My dying Dad & the major work+life fit misalignment I discovered during his final days + a book giveaway

Dear Friends, Three weeks ago, my Dad lost his valiant year-long battle with cancer . Sadly, this was the second time I’ve had to flexibly fit work and life together to care for a parent with cancer. In 2007, when it was my mother, I recounted the experience in The New York Times .?

Many insights I shared then remain true now, including: “Work+life flexibility is key: Can you reduce your schedule? Can you work remotely? Can you shift your hours? Can you take any medical leave under the Family Medical Leave Act? Flexibility in how, where and when you work is the tool for finding the work+life fit that allows to you provide care while working. I adjusted my hours and workload as needs changed, which meant saying ‘no’ more and even turning away business.”?

What was different this time, and noteworthy, were the parallel work+life fit realities operating simultaneously amongst the hospital nursing staff caring for my Dad.?

One, more flexible and autonomous, was enjoyed by the travel nurses. The other, more inflexible and restrictive, was the reality of the nurses who worked full-time for the hospital. These two completely different ways of scheduling (and compensating) within the same staff create a misalignment that, in my opinion, is culturally and operationally unsustainable and ultimately unnecessary. ?

In talking with one of the nurses about her longer commute, I discovered she was a travel nurse. She explained she works at this hospital a couple of days a week and at another hospital closer to her house two other days a week. “And, then,” she said cheerfully, “a couple of months every year, I work at a hospital in Colorado. My husband can do his job remotely, and we like to ski.” Then she said the magic words, “I love the flexibility. It means we can work and live and do what we want when we want to do it. So I’m willing to drive the hour and 45 minutes a couple of days a week to have it and work here.”?

Flexibility! Of course. I told her about my work helping organizations execute high-performing flexible work strategies. She told me more about being employed by a nurse staffing company and how every 12 weeks her contracts are renewed. At that time, she can determine any days she needs off or choose assignments based on where she wants to be during that time.

When I asked her if she would ever consider working on staff full-time at a hospital, she laughed and said, “Why would I do that?” She explained the difficulties of getting desired time off and inflexibility in where she worked. While she acknowledged that she does not get health insurance through her contract work, she pointed out that the extra pay allows her to afford to purchase insurance.

While all of the nurses who cared for my Dad were great, I don’t think it’s a coincidence she was the most competent and impressive, the most engaged and patient, the most responsive and knowledgeable. And I believe it’s because she has the most flexibility and autonomy to fit her work and life together in a way that works for her and the hospital. I couldn’t help but see a connection and also potential challenges.?

How must this make other on-staff nurses feel when faced with more constraints and inflexibility? Does the hospital even realize the possible implications of having two very different work+life fit realities operating simultaneously? Is it even necessary? Is it contributing to the nursing shortage? What would happen if, instead, they reimagined their operating model and made the way they scheduled and staffed more flexible for everyone??

I imagine if I were to present this possibility to hospital leadership, I’d hear the same thing I hear from leaders pushing one-size-fits-all, top-down RTO mandates or trying to pile on perks before reimagining and redefining where, when, and how the work happens best: they lament the time, effort and investment required to make real change, throw up their hands and say, “This is just easier.”?

Really, is it???

Recent research from Upwork and Flex Jobs shows that this trend toward more flexible, on-demand freelance work is meaningful and growing across industries, not just nursing. That means employers aren’t just competing with each other for talent. There’s a third employment option for people who want flexibility they might not be getting elsewhere to choose.?

It's been a long, tough year caring for and supporting my Dad. Grateful to all of the professionals who helped him and us throughout the journey.?

I'm curious, what are you seeing? Are?on-demand, flexible, freelance workers increasingly playing key roles in your organization? ??

In honor of the 20th anniversary of my first book, “Work+Life: Finding the Fit That’s Right for You,” we are giving away another hardcover signed first edition. Be the first to hit REPLY and share your mailing address.

Until next time, keep reimagining work and life,