My Case for Family Camp

 How well do we really know our children? What are their fears? What are their limits? If you already know the answers to these questions than feel free to skip the rest of this, but if you are interested in a way to find out, read on.

My wife and I are both military and spend a great deal of time not with our family. My wife was looking for a good way to connect with our daughters in a strong and long-lasting way.  Through the miracle of TV a morning show gave her the idea of Family Camp. I thought of the price tag, the time it would take away from moving into our new home and, the disruption of a routine we established after the move. However, my wife was insistent that we needed something to shake things up. Upon reading slogan after slogan, “disconnect to reconnect” and “Be a kid again” they had me.

We decided to trek away from the Hampton Roads area to North Carolina and attend Camp Highlander in Mills River. The welcome was so overwhelming that we could barely keep track of our luggage. The camp counselors descended on our vehicle like locusts picking our car clean of all luggage and in a moment had it on a Gator headed to our cabin. At this point, my stress level dipped into nothingness and it was now easy to relax for the rest of the weekend.

The structured environment and constant diligence of the camp counselors made this one of the most worthwhile experiences ever for me. Truly, the first three years of my daughter’s life I was at sea on the USS Dwight D. Eisenhower a majority of the time. My wife kept a calendar; I did three detachments (3 to 6 weeks), one mini cruise for two months, and two back-to-back deployments for 8 months a piece. In the time between deployments, my boss sent me to school to attain another qualification. In the end, she calculated that I spent a whopping 3 months and 9 days at home since my daughter’s birth four years prior. I needed to spend more time with my children, but like most of us, commitments pile up and you lose sight of the important things through all the clutter. Family Camp removed those impediments by taking all of the set up, tear down, preparation and travel out of the equation. Specifically, we ran into a camp counselor named Emily, who doubled as our personal savior as she directed us to activity sign-up. Yes, it is exactly what it sounds like. You sign up for any activities that you and your family want to do then, the next day you follow your schedule to those activities. Some activities are already part of the plan like the talent show and the square dance. Don't fear the square dance its not what you expect.

The counselors had loads of experience in all the areas. We signed up for Riflery with our three year old, and believe me I felt the anxiety build up. All the typical questions rang through my head like, how am I going to entertain my three year old while everyone else shoots? Should I let my kid shoot? Am a going to win an award for worst parent ever? Gene, who has been teaching kids to shoot for the last 16 years, introduced himself to my family and through personality, force of will, and bribery he captivated my two children through the safety portion. She was repeating the safety portion of the brief back like a game whenever she did anything. It was remarkable. When we went down to the lake we met JoJack, if you ever read this I am sorry for butchering your name. He looks like a cross between a surfer and one of those paintings of sailors in the rigging from 100 years ago. He is ready for anything you throw at him in the lake. The ladies that worked in the stable also set a high bar by teaching us both how to ride and my daughters how to care for the horses. Horses are so big they can be very intimidating and this routine helped my children get over any of that fear. Lastly, the food was fantastic and plentiful. The lady who took care of that ran a tight ship and stocked fantastic coffee (seriously, keep that coffee coming).

My family, zip lined, hiked, floating in the lake, got shot off a large balloon into the lake, kayaked, canoed, swam, swung and generally enjoyed ourselves. However, I noticed two things while my daughter volunteered to perform in the talent show and my three-year-old zip lined from 50 feet in the air without fear.  My preconceptions of my children’s limits were way off. They are far more capable than I was giving them credit for and far stronger than I realized. My youngest daughter, who is a demon on wheels, charges into any situation with little regard for safety is intimidated in large group settings. Yes, she is capable and smart, but her personality changes when faced with a large group. I noticed this at camp because the group gatherings are sometimes large and each family has a role to play. My eight-year-old daughter is timid. I often worry about her because she is a gentle soul, however she is actually a fierce competitor in everything from Archery to Riflery. Not only that, she and a friend, whom she just met the evening before, volunteered to sing in front of the entire Camp a song from The Jungle Book.

Parents often only realize their children are starting to become independent when they begin to act differently, often by making poor decisions, in an effort to draw attention to the need for more independence. Camp Highlander gave my wife and I the opportunity to view our daughters through a fresh set of eyes, unencumbered by technology and distractions, and we liked what we saw. I can only recommend Camp Highlander strongly due to attendance, but I am sure there are others out there. I recommend doing this for the sake of both family cohesion and overall sanity.