My Sabbatical Journey: Coping with Changes and Uncertainty

The following is an excerpt from the book The Art of The Sabbatical by Cady North, which is available now on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and beyond. The text has been lightly edited for change in pronouns to make sense in this format.

As if taking a sabbatical wasn’t radical enough, many folks find that once they’re on sabbatical, life continues to happen. Sometimes, life involves big changes with health, family, or friends, which can affect previous plans. You might even get a job offer you weren’t expecting.

For Cady North, the sabbatical itself was the big change. After she finished her MBA, the natural thing to do would have been to parlay that into a new role at work or take on more or different responsibilities. Her partner (now spouse) and her were planning to move to New York for her job, since her team was based there. They visited different neighborhoods and narrowed down a few to our shortlist. They had already started thinking about the timing for selling her condo, move dates, and everything in between. Deciding at the last minute to leave her job scribbled all over those plans.

But with one plan dismantled, having a clean slate to work from as she decided my next steps was just what she needed. The fact that she switched courses so quickly meant she had no choice but to stay present and be okay with the unplanned. This was a big lesson she had to learn anyway, since she loved being in complete control of my life. The desire to control prevents a lot of people from taking a sabbatical. It’s a time of life when we’re explicitly not supposed to have everything planned. That’s anxiety-inducing.

Despite best-laid intentions, no sabbatical plan survives exactly as you envisioned. Life won’t stop happening just because you’re on sabbatical, and we can’t control all aspects of our lives while taking time off. Sometimes tragic or scary things happen, or sometimes there will be mundane detours. I don’t share this to scare you or turn you off from taking a work break. Instead, she shares this warning to help you prepare—because, for some people, knowing more about what could happen helps calm the anxiety.

Research by the American Psychological Association backs this up: most people say uncertainty is stressful. You can teach yourself to be more resilient in the face of uncertainty when you accept that changes are the only certain thing in life. Additionally, the APA suggests being patient and kind with yourself and avoiding hyper-focusing on negative events.

The truth is, uncertainty and life changes can happen while we’re working, too. Your sabbatical could have tumultuous, confusing, or scary moments, but focus on the bigger picture: It’s the gateway to a thriving life and career.

Curveballs and Adaptation

Amy J. Wilson knows firsthand that not everything goes according to plan. Sometimes, nothing does. For her, embracing her sabbatical ultimately meant rolling with the punches and giving herself the grace to grow from her experience. “It was time for me to take a moment to breathe. I decided to take a sabbatical and spend some time traveling,” she said. “I called it my eat, pray, self-love tour.”

She was struggling to find her identity after losing her high-profile White House job due to funding cuts. A years-long cycle of burnout had eaten away at her mental health, and a break was the best way to get her nervous system back to normalcy.

Three months into her work break, she was in Bangkok, Thailand, when she got an unexpected call.

Her mom was on the other end of the phone at 4:00 a.m. East Coast time and said, “Your dad hit his head, and things aren’t looking good. He’s in the hospital on life support.” Amy had to rush to the airport and, a day later, found herself back in Baltimore. Grateful for the time off to be with her family during her father’s last days and to help plan the funeral, it was a whirlwind.

She was already grieving the loss of her work identity, and now the loss of her father. At first, she struggled with acceptance. She had gone from working round the clock to dealing with a personal tragedy without much time in between. She didn’t even get to finish her trip. But then, with a little help, she began to focus her efforts.

Amy reflected to me over a video call one evening, “I’m glad I have this time, so I can actually sit and be with my feelings instead of always doing and producing.” A life coach and therapist helped her process everything. Her goal was to get to a place where “existing as a person was enough.”

While she could’ve done the “normal thing” and found a new job after an acceptable amount of time to grieve, she knew she needed more time. She had done enough work on herself to stand firm when she got a call from a friend trying to recruit her into yet another prestigious role. “I’ve got to get over this burnout, or I’m going to be no good to you,” she said.

So, she continued with her sabbatical, having saved more than $100,000 to cover her personal expenses for multiple years. As part of her processing, she started writing a book on empathy. “The book writing process led me to find my purpose.” It would end up creating the building blocks for what would come next in her career.

Upon turning in a draft at the end of the first year of her work break, she found out she was accepted to a three-month, fast-paced technology policy fellowship in San Francisco. Just when she thought she had made a plan that would stick, COVID-19 hit.

With the threat of being unable to travel looming, she made a quick decision to fly back home. “I moved back in with my mom to my childhood home; the home that my father built.” The change brought up a lot of memories, including sad ones, and it was challenging for both her and her mom to coexist there during a global health crisis. Finding full-time work soon wasn’t likely, so she cherished her financial flexibility.

Architecting a New Life

Amy learned from the surprises that happened along the way. Her experiences helped her focus on healing old wounds and discovering what she wants in her career.

The measure of a “successful sabbatical” is relative. Some people will set specific goals, like studying a new subject or working toward a degree. For Amy, it was a journey of self-discovery, not achievement. Eventually, Amy returned to work on her terms, balancing part-time work with editing and finalizing her book, Empathy for Change, published in 2021.

A major self-discovery happened after examining how workaholism kept appearing as a pattern in her life. While her roles were prestigious and she was outwardly successful, “I always chose really terrible jobs for myself,” she said. She worked all the time for approval, but never quite got enough. Amy summed this up perfectly in a line from her book: “I measured my value by what I created, and when that thing ceased to exist, so did my perceived value.” You’re not immune to debilitating burnout just because you’re good at your job—in fact, it probably makes you more prone to burnout.

She worked hard to stop this cycle dead in its tracks.

Today, she’s created more of a “portfolio career” where she takes on projects and work as they come and when they align with her values. As an author and thought leader, she focuses on coaching people to lead with more empathy so they can better manage the realities of the modern workforce. She’s always collaborating with others and experimenting with new projects. It’s been an undertaking to learn to live with uncertainty and ambiguity, trusting that the next project and paycheck will come by attracting the right clients. So far, five years in, it’s worked.

Amy reflects on her experiences in the opening chapters of her book, released shortly after the January 6 attack on the US Capitol: “I personally believe that the way we’re living today is unmanageable, and we as a society need to change our behaviors and values to shift towards empathy for ourselves—but also for the bigger world.” She only had time for such wise reflection by persevering through all these life changes and learning to trust her intuition.

Uncertainty doesn’t scare her as much anymore.

You can write your own story and architect how you want your life to look post-sabbatical. It’s okay if it’s an ever-evolving set of plans.

Another Surprise

Want a job offer? Announce your sabbatical and tell people what you’re up to.

Among the people I interviewed for this book, many shared that as soon as they announced their sabbatical, they received job opportunities from their network. After laying out a careful plan for your work break, it may not be as welcome as you think.

Amy got an unexpected job offer she turned down because she knew she needed to heal more from burnout. Kristen got an immediate job offer when she announced her sabbatical, and she asked them to hold it for her. Countless others got a job offer and agonized over the decision.

While tempting to accept, this could throw a big splash of dirty water on your beautifully painted sabbatical canvas. It might cause you to question whether to continue with your sabbatical or take the sure thing. It’s worth preparing for what you might say if you receive a job offer after announcing your sabbatical. For instance, “Thank you for thinking of me. I will be open to discussing this opportunity in a few months.”

You can’t plan for every contingency, but you can plan for something unexpected to arise. One person I spoke with had an injury shortly into their sabbatical, and they ended up having to focus on physical therapy rather than what they had planned. Another sabbatical-taker’s spouse lost their job one month after she started her work break.

Events like this can be devastating for someone, whether they are employed or not. But it’s a reminder to maintain an emergency fund, even while on sabbatical. You shouldn’t use up your entire cash cushion just so you can take time off. Surprises happen, so it’s wise to expect the unexpected and make a financial contingency plan (i.e., your emergency fund). Continuing your disability and life insurance coverage during your sabbatical is also sound risk mitigation. Don’t let this curveball strike you out, especially if you have dependents.

If you’ve done the work to plan ahead financially, I encourage you to continue with your work break despite unexpected job offers or surprise life events. The choice to reenter the workforce needs to happen on your terms and reflect what you had the chance to learn during your time away. Whether or not you encountered curveballs on your sabbatical, it’s a good idea to:

• Grieve what you lost or left behind in your previous role(s).
• Accept there’s change coming.
• Know that what you thought might not be what happens, and that’s okay.
• Remember, life happens whether you’re on sabbatical or not.

Once your sabbatical feels complete, you’ll need to start a job hunt in earnest, and that’s what we will discuss in the next chapter. It will help smooth over some of the less savory aspects of the job hunt by getting you in the mood to think about how to tell your own story.

Questions for Reflection

• What fears do you still have about taking a work break?
• How do you typically handle disruption, changes, and uncertainty?
• Who or what will you rely on during panic moments or stressful moments when things don’t go as planned?
• When will you make time for your needs and priorities during your time off?
• How would it feel to come out on the other end of the journey stronger and with new perspectives?

Want to having this chapter all to yourself? Either purchase a copy of The Art of the Sabbatical here or a signed copy here , and you can also download the chapter for free here.

And, for those in the DC Metro Area, Cady North will be making a stop on her book tour at the Brookland Busboys and Poets on Thursday, October 23rd. Get your tickets here!