My Advice For Young Women

April was intense. I relaxed at home by quilting and watching movies. A great boon of the digital era is home entertainment.

The day before I attended the INFORMS conference in Austin, I watched the Ruth Bader Ginsberg documentary, On the Basis of Sex. The opening of the film showcases row-after- row of well-dressed men walking the halls of Harvard. The movement is rhythmic. The appearance of a few female faces at the end of the clip is jarring. The imagery sparked memories.

The scenes of Ruth at Harvard reminded me of my time in engineering school. In 1974, there were two women in my class, and there were no women's bathrooms near the classroom. (They were near the office area which was down two flights of stairs and a ten-minute walk from my desk.)

The atmosphere was anything but welcoming. In the movie, the image of the professor asking a question and then calling on the men struck home. In fact, when I struggled on a test, the professor would hold up the test in front of the class and remark that "this is why women shouldn't be in engineering school" before slamming it on my desk. I graduated in the top 10% of my chemical engineering class, but it was a struggle. The experience was not pleasant. Years later, reoccurring dreams would wake me from my sleep. The nightmare? I had not finished my senior project and had to return to complete a class.

Give Back

The hall at INFORMS--an event focused on analytics--was reminiscent of the movie. As I walked to my speaking event, the rows of men walking the halls, reminded me of the opening of On the Basis of Sex. I was speaking at the WORMS (Women in Operations Research and Management Science) reception. About sixty women of differing ages gathered to hear me speak. There were few women in the halls of the convention.

My story of an becoming an unlikely entrepreneur took about 45 minutes. In the presentation, I shared stories of Ashley, Bob, and Maxine. My goal? Be open. Successful people help people on their journey.

Embrace Ashley. When I was a teenager, physical activity in schools was limited. Home economics filled the slot of physical education classes. There were no organized sports program. Fitness, for me, is a constant struggle. At the age of 53, I was diagnosed with osteopenia (degradation of bone density in the spine). Ashley, my first trainer, cajoled me to get serious about fitness. My body was stiff and out-of-shape. After a week of squats, I could not walk. He laughed and encouraged me. In the process, I learned the names of muscles that I did not know existed. Through hard work, I reversed osteopenia without drugs. My advice to the audience? Stay in shape. Find an Ashley.

Meet Bob. I put myself through school. My last student work assignment was a co-op position for Procter & Gamble. I loved the work as much as I hated some of my classes in engineering school. The plant manager of the P&G Jackson plant wrote me letters of encouragement throughout my time at the University of Tennessee. When the professor held up my final with a red "D" in front of the class, Bob encouraged me to rise above the fray and go forward by going forward. His advice? Not to dwell on the negative, but to focus forward. What did I tell the audience at WORMS? Be a "Bob" for others. While many focus on finding a mentor and reaching up for help for one's own career, my advice is to give back to others. When you give, others give back. I would never have finished engineering school without Bob. My quest for excellence in open content research stems from this belief.

Give Thanks for Maxine. My mother was the smartest women I ever met. She made a perfect score on the GMAT in both the verbal and math sections, but was humble and never bragged. Being the daughter of a brilliant mother was intimidating. When I was thirty, mom told me about Maxine. She shared the story that I was an unplanned pregnancy. My mother told me if abortion was legal that I would have been aborted. In the process, she hung her head and reflected on her personal struggle between emotions to have a child and her intellectual debate to terminate the pregnancy. At the time, my mother was a teacher and schools would not allow staff to work while pregnant. My family struggled financially and mom worried about providing for my two brothers with the loss of work for a year. Unsure what to do, mom consulted with Maxine, her best friend. Maxine listened quietly and provided a sounding board. She did not tell my mother what to do. Mom vented on the unfortunate situation. Maxine did not judge. Together, they worked on a plan to help mom subsidize her income with the loss of work. Mom's reflection taught me three things. The first was the stark difference of opportunities for women in the workplace over three generations. For this, I give thanks. The second was the need for a good friend to be a sounding board for tough decisions, and the third was the gift of life. My suggestion for the audience? Be like Maxine.

Relax

I am lucky to be able to do what I do at the age of sixty-five. I see three themes from questions from the audience:

Start a Company? At the end of the speaking engagement, a 28-year-old woman stopped me and asked for advice on starting a company. She worked for Amazon. I asked her, "Why do you want to start a company? What can you uniquely offer that the market will find valuable?" I asked with a full understanding of the work and heartache of founding a small business. She struggled with the answer. Her response? As an employee in Silicon Valley she felt that starting a company is an important rite of passage. I asked her to shift focus from starting a company to being successful running a company. To drive success, you need to have your feet firmly grounded in management principles and your reach based on a differentiated offering. Success takes time, passion, and a differentiated offering. I am constantly amazed by the number of people that want to start a company only to check a box. My advice? Take your time. Start a company when you are ready. Don't pressure yourself. At the right time, do it for yourself as opposed to having a start-up on your resume.

Career Path? I am also amazed by the number of young professionals finitely plotting their future career paths. My issue? The workplace is constantly changing, and we do not know what positions will evolve. When I hear someone trying to push a fixed career path, I ask the person to relax and be open to the outcome. Sometimes, I reference a Forbes article I wrote, "The student graduating in 2019 will have nine careers in the course of their lifetimes. 50% of the occupations known today will be obsolete in ten years." So why, do young professionals feel compelled to push themselves into fixed career paths when what we know today will be obsolete?

Choosing Work. Recently, I was teaching at a local University, and a young student in the back of the room approached me. She was wringing her hands. Hesitantly, and without looking me in the eye, she asked, "My Company is trying to fast track me into a managerial career path. I really don't want to manage people. How do I make a decision? What do I tell them?"

I asked, "How old are you?"

"Twenty-three," she replied.

I asked her to take a deep breath. I smiled. <My thought to myself. The student was so young to feel such intense career pressure.> I replied, "Life is too short to do what you don't want to do. Focus on opening doors in your career based on what you like to do." We talked in depth about networking with people she admired to identify the characteristics of the jobs that appealed to her. This story seemed to resonate with the audience.

Adapt

At the end of this session, I was asked the question of "How had I adapted my presence, and speaking style, to fit into a man's world?" My answer prompted a heated debate. I stated that, "I learned to get rid of the chip on my shoulder." The Lora that graduated from Engineering school never felt good enough. She felt the need to outwork all the men. Inside, I was angry. It showed. Through mentoring, I now focus on channeling discomfort into humor. Laughter is a great equalizer.

This reply prompted anger in the room and replies that I was selling out. As the group pushed back, I remembered the section of the Ruth Ginsberg movie where she was preparing for a landmark case. Originally her answers, while well-researched, sounded cold pedantic. Her coaching panel asked her to redirect and use humor. This segment of the movie resonated. I think it is an excellent answer to the question that I was asked.

Maybe by the time I retire, the halls of conferences that I attend will not be rows-after-rows of men. I look forward to having to stand in a long line for the women's restroom. Meanwhile, my advice? Find people like Ashley, Bob and Maxine to help. Focus on what you enjoy and be open to the outcome.