My elder sisters feel entitled to my money, what should I do?
Ifeoluwa Adegoke (CFEI, CMSA, FPWM)
Founder, MTWI Financial Services I help 9-5ers build wealth & achieve lasting financial security. Financial Planner | Award-winning Financial literacy instructor | Over 20,000 people impacted with financial education
"They depend on me for everything even though they earn their own money"
Hello Ifeoluwa,
Thank you for responding to the messages I sent earlier. I have an issue that is giving me sleepless nights and I don't know how to handle it.
I am the last born of 3 girls and I am 23years old. I finished school early and started my career in tech which I have worked really hard at growing. And thank God that in about two years, I have gone from earning N70,000 to about N2.5million monthly. About 8months ago when I got the job at the international company I currently work with, out of excitement, I called my family members living in Ibadan (I live in lagos) to tell them about this major win for me and I also told them the pay package. My parents were so happy and my two elder sisters. In less than a month, my oldest sister said she was relocating to lagos and asked if can I accommodate her, of course I said yes. Not too long my other sister also came to lagos to stay at my place.
Ife since then, life has been hell for me. I work remotely so I like to stock the house with food, drinks and everything I will need for the month. My sisters will finish everything in the house in less than 2 weeks without making the effort to buy a single thing. They just inform me when something has finished, subtly implying I buy another one. They depend on me for everything even though they earn their own money. That's not even the worst of it, I have been turned to their maid as I do all the house chores and clean up after them.
About 2months ago, I called my parents to tell them about all this ordeal, but my parents insisted it is rude for me to expect my elder ones to be cleaning the house when I the last born is there. On the reckless consumption of the food and groceries in the house, my parents minimized it by saying "shebi I can afford it" and that I should not worry they too will make it soon. I was heart broken at my parents' disposition to the matter. Ife there are many things I am enduring in my own house that will be too long to type here.
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Now, I am thinking of leaving the house for them and renting a new apartment where they will not know and where I can have my peace and sanity back. Please advise me, should I go ahead or is there any other solution?
I have shared my opinion with the poster, but what do you think should she move or is there a better solution? Share your thoughts in the comments.
Financial Accountant /Tax Accountant/Insurance Accountant/Financial analyst/Data analyst /Internal Auditor/Start-up Accountant/Expert in Cost Management & Business Growth.
6 个月I often advise people, to never trade your peace of mind and sanity for anyone or anything. If they are not earning is a different ball game but since they are earning and decided to be playing on her with her own hard-earned money... She can decide to stop stocking the kitchen and be stocking her room and wardrobe, let her lock her wardrobe or buy a bag and stock up those groceries and lock...or she should go and rent another apartment and stay for her peace of mind because this is Nigeria and Africa, where most times culture will not allow the parents to speak the truth or reality of life to those her two elderly ones. Ifeoluwa Adegoke (CFEI, CMSA, FPWM) nice one
People Operations Specialist.
6 个月Since it's not sitting well with her, she should move to an undisclosed location but be mentally and physically ready for whatever the family would say cause they'll surely drag her. But in the end she would earn her peace of mind