My team is not my family

One of my corporate friends introduced his team the other day  saying, “ Meet my family”. I have heard it before and every time I hear it, I question myself why  can’t I think that sweet. Am I  a lesser  “leader” simply incapable of thinking the “familiar way”?

Is it because of the guilty feeling I still carry inside, when at some point in my career I had to fire my team members, very much unlike a brother would do so to his siblings?

Is it because I have a job that requires me to rate my team members and put them on a bell curve, unlike a father who would rate his kids and buy gifts based on quarterly performance? Is it because I  can't imagine putting my family members on probation before I ask them to stay  permanently at home?

Then, giving myself a benefit of doubt, I thought, maybe , I choose professional honesty over looking good. The day I sign-off from my corporate career, I would rather ask this question to the team that has worked with me over the years .But meanwhile, if not family, then how do I treat my team as? I need to find an honest answer.

At workplace, people from various backgrounds, capabilities, and aspirations come together to achieve a specific purpose within a limited time. I consider this situation more similar to the environment of sports (not a battlefield, though). The purpose defines the relationship, or rather the intensity of the relationship between the team members. It is true that in happy times, when things are going well, it is easier for a leader to act more like a brother, friend or a guardian. But what happens when the team performance drops, business goals are not met and the pressure to cut cost looms large? How does one change from a friendly brother to a firing manager overnight?

I believe the job of an honest leader to set the right expectation to the team members, from day one that we are not family.

Your team accepts straight talk; they appreciate truth and reality better than most leaders think. Leadership is not a popularity contest. It is more about doing the right thing, in the right way and setting the right expectation with all the stakeholders.

Before the funds dry up, and the parties get over, an honest leader should begin this much needed dialogue with the team. We are here together to reach our shared goal. We support each other as fellow sportsmen do in the playing field. We hug each other and show our love when we score goals (reach milestones). We pick each other up, when one of us fall down. We treat each other with respect , dignity and fairness. We have a lot of fun on the ground and off it. But, still, we are not family. Trust me, your team can take it.