My Father, life coaching and i

I have a confession to make; "I love my father a lot". 

You're probably thinking "Okay Nader, thanks for telling us this, and we're pleased that you love him, but that's nothing new." 

If you did think that, then you're probably not alone. What I need to add is that I respect, respect, respect, respect, respect, respect (you get the idea...) even more. Now let me tell you why I owe this man, this cornerstone of my entire existence, so, so much!

Before I get into it, those of you who know me know that one of my passions in life is life coaching. So, if you're wondering how my relationship with my dad has anything to do with life coaching, sit tight; I'm about to explain.

For those who aren't familiar with life coaching, let me indulge you a little. A life coach is a type of wellness professional that can empower you to make progress in your life so that you can attain greater fulfillment from it. As a life coach, it's my goal to aid my clients in self-improvement, and I help them in their relationships, careers, and day-to-day lives. 

Right off the bat, I want to guarantee you something; life coaching works, and it works by the life coach creating easy-to-use strategies that target your unique skills and gifts. We show you the door, hand you the key, and in some cases, show you where the handle is. We then help you walk through that door. You see, everything is in your control. As a life coach, what we do is make you see that you have that control, then sprinkle some boosting spice over it so that you can take action.

Any successful life coach knows that there are essential coaching skills he or she must have in their skills toolbox. These include:

1. Being objective
2. Being supportive, yet firm when needed
3. Knowing who you are
4. Being a willing learner
5. Having the ability to leave your judgment or judgements at the door. No one is the same. Everyone is different
6. Being a great, no scratch that, a fantastic listener
7. Being flexible
8. And of course, ever life couch needs to keep dreaming

"Okay Nader, but you started off this conversation by talking about your dad. How does your relationship with your father have anything to do with life coaching?"

I'm glad you asked.

My father is the first person who taught me all of the above; all of the skills a life coach needs if they're to truly empower someone. Each and every skill a life coach needs was instructed to me by my dad at a very young age. Dad never had an agenda of turning little Nader into a life coach. No, he did everything possible to make me the man I am today, and to be honest, dad has continued to teach me these skills ever since. My dad is my life coach. 

If I need to describe him in a few words, I would say that he masters human communication engineering, and this is vital for anyone who's gearing themselves for real success. Research carried out by the Carnegie Institute of Technology, found that 85% of financial success is due to skills in "human engineering", personality, and the ability to communicate, negotiate, and lead.

I believe I have been successful. Okay, I'm not in the same ballpark as Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk. And on a side note, it is not only that I look very similar to my dad physically. I inherited a few of his qualities. If you're ever in Doha and want to make me smile, simply tell me I look like my dad ?.

The story doesn't end here. I recall in one of the life coaching sessions (on my way to becoming a certified life coach) being asked a simple question, which took me aback; "what's your biggest fear, Nader?" The answer was simple; to lose my dad without having the opportunity to look into his eyes and tell him face to face, that I love him and I respect him, and that he is the reason for my success. I know that to many this might be a cliché and easy answer to the "what's your biggest fear" question, but for me personally, it's the most challenging fear.

To cut a long story short, I committed to my life coach that the next time I visited my home country, I would get to complete this challenge. I know myself and I knew this would be a difficult task. To help me achieve it, I decided to break it down into phases. The first phase was to express my feelings on our family WhatsApp Group, which has been named the Les Kassir's. We lack creative innovation... ??.

I recorded a voice note and sent it over on the group and after endless attempts, I succeeded. After these attempts, I thought for a second that I have no more tears left ??. Three weeks later, I visited Lebanon and I arrived home in Beirut at 5 am. It was a surprise visit, and guess who opened the door to greet me? Dad. This was indeed the moment, the moment I had prepared myself for years. I was too close to surpassing my fear and achieving my goal of telling this man everything. I was so close to it, I could feel it. Yet, my throat decided to not help out. Then the muscles in my face decided to team up with my throat in trying to see me fail. This ended up in my facial expression changing drastically, coupled with my voice wavering. My vocal chords were failing me, but I simply had to say it!

And yes, I did it!

I looked my dad in his eyes and said "dad, I'm sure you know it, but I only want to tell you that I love you and I respect you, and I truly believe that after God, you are the reason for my success. You are the reason behind everything that's beautiful in my life, the reason everything has happened the way it has. I thank you from the bottom of my heart."

As I said it, I literally felt as though I was flying. I felt a relief that I will never be able to express. It was one of my greatest moments in life.

I recall his answer. It was short and precise, which is just like him. He's not a man of many words, but the words he says have gravitas and energy; "I love you as well and I am proud of you and your brother, and sister. You are my everything."

What's the meaning behind me telling you this?

It's simple. If you love someone so much, don't wait like me! Go ahead right now and unleash your emotions and express yourself. If you don't, you might regret it one day. Our parents are God's grace on earth and there is nothing more important than them. This emotional connection that bonds us to them is universal and can't be quantified.

Life coaching has changed my life drastically! This small "I love you" made a big impact in my life and it still is. If you've never spoken to a life coach, I can't stress how important it can be to your overall wellness. It's never too late to steer your ship in the right direction. And don't be scared. Take that step.

So, before I go, I'll leave you with this...

Say "I love you"

Don't wait!

nader ALI kassir