My Monday Rant: Who am I? Who are we? The complex that is a personality...

Monday 29th July, 2024

Who am I? Who are we?

Personality. According to the Oxford Dictionary, it is "the combination of characteristics or qualities that form an individual's distinctive character." It is no wonder that personalities are so complex and subjective; who is to say how many characteristics or qualities need to combine to form a distinctive character? There is also a small matter of observation. In the world where we have access to so much information and in which we make decisions and conclusions in a matter of seconds, do we really understand anyone's personality for real? Better yet, do we really understand our own personalities? It is such a daunting task to have to describe yourself, isn't it??With all this access to information, that still remains such a daunting task!

Is it that one doesn't know oneself or just the endless possibilities of combinations at disposal? We go through several emotions, sometimes in matter of minutes, and we react to each differently... what of that makes one's personality? It is my observation that, as humans, we are generally very good in describing what we dislike more than what we like, particularly with personalities. I believe humans are inherently good, which is why the "personalities" that we dislike, stand out. In any case, it is much simpler to list 5 things as opposed to 5000, isn't it?

I watched a video recently, Jordan Peterson, talking about his friend who liked firing people; he would be hired by companies as a consultant for the specific reason of firing people. He actually liked doing it. His reasoning was, "I go into companies and I find people who kiss up and punch down... people who take all the credit... people who don't distribute any of the benefits... manipulators... people who are lying about their motivation... or even people who are in the wrong place doing what they shouldn't be doing." It got me thinking about personalities, again. In my head, I imagined this virtual company and it got me thinking if I would have been fired or not. Of cause the default for most of us might be a stern NO. In the same light, you might ask someone else or a group of other people the same question, about you and surprise, surprise; YOU would have been fired! There is often a disparity between perceived personality and one's own view of one's personality... and I do dare say disparity, though it might just be unconscious or just a misunderstanding.

On reflection though, how many of us would be in the firing line in that imaginary company? Why do we think we would or wouldn't be? Or maybe, personality is much larger than that Oxford Dictionary definition. Does it extend to the insights from your observers? But then again, should it really matter what your observers think? I was asked this question once in an interview, it was the Managing Director, "If I asked ****** about who you are, what would he say?"... I will leave out my response and just say, so maybe it does matter!?But I do not, in anyway, want to insinuate that who you are is what people think about you or that one's being boils down to personality; there is so much that goes into who you are as a person, a lot more than just personality. And definitely a whole lot more that goes into one's personality than what your observers perceive it to be!

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But then, I appreciate and acknowledge the complexity that is a personality, and I'm intentional with my stance that I will not judge with haste nor will I draw conclusions on people's personalities, at least, I will not be quick about it; that requires the amount of time and observation that matches the complexity level it is.

Até proxima semana!