My Struggle With the "American Ego"
The Spring 2017 Semester just started a couple weeks ago and with it came a new string of classes to study for. While most professors start their first class with an introductory lesson on the syllabus and course guidelines, one of my classes started with quite a different lesson. As my fellow students and I walked into my Entertainment Entrepreneurship class, we noticed a table filled with coffee and tea, enough to feed the whole class. As soon as the class had officially started, the professor instructed anyone who wanted to go grab themselves a drink and sit back down.
After I had gotten my tea, he began by saying that there were two phrases that we will always hear if we go into entertainment:
"Go get me some coffee" and "Can I get you some coffee?"
He instructed us to strive to be the one demanding the coffee more than the one asking for it. And while the concept of being sought after in the business world isn’t particularly new or innovative, I was struck by the theatrics of the lesson. When I turned to one of my international student friends (from a European country), she commented “Only in America!” and it prompted me to question what type of personality does it take to make it the competitive business environment in America vs. other countries.
I’m Not the Only One
In a presentation by George Washington University for their international students, the professors labeled American negotiating style with "’Get the job done quick’ mentality" where "Time is money" and you are expected to “Take a risk”. As one of the most capitalistic countries in the world, its easy to understand why the confident, risk-taking, and often perceived as egotistical personality would thrive in the U.S. Much of the country's success has been based on Americans’ willingness to go into entrepreneurship.
In an interview with Bryan Kramer titled “Gary Vaynerchuk and the Profound Power of Ego”, notorious serial entrepreneur and self-proclaimed “hustler”, Gary Vaynerchuk had the following to say regarding his ego:
“I’m equally grateful in deploying humility as I am in deploying enormous ego, which I think creates a balance and allows me to be palpable and not obnoxious. But I would be lying if I didn’t say I have ego and bravado and confidence. I do think it’s an enormously important factor to my success.”
Many entrepreneurs have echoed this same mentality. But what really determines whether someone, or in this case an entire nation of people, are being egotistical in the business context?
It's All Relative to the Person Next to You
Part of the study of linguistics points to this idea that we can learn culture through our different languages. One of the first examples that made me realize that Americans may be considered egotistical relative to other cultures is through the comparison of complimenting cultures between Americans and Chinese people. While the classic response to a compliment in the U.S. is “thank you”, there are actual lessons for those studying mandarin to learn the proper ways to deflect a compliment that align with traditional Chinese culture. Many cultures feel similarly about compliments. Deflecting them as a sign of humility before considering to accept them as a simple "thank you" in their culture is often times considered boastful or too accepting of praise.
But like every aspect of culture, the context is everything. And while my initial shock of my professor’s lesson made me frustrated with the aggressiveness that Americans take when trying to make a mark in a particular industry, it is one aspect of a culture whose complex characteristics make it almost impossible to compare to others. There is an infinite list of qualifiers that could be brought up in a debate over whether American business culture cultivates a larger ego than another country's. But for now, I will continue to struggle with this concept of an “American ego” and whether it will be required of my classmates and me.
This post was a part of the #StudentVoices series on LinkedIn. Follow #StudentVoices here or write your own.
I am of UK stock but for reasons of history have more US family than UK. Hence my wanting to add to this without bias and with experience. I totally relate to the US cultural idea of getting things done, regardless of outcomes, including the automation of all human work, the inevitability that tech is a future good, and that crushing Iraq was good for democracy. This brings me to a parable. One exalting yet decrying the American sense of self. If two Americans had been at the crucifiction, they would (without doubt) have been the only people rushing to help Jesus. The thing is; they would have removed the nails from his hands first. Hence the intent is well meant, but the action decided upon lacks proper thought. Which takes us back to your idea of context and how we relate to one another with respect and dignity .....
Empowering others begins with internal cultivation.
6 年How are we to treat others? Ramana Maharshi, "There are no others". What is meant by "Americans^? There are Americans that are shallow and narcissistic in power, some that have a hierarchical mentality but there are also those in power that are mindful to create respectful cohesion, knowing everyone's voice has value; their egos practice confidence over conceit. As you pursue your questioning, balance who and how you investigate in order to stay balanced in your findings, as well. I hope your outcome will find more of the latter.
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6 年Wonderfully insightful I'd love to see a comparison study between the American and Irish ego
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6 年Great article Natalie. I would have had the same reaction to the professor’s lesson as you. In my opinion, Ego and Confidence are at opposite ends of a spectrum. The ability to discern between which side of the spectrum from which to work, based on your audience, is the critical skill to navigate the business world and win over people. In the long run, as you said in a recent article with Fabio Marrama, humility will win over more than ego. This is because, at the end of the day, we all want to feel like we are valued. Offering humility to others delivers this.
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6 年Interesting! I have never perceived Americans in the work environment or business world such as successful entrepreneurs as such (especially compared to German entrepreneurs who have achieved success). Confidence (paired with humility and humor) is actually a sign of a balanced person IMO. Some cultures may feel threatened by and interpret confidence as a sign of boastfulness. I always stress how much I adore the humble attitude high achieving Americans have. Maybe I was lucky, maybe Cali is different. Great article to ponder upon. And btw I believe your prof is stuck in the past world. That entire top down mentality and viewing everything as a peck order is so cringe worthy - who cares who serves the coffee? My respect rather grows for leaders who still have this caring attitude ???