My Story - From Darkness to Light

My Story - From Darkness to Light

In late 1993, I suffered a nervous breakdown. I was driving home one November evening after a long day at University and, out of nowhere, I suffered a panic attack. It was so powerful, I can still remember the effect it had on me. Luckily, I wasn’t far from home because I was hyperventilating and struggling to breathe. It scared the hell out of me and shattered what little confidence I already had.

If I’m honest, I wasn’t happy. I was doing a degree in electronics I really wasn’t enjoying, I was struggling financially and, personally, I had low self esteem. I wasn’t a positive thinker by any means and I was always tired, ill and run down. 

Following this initial panic attack, I suffered a dark depression for six months to a year and was left with anxiety for most of my life. 

Before this, I must have been a believer in alternative methods of wellness because I turned to meditation tapes and refused to take the Prozac my doctor prescribed. In fact, I took it for a week before deciding it left me feeling numb and drowsy. I wanted nothing to do with it!

I learned many meditation techniques from tapes and books. One of my favourite books was ‘Shakti Gawain’s Creative Visualisation’. Using the meditation techniques from the book along with others, I eventually overcame the depression. But it wasn’t easy! I found it hard to close my eyes at that time without a feeling of panic building inside me. All I could imagine and feel was a black and hopeless life. It was something I had to persevere with every day for more than a year.

I eventually started to feel more positive and began to read more and more self development books. Anything I wanted to know or learn about, I bought a book for it. Back then, there were virtually no books on panic attacks and few on meditation. Plus there was no Amazon so looking for these kind of things wasn’t easy. But I did find some great companies that promoted spiritual and natural healing and I used them for a while through postal delivery. New World Music was one of those wonderful companies. When CD’s and the internet came along, more and more information on this became easier to find.

The anxiety attacks, however, never left me. They were like this annoying ‘Cable Guy’ that kept coming back. Taunting, haunting and stalking me! I was so determined to beat them, I kept searching for that magic pill, so to speak. Eventually, I found some great techniques that I use to this day and, along with a positive mindset, I can now cope with the attacks. I’m not totally free of them, but I am in control and the main thing is, they don’t scare me anymore.

Eventually graduating from Cardiff University, I fell into a career as an electronic technician that would last for more than ten years. In 2005, I decided it was time to follow a different career path and I quit my job. I wanted to be a writer but I also had an ambition to have my own business. I spent that year working part time in a fish and chip shop until I decided what I wanted to do.

Karate was a constant in my life since I was 15 years old. I began training in Barry Leisure Centre in January 1986. Karate was the one thing that also helped get me through the depression and anxiety. Apart from teaching me to defend myself and build my confidence, it taught me that exercise and leading an active lifestyle was important to the wellbeing of a person. 

I also loved the spiritual aspect of karate along with the stretching warm up we always did at my club. These additional benefits are what I’ve made a regular part of my life today! 

In late 2006, I decided to start my own karate organisation which has now grown to a student base of 150+. Although the business is successful right now, it took some years to make any money and a significant profit. There were many a time I went to teach and no one turned up! I had to do part time jobs around this for a few years and I struggled financially. On many occasions, I felt like quitting especially on the days the bank wouldn’t leave me alone.

Cut a long story short, I was blessed to have a supportive family around me and I kept working hard. Eventually, I built the school now known as Kansei Karate School. It’s a job I absolutely love and am so grateful to those who have been a part of this journey.

Meditation and Yoga are two elements of wellness that have certainly kept me fit and able to train with few real injuries over the years. Having suffered many a trapped nerve (in my back and neck) in my late twenties, I learned that using an osteopath and massage therapist helped prevent those type of problems. So I made them a regular aspect of my wellness too.

The final part of the jigsaw came in early 2007 when I saw a business card about an opportunity I could do alongside my business. It was just after I began the karate business and had to still do other jobs to make ends meet. I called the number and it turned out to be a global nutrition company called Herbalife Nutrition. It took me a few weeks to decide whether to go ahead with this because I was sceptical and apprehensive. Could I manage two businesses at once, was this a legal business and were the products any good were a few questions I kept asking myself.

I finally decided to take the plunge and try the products for myself to see if they worked. What happened next, was life changing!

Before, I was always tired, ill, run down and kept getting colds. I couldn’t train as often as I wanted to and this held me back. Being a karate (kata) competitor, I was frustrated because I couldn’t do as well as I wanted to.

Once I started on a few of the products, I soon realised that I was missing something because I began to feel a lot better. I believed in nutrition before joining the company because I read books on the subject and I took supplements like garlic, vitamin C, fish oils and glucosamine (this definitely worked with regards to my hip pain as a martial artist and years of kicking). But I wasn’t aware of things like protein being an important part of one’s diet and drinking more water.

The company taught me how to eat better and, as an athlete, to eat more protein and nutrition. So, once I began to make these key changes, I found I could train more often I got ill a lot less and was always full of energy. 

I began to win some prestigious titles in Kata competition including European, British and Welsh and continue to compete to this day aged 50. Kata is one of my passions and I train daily to keep my fitness up and my competitive fitness in particular. 

So now, I am not only extremely passionate about karate but also the Herbalife opportunity that enables me to change other people’s lives too. If someone wants to lose or gain weight, I can help them. If they want to improve their sports performance, I can help them. If they want to earn an extra income, I can help them. It’s win win and it’s why I get up in the morning!

I also publish regular Kata-Improving workouts on social media (Passion For Kata) and have a YouTube Channel to go with it (KataExpert). 

At the age of 50, I feel fitter than ever and I have a real purpose in life!

If you need any advice about anything, please do not hesitate to contact me through my email or here on Linked In messenger.