts include IP clauses. I’m here to tell you that contracts can be changed, and it happens frequently.

I was fortunate to know enough about this matter (thanks to my former employer again) to know when I needed to protect myself. One of the biggest projects that I’ve done on my own was a report that involved a lot of my training material. We had negotiated the price and about to sign the contract when I realized that I would have to surrender my copyright under the current contract. I desperately needed and wanted this work, but surrendering my copyright was a no go. I decided that I was willing to walk away from this project if I didn’t retain my copyright, and I went to their office the next day and explained the situation. It took some explaining and convincing, but they agreed, and I got a lawyer involved to make sure I protected my IP.

To this day, I do not work on projects that require me to surrender my IP. That’s also why I haven’t published an industry paperS since I’ve been on my own – most of them require you to surrender copyright. Before anyone responds to tell me, “don’t worry about that, they never enforce it”, don’t waste your time. That’s even more of a reason for me not to sign a contract, it’s nonsense.

Protect your IP at all costs! It is valuable, otherwise, no one would want it. Don’t create content for someone where they pay you a minimal fee and they continue to profit from your work for years to come. Be very careful if you lock into an exclusive agreement with a company, but if you do I would recommend that you have a clause that allows you to break the exclusivity if certain metrics aren’t met. If you are not comfortable with a contract, trust your gut and don’t sign it. There are plenty of ways to make money and you should walk away if that contract is not mutually beneficial for both parties.