My major crossroads and what I learned.

Two years ago today (26th March 2019) I went in to hospital for a check-up and heard something that nobody wants to hear. I was told I had cancer. I knew that this was not great…the fact that the specialist said “We’ve paged the Macmillan nurse, who is a trained counsellor, as you probably should have a chat with her”…was a bit of a slap in the face too.

I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little bit scared by this. For the sake of my wife I put a brave face on things but, no matter how positive I am as a person I had a sinking feeling that "perhaps I won't actually be there to see my kids get married"...

The NHS was incredible, within one month I was out of hospital after my surgery (24th April 2019) and starting a course of chemo. A recovery plan was in place and a follow-up series of check-ups were booked.

I was very lucky, it was caught early and the regular checks caught a slight recurrence immediately it appeared and it was quickly dealt with last year.

Much later on I did a little bit of research (and wished I hadn’t) about survival rates of this type of cancer and realised that had it not have been caught when it was things could have turned-out very differently and I might not even be writing this now.

This whole experience has made me think very carefully about what the point of it all is and my conclusion is that it’s not what I thought it was!

All too often we make the focus of our lives chasing the dollar, on owning stuff, on "creating a legacy". We pursue our career. We live for the weekend and those times when we “decompress” or “let our hair down” after work, over Christmas or when on vacation. We do this because we fundamentally don’t love, or in some cases even like, our work.

When I was 18 I was indestructible, literally. I knew no fear, I was never ill, I healed quickly if I injured myself. Because I was going to live forever I knew that there would always be another day so what I made of today and whether I enjoyed it was irrelevant. Up until two years ago I felt exactly this was still.

Having a rude awakening from this belief system has given me an entirely new perspective on things. A much healthier one I hasten to add.

So here are a few of my realisations:

• Life is short (even if you live to 100 it’s still short) so I needed to be doing something I enjoyed and if I’m not doing something I enjoy I must be doing something that I know is moving me towards my dream.
• Doing a job I hate, with people I don’t like because “the money is good” is, I posit, not a good way to live my life. 
• I must make time for myself, my family and my friends. If lockdown has taught me nothing else it has shown that work-life balance is important.
• If I were gone tomorrow would my professional life be looked upon fondly by others? Would people say “I really enjoyed working with Adam and always enjoyed our calls” or would they say “he got the job done but…”
• Work is important, let’s be honest we all spend more time working than playing, but my work is “what I do” not “who I am”
• I must learn to take pleasure in the small things as well as the big. Yes, I love winning a new piece of business or buying a new car, but I must also celebrate playing that piece I’m working on “right” or making a great sourdough loaf. Every win…is a win.

This short list might be revelatory and entirely new to you or, more likely, you will already know all of this and will have been practicing it for years. The point is though that we are all on a journey and the journey is the part we need to enjoy because it might be all we have.

Many of you will probably be familiar with the works of Alan Watts the British philosopher, writer and speaker. Of you're not, this piece of his (illustrated by Trey Parker and Matt Stone - of South Park fame) is a brilliant introduction to Watts' thinking and something that we should all watch from time to time - 3 minutes well spent.

It's never too late to change what you do and how you do it.

'If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today? ' And whenever the answer has been 'No' for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.”

Steve Jobs

One thing I am very lucky with is my work. I love what I do and I love the people I do it with (colleagues and clients). Helping to develop them, and developing myself is both a privilege and an amazing awakening...

Do something great with yourself, we all have something to offer and your ONLY point of difference in this world is who you are.