To My Soulmate

A warm feeling ensued when I first saw a couple holding hands and smiling at each other.?

They seemed to be lost in one another.

I must have been 7.?

Clueless, I thought, why were they both seeing each other like that??

As I grew older and wiser, many things came to light.?

The rush of emotions, a beating heart that refused to wait, and the ultimate bliss of falling in love with someone.?

While head over heels was a phase that seemed bizarre, I experienced it, lived it,? conquered it, and lost it not once, but three times.?

It took me a lot of soul-searching, messed-up nights, and tons of puzzles to figure out what was probably wrong.?

Gradually, I changed gears and came to terms with a reality that I chose to hide from myself.?

It was simple- I was scared.?

Scared of losing it all again, feeling stupid and shamed in the name of love, listening to taunts, and then again being conveniently deprived of it as per the other person’s whims and fancies.?

A lot changed and I had to face these hidden fears.?

Did my pain melt away in one day? No

Am I liberated, healed to the core, and have an open heart now? A big Yess!!!

The only answer to the question of how to pay homage to the pangs of a yearning heart was crystal clear- To say, “I am enough and I will improve each day”

No person good or bad, angry or calm, or any other combination will define my self-worth.?

I have full control over my destiny and I will continue to shower myself with love each day.?

It may not be a grand gesture- simple things like replacing a cold drink with coconut water will suffice.?

Because the love that I hold now for anyone who will come into my life comes from a filled cup and is based on foundations of self-love.?

The one which was based on insecurities, helplessness, and abandonment issues, is long dead and I no longer water the bygones.?

I happily welcome the one who will be accepting of my raw, unfiltered, and unadulterated love.?

One not accepting of it can choose his path.?

While I may not fit your checklist in the first go, I will surely listen to all your stories, fears, and insecurities with 0 judgment.?

And, I promise with my soul, there will be a day sooner or later, that my love will make you fall in love with yourself.?

I don’t know what makes me say this.?

Let’s just say, it is a faith that has continued to grow over the years and will soar leaps and bounds in the next decades to come.?