My life has come to a standstill today!!

Farewell Dear Papa!!

Miss you terribly!!

Today, at 8.47 AM 19th April, 2019 my life has ended with the loss of my dear Papa in September. It was the loss of my only HERO!

The rest below are the outpourings of every daughter who looses the centre of her Universe -which I share right now.

 "The overwhelming grief of the loss of my Dad, this larger than life figure who had been our security net, made me feel very lost and vulnerable. Dealing with the immense loss of my circle of love and safety as I have known my entire life, felt like I had fallen into deep waters, not knowing how to swim.

 That brought on a mountain of anxiety and overwhelm on top of the grief!!

 I will always miss Papa for his constant reassuring presence and his structured, timely, methodical and organized mindset for taking care of all financial and legal matters with perfection, maybe sometimes a bit too much. He had his reasons behind his attitude, given the immense challenges of not only surviving but thriving in a developing country like India where activities like opening an account at a financial institution is still done in person and all paperwork filled out in hand, without a single mistake or scratch! I filled out one form at least 5 times to finally get it to be accepted!!

 I have inherited some of Papa’s mindset but I have had to learn the hard way to let go of the "perfection" and balance it with some patience and kindness.

My lessons learned were as that when we love and care for a dear one, we don't have to "do" everything for them, we don't have to take all their decisions, protect them from making mistakes, make it comfortable and easy by taking over the tasks. This way they don’t become dependent on us or anyone else because in the end, they will have to take care for themselves, physically, emotionally, financially and even spiritually. Everyone, including us, will go away one way or another.

I am forever grateful that I had the opportunity to live a safe and content childhood with very loving supporting parents who gave us a lot of opportunities to grow and showed us the world! Mumma and Papa live on in my kids’ hearts and mine and in a younger brother, with whom I have revived a new kind of friendship! I am also very grateful for the sweet & kind kiddos and husband, who are very patient with their “out of the box” Mom and wife :)

 Love = Kind Respect + Acceptance + Faith;

Wishing you all a very peaceful, strong and loving 2019!

 Thank YOU for your support by reading this all the way to the end "