My Monday Rant: Is fear real? Is it a monster or a necessary evil?

Monday, 23rd September 2024 - we go again!

Fear, an unpleasant emotion caused by threat of danger, pain or harm. That's the definition, according to Google. But what is it, exactly? Why do we experience fear? And why does it look or feel like some people don't?

I listen to Gospel music sometimes... actually, a lot! There's two songs by Bethel (Melissa Helser and Jonathan David) that reference fear, "Raise A Hallelujah" and "No Longer Slaves". There's a line in the former that says "I raise a Hallelujah, fear you lost your hold of me!" The line in the latter goes, "I'm no longer a slave of fear, I am a child of God." And then, there's another one from Hillsong United, "Not Today"; it references fear a number of times but two lines stand out for me, "Fear must have thought I was faithless when it came for my heart" and "Fear is just a liar running out of breath". As a Christian, these confessions make me feel better and they do make me feel courageous in everything I face in life. But still, I lack the understanding of exactly what fear is.

The weird thing about fear is, more often than not, the one thing we have so much fear for turns out to be a "false alarm", yet the control we have over fear is so little! And by its definition, it is an unpleasant emotion and so, it goes without saying (even though I'm gonna say it anyways), it is an undesirable emotion. Even though, there are ways of dealing with fear, ways to determine what you do with your fear... the initial acknowledgement is that, there is fear to deal with in the first place. Is it that people who look like they don't experience fear, have just mastered their reaction to fear? Is fear even real?

I personally have fear of the unknown, which means I've always been afraid of the future in some way. And being a dad now, that fear just multiplied. That future I was afraid of as a teanage boy is here now, and in my fair assessment, I didn't change anything by being afraid then; I am where I am. But still, fear is fear. I'm naturally very logical (too logical I've been told sometimes) and I'm very practical as well. For these reasons, I'm more inclined to relying more on life's principles that are somewhat predictable - if you respect people, they reciprocate (well, majority of them), consistent hard work (and a bit of luck) pays, the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. In short, if "A" then "B"... It is such a taunting feeling when "A" looks is gonna lead to "C", not "B"; that uncertainty, that's what stirs up the fear.

Undesirable as fear might be, it is the driver of some of the world's most powerful and desirable attributes in human beings - morality being one of them. Timeliness, because you're afraid to disappoint the people you're meeting. Loyalty, trust, will, motivation, perseverance, endurance, ambition are just some of those attributes that could be driven by fear - be it fear of failure, fear of judgement by others or generally, fear of the alternative in each case. If "A" doesn't look like is gonna be "B", and that fear kicks in... you have one option but to embrace it in some way, soldier on and try to influence that outcome in some way; that builds character, that builds resilience! Maybe fear is what we all need to be the people we are, maybe it is the necessary evil.

As I sign off, I would like to say I know how to deal with my fears, but I would be lying... and so, my prayer goes on for God to grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. And maybe, just maybe...

Até proxima semana!