My struggle is real. But it pales in comparison.
For those that know me, you know I hate to lose. So it should come at no surprise that in the midst of a weight loss competition, I am riding my bike 9 miles to work this morning! I really DON'T like exercise, but trying to lose 25 pounds in 3 months is HARD and when I already don't drink alcohol or soda - the only solution is to work hard. When I stepped on the scale this morning and saw +2.5 pounds since Thursday - I was pissed! Starting off the day with this edge of anger just added to my list of unaccomplishments from the previous week. As I am riding, I am thinking and overthinking about everything that I didn't complete last week. The deals that didn't get "done", the customer that didn't get signed, the distributor that didn't come to the table, the employee that didn't get hired, the pounds that didn't get lost. My mind is like a washing machine, churning through these unaccomplishments.
For the first mile or so, I am peddling hard. I am fueled by the desire to shed the extra pounds tacked on over the weekend. I am thinking about my ride to work on Friday where I took it easy and was just going for a "ride". Then that gets me asking myself: "were you just along for the ride all last week?" I had so much anticipation heading into last week. Throttle Muscle has a great program rolling out for the Jiffy Lube MDA push in August that I thought for sure would be a hit with potential customers and distributors, I had great intentions of coming up with a new pricing structure for our Jiffy Lube stores, I was hopeful for coming to an agreement on an alliance with one of our friendly competitors that would bring value to our Throttle Muscle offering and Jiffy Lube stores and I was hopeful of hiring a new member for our Jiffy Lube team. Progress? Yes. Done deals? No. For an impatient deal maker, the week was not a success. So as I peddled, I broke it down.
Was I along for a "ride" or was I peddling hard all week? Why didn't we land a new customer at Throttle Muscle that I have been working on for weeks? Why didn't we get a new distributor to jump at our new pricing and promotion? As I am pondering this, I cross over the bridge from Nipomo into Santa Maria, riding along the freeway. I feel like I am peddling so fast and yet cars are zipping by me like I am standing still. It is a great analogy in my mind. It is like the past four years of owning this startup. I have invested money. I have invested time. I have invested a lot of heart and soul. I am not a salesman. This is not my "day" job. We have great products, great pricing, a great charitable cause and a LOT of potential. But just like the cars are zipping by me like I am standing still, years keep flying by and we are still peddling hard but not gaining traction. I don't know the solution and this eats at me. It eats at me every day. I feel like I don't exhale until I get over the bridge, it's like a relief and I can just move on.
I start riding along the "river bed" and decide to move on in my mind. I started thinking about the pricing change we need to make at Jiffy Lube and how I intended to come up with a new pricing structure and package menus for our stores. I ask myself again, "why didn't that get done?" What was I waiting for? Costs of doing business continue to rise, profitability continues to vanish. This isn't a hard formula. Oh yes, I remind myself I was waiting for a product picture from one of our vendors to be able to put the menu together. Why was I waiting on that? I am impatient. When I make a decision, I make it. I can't turn my mind off. I should have just plugged in my headphones before I left. I feel like I am not moving. The struggle is real.
I turn onto Blosser and ride for a mile or so when I get a new, more pleasant smell in the air. (if you know Santa Maria - you know the nickname is Santa Manure because it generally stinks). But this new smell is better it is the fresh water smell watering a field. I look over and the sprinklers are going in the strawberry fields. The smell is fresh and good. Then I gaze further ahead and see the workers in the next field picking. There is probably fifty or so workers out harvesting the strawberries. They are working hard, as usual. Running with their full boxes, running back with empties, bending over, picking, filling, repeat. I stop peddling. I start to coast. I come to a stop and watch. I see no one complaining. I see no one stopping for a break. I see no one yelling orders. I see no one being a boss. I see workers working hard. I have always had an appreciation for those that harvest our food. The laborers that make it happen. Watching today, for a brief moment, brought back my perspective. THAT struggle is real. My struggle pales in comparison.
I am not going to turn this into a political post. I am not going to add my opinion to all the others that are already out there about this or that. But for the moment, things became clear to me. WE all struggle. Our struggles are different. But, we all struggle. As I continue the struggle today, I remind myself that I am not alone. It's a new week. Time to get shit done.