In my experience...authenticity boosts relatability

I try to approach most interactions with optimism, believing in the genuineness of all parties involved. The alternative is approaching interactions with suspicion, which I do at times. And there are certainly instances where I should have been more cautious or aware of what I was walking into. More often than not though, the glass-half-full approach turns out to be the right one. This choice of how to approach interactions applies to all aspects of life.

One of the results of every interaction is the establishment of a level of trust, both in the present and as a baseline for future interactions. The level of trust can be anywhere on the spectrum from no trust to complete trust. Most of the time it’s somewhere in between. Trust in a relationship is like the oil in an engine or the electricity in a house, it’s the facilitator of progress. Trust determines how we interact with one another, and it many times it stems from authenticity.

In my experience, authenticity boosts relatability. When we think about relatability we usually think about similarities as a path to common ground. However, I’ve found that when potential similarities aren’t known or accessible it’s our ability to be authentic that can bridge the gap. Authenticity manifests as truth, vulnerability, confidence, comfortableness, communication and professionalism.

While those descriptors of authenticity are positive words, that doesn’t always mean the resulting relatability means likability. There are people I believe are authentic but that I don’t particularly care for. Likability has more to do with personal preferences, and it’s not possible or reasonable to like all people all the time.

My observation has been that when I’m authentic in my interactions with people, especially in a professional setting, they feel more comfortable being authentic in return and our mutual relatability increases. One of the biggest benefits from this is the efficiency of movement toward the success of whatever we’re working on, resulting from the trust we’ve established.

I like working with people who are authentic because of the transparency they exhibit. Inauthentic people are harder to read and therefore harder to trust. They usually come off as arrogant which I interpret as uncomfortable with themselves and their abilities, ironically. Authentic people are generally more fun to work with, assuming the likability factor exists, because they’re willing to interact and communicate with others in a way where each person’s strengths and weaknesses are known and navigated effectively.

Being authentic is sometimes refreshingly easy. I’m not always authentic in my interactions but when I am it’s typically accompanied by a feeling of relief that I don’t have to go to the effort of not being authentic, and that I’ll know quickly if I’m accepted (or rejected) for it. When meeting a new person or team it doesn’t take long to get a sense of their authenticity, which then tells me how productive or challenging the relationship and path forward might be.

The “In my experience…” article series began in late 2018 and is based on the experiences and observations of Brett Simpson, Managing Director of Elevate Simply, during his 20+ years of leadership experience in large and small organizations, and as an entrepreneur, advisor and investor. In 2021 the series began including refreshed versions of previous articles, noted by “(v2)”, in addition to new articles.