My Journey To Be a Life Coach

My Story

I experienced a tragic life event, and it was a life-changing experience. I will never forget that day for the rest of my entire life. It was 13 May 1998 in Jakarta when the Riot against Chinese Indonesians happened.

It targeted the Chinese Indonesian community. They killed, raped, tortured, looted, and burnt the houses, buildings, and shops. At the time, I was working in the China Town. I was at the wrong time and wrong place.

I'm not going into the details otherwise it would be like a book instead of a short article. Since that day, I vowed that every bad experience that happened to me, I would turn into something positive for life lessons.

The lesson that I learned from racial discrimination; I will not discriminate against people based on their race, religion, disability, sexual orientation, etc. I will not judge people, but I try to understand people.

Since 1998, I read plenty of psychology, self-help, and philosophy books. Yes, I'm a nerd. I was fascinated to learn about human behaviour. It helps me understand other people's perspectives and develop empathy and interpersonal skills.        

Then I married someone with autism spectrum disorder (ASD). My life was becoming more challenging. Eventually I also self-educated myself by reading many neuro-divergence books.

My best friend has obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and anxiety. Again, it prompted me to read every different aspect related to psychology from depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

Another dear friend, her father committed suicide, I was her support. Finally, my son's buddy also committed suicide. My life was full of continuous challenges. The psychology and philosophy books helped me tremendously.

I turned all my adversities into competitive advantages. Hence, most of my colleagues did not know what I experienced. I was a high performer too, in a stressed and hectic work life in the Construction Industry. I just loved my job; I loved mentoring and coaching cadets/ graduates/ junior staff, these were the contributing factors of my high performance. It was passion met talents.        

Journey to a Life Coach

From psychology, self-help, and philosophy books; then I started to read many leadership books. My favourite author, of course, is John C. Maxwell. He was humble, a person with gratitude and humility. I was astonished by his character.

John Maxwell and I share the same core values: Integrity, honesty, accountability, respect, and responsibility. I adopt all John Maxwell leadership teaching into my work. It was effective.

I also applied to my son. My son has become a person who accepts responsibility and accountability from a young age. He is also humble and kind. It was not easy for a neurotypical (NT) child to cope with a neuro-divergent dad.

I coach my son to develop empathy skills, embrace adversity, and flip every disadvantage into a competitive advantage. The most rewarding of John Maxwell's teaching, my son received a scholarship from year 7 to year 12.

Lately, I questioned the purpose of my life. I want a fulfilling and meaningful life. The life that adds value to other people. Life is without meaning if we cannot find purpose and joy.

To obtain a purposeful, meaningful life with joy; our life must add value to others. Then I enrolled in the Maxwell Leadership Team. I believe my life experience, all the books I read, my training and my qualifications from the Maxwell Leadership Team equip me to be a Life Coach.        

What Is a Life Coach?

Life Coach is to help people move from where they are, to where they want to be or to grow and navigate the obstacles/challenges/opportunities that appear along the way; through thought-provoking conversations and creative processes that empower/inspire you with the answers you need and to maximize your potential (personally / professionally).

Life Coach is to unlock all the sources through imagination to see the possibilities / see things differently to move them to be productive/intentional with their process.

Coaching is not delving into the past. We are looking at the present staying on track and moving to the future.?It is a forward-focus.  Coaching aims to reach goals / overcome obstacles / to find greater fulfillment / to investigate leadership potential.         

Who’s Coachable?

This is to answer the question of what is the difference between coaching and psychologist. A life coach does not deal with the issue of mental health. Any mental health issue, we refer to psychologist or psychiatrist.

We coach the following categories:

?? Mentally healthy and functioning people (not suffering from mental illness, no significant life stressors).

?? They seek and want coaching (there is no resistance to coaching). They are willing and ready to be coached. They are receptive to learning.

?? They are flexible and open to change. They are willing to be resilient and open to trying new things to the goals.?

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