My Mam - the biggest female influencer in my life.

On the day that is in it, I'm pausing to reflect on the woman who has had the most influence in my life – my Mam. 

Thank you for teaching me so much about the value of community – and the importance of giving back to make it stronger.

My mother is a stay at home mother. She dedicated her life to raising 5 kids and being there for Dad. I hadn't given much thought until recently on the influence she has had on me running my own business. Dad ran our family business and I always gave him the kudos for that influence in my life. I've been reflecting on the values and purpose of my business and the way I do things. I'm seeing more and more now the influence my Mam has had on that.

I remember about 14 years ago I was interviewed for an newspaper article. The journalist asked me who were my influences in fashion. I immediately was trying to think of big brand names that would resonate with people...even though I don't buy much because it is a brand name. I buy based on what I love, it's colour, texture, style and how it speaks to me. A few days later I was sharing the article with my parents. My Dad's immediate question was "and what about your mother? Isn't she your biggest fashion influencer? And it struck me then. How could I have not realised that!

Over the weekend I was thinking of the other big impacts she has had on me.

My sense of Community: Mam was very involved in the Tidy Towns Competition and gave endless hours to make my hometown Boyle town look it’s best. Even though, I did not appreciate being dragged out to help when I was younger! I know why she did it now. She also is a member of the local choir for 43 years which I know she misses so much with COVID. Community is a very strong value for me in my business and home life. I can see now that my mother’s leadership in this area was a big influence on me.

As I grow to be more and more like my mother each day, I realise all that I did get from her.

• Her sense of style and love of colour.
• Her strong sense of family and giving all you have to family.
• Her consistency in always being there (running my own business I am not as strong in this area but I do make sure that either Michael or I are there for our boys). Consistency is so important for clients. I like them to feel I am always there for them, helping to fix any problems. And celebrating the results.
• Her true grit and bravery. Mam walked out of her bedroom door immaculately dressed, wearing a smile and lipstick, every single day. I am sure in raising 5 kids she had her tough days. The 70s and 80s were economically challenged in Ireland. 2020 was the toughest year of my life in business. I watched my client's business be devastated in the hospitality and events industry. My business for the year got wiped out in February and March. Just when we were starting to build our home. A project that was 3 years in the making. My reaction to this crisis was to help my clients control their reaction to it. Because that is all we could control. I showed up for my clients and ran "Space to Re-Think "sessions where I had conversations with over 600 people. That gave me strength and insights that helped me recover. That was my walking out of the bedroom, wearing a smile and lipstick moment. I did a rebrand under CiaraFeely.com and we went ahead and built our home. Somehow!
• Her love of getting her hair done every week!
• Her being a teacher, a home economics teacher. Whom I was constantly learning from everyday. I picked up a lot about running a house efficiently, safely, making delicious meals and how fab it is to be a wonderful baker. I haven’t developed the baking skills yet…but maybe some day. It is the joy of seeing my boys licking the spoon and bowl that counts. I hung around to lick the bowl too when Mam was baking. In my role as a teacher of sales skills and sales strategies, I share that teaching skill with her.

Mam had to give up working when she got married – yes, that was a law in Ireland in the late 60s. If you worked for the government, you could not work outside of the home. She devoted herself to supporting Dad and raising 5 children. I now know the sacrifices she made to do all of that and make it look easy.

• My Mam has an amazing ability to selflessly give and put others first.  
• My mother is a very good listener. While this is a skill I am always trying to get better at, Mam always has time to sit and listen. To chat with people as she meets them while out and about. To make everyone feel important and what they have to say is very important, because it is! I continue to work on that skill for my own leadership. It’s a skill I teach to sales leaders all around the world, sharing some of the joy my mother has given to me.
• The way she makes you feel.

On International Women's Day, I wish all the wonderful women out there who don't realise the impact you are having, have had and will continue to have, a beautiful day.

Thank you Ursula Feely for sharing your super powers.

A little about me: I teach companies how to build relationships that WIN business. If you'd like to talk about building stronger client relationships in your business, set up a time with me here.