My advice to 20-yr old me on getting into IIMA

I got into IIM Ahmedabad 13 years ago (getting old!) These days, as I see many people sharing on social media their getting admission into IIMs, I wondered what my advice would be for the 20-year old me on getting into IIMA. Here's what came to my mind:

1. The idea of ‘cut-throat competition’ is mainly in the minds of people. 

There are some whose experiences and choices have made them hyper-competitive, but they are not many in number. Most people you’d meet on campus (or online probably, thanks to corona!) are good, kind-hearted, and generous.

Besides, how people behave is determined, in large part, by the environment they are in or the culture they are a part of. While culture influences how people behave, it’s people who determine the culture. Thus, as an individual, you have the power to create the culture you’d want. If you want a culture in which people collaborate rather than compete and help others overcome shortcomings rather than laugh at others’ mistakes, you can contribute to creating such a culture.

2. It’s fine to have weaknesses. 

I was really bad at speaking English when I entered IIMA. In addition, I was very shy. In both of these ways, I was exactly the opposite of what an IIMA student was in my mind. 

And I let these weaknesses control me. I always had a doubt whether anyone at ‘IIMA’ would be interested in befriending me, for I was shy and my bad quality of English came out every time I spoke. I wondered whether others thought I did not deserve to be there.

I now realize that I need not have let those weaknesses make me reject myself. I rejected myself, and thus I became even shyer to talk and open up to others. Since I never opened up, the potential of forming deep relationships never originated. 

You may have your own weaknesses. However, they need not control you. It’s vulnerable to open ourselves to others, and it may hurt at times when others don’t respect that. However, by closing ourselves, we may save ourselves from those moments of hurt but, at the same time, by closing ourselves, we also eliminate the possibility of forming deep human relationships. What would we do with such safety that comes at such a high cost?

3. Having friends whom you can rely upon is great but is not in your control

Focus on what’s in your control. You can choose to be a person whom others can rely upon. Now, of course, it doesn’t mean you compromise on your work or grades. However, while doing our work, we can still choose to help others, even by just speaking words of encouragement. 

Over time, if you continue to do so, you’ll naturally be surrounded by people whom you can also rely upon.

4. Avoid criticism

Even though you may be going to a top b-school and getting to study from top professors, you’ll feel the itch to criticize the institution and everybody who’s a part of it. It just satisfies the inner itch to feel superior by finding flaws with others.

Avoid that. 

It just makes your experience negative and gives you excuses to not give your best (how can you? everything sucks!)

Every person and institution has some positive aspects and some negative aspects. The point is: what do you choose to focus on? If somebody asks how they can improve, you can tell them lovingly and with due respect.

Remember what you do with others, you do with yourself. So, if you criticize others for every small mistake or shortcoming, you’ll do the same with yourself. How many times have you caught yourself calling yourself ‘dumb’, ‘idiot’ etc? Till the time you don’t stop criticizing others and become more accepting of others' shortcomings, you will continue to treat even yourself harshly and continue to have a not-so-pleasant relationship with yourself.

5. Be a human first

It’s tempting to become an IIMA student first because it gives a certain high - it carries a certain prestige. However, MBA is just a part of life; it’s not a different life altogether. So, emphasizing core human values of empathy, compassion, and generosity during those two years will help you in the long run. 

You are not going there to be on the top. You’re going there to become your best version, and the biggest aspect of you is not the professional in you but the human in you.

6. Don’t look up to anybody. Don’t look down on anybody.

Sadhguru says so. And it makes a lot of sense.

The point is to treat everybody with respect, not for where they are in their professional journey but for the fact that they are human. Once you start doing so, you’ll see inside yourself a different kind of life experience beginning to take place. 

7. If you are different, it’s ok. If another person is different, that’s also ok.

We’re not going to be just like everybody else, to eliminate all differences. Rather than becoming uncomfortable with our or others’ differences, we can choose to cherish the differences and be in awe of them. Accept yourself the way you are. Of course, you may continue to work on areas that you feel can be improved. However, working on oneself and loving oneself can happen at the same time.

8. If somebody is opposing you, he’s not your enemy; he’s your teacher

Whether you look at a person having an opposing viewpoint as your enemy or somebody you can learn from is your choice. I want you to understand that. I’m not saying which choice you ‘should’ make, but I’d want you to make your choice while being aware that you had a choice.

9. People around you are not your competitors for jobs

There is an abundance of opportunities out there in the world. You can succeed while helping others succeed. 

What will you get in helping them? 

Their success. 

Yes. Their success is what you’ll get.

Isn’t it awesome to help them for the sake of helping them? 

The world may ask you to always have goals that end in you, but you can choose to be different. Your goals may end in others - in seeing others happy and successful. 

Thus, you’ll be different, but you’ll use this difference not to claim superiority over others but to see what is possible as a human and to enjoy the inner experience that it leads to.

10. Aim for long-term success

You’ll not panic if you think long-term. You’ll be able to follow your values, principles, and what aligns with your inner self much more easily if you are not rushing to achieve short-term success.

You may study the top leaders such as Sundar Pichai and Satya Nadella. You may study top books on leadership. You’ll see that eventually what it takes to succeed in the long run is not in conflict with what it takes to be a good human being. You can be happy knowing that to achieve outer success, you need not give up inner success.

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I understand that some of the advice is lofty and ideal, and much of it I still find hard to follow. However, I thought why not be ideal. Probably, by aiming high, some of us can get there.