30 Days of Gratitude

I recently completed a 30 days of gratitude experiment. I had made a commitment on LinkedIn to post a reason to be grateful about the day, for 30 days in a row. As I reflect on the journey, a few things emerge.

-         The experiment got easier as I went along. I was stuck at Day 13. That day this exercise seemed unnecessary. With encouragement from my LinkedIn readers and past the hump day, it became a joy again. I trusted my intuition to guide me to that space of sharing.

-         This experiment has extended my circle of gratitude. There were many more reasons to be grateful as I extended my peripheral vision of gratitude.

-         This also became a conversation starter with so many people I met during this period. They said they enjoyed what they were reading and we even talked about a few stories that I had posted. The magic button one seemed to have caught many eyes. 

-         There wasn’t one theme or one way to gratitude. Some days gratefulness was about simple mundane things and other days there was a profound awakening. I accepted that as life itself. The variations in content, words and quality are all part of life. A daily exercise like this definitely teaches acceptance. Without acceptance, gratitude is hard.

If you want to undertake something like this:

-         Trust yourself and begin

-         When you get stuck, acknowledge, perhaps share, seek inspiration and encouragement from your trusted aides and move on.

-         Keep it simple

-         Have a notebook handy to jot down as things up during the day.

-         Use technology for aid. I used my phone recorder app a lot during my walks or in the car to capture a thought which could be useful to share.

-         Tough it out. Take it to an end. It is a delicious feeling to finish up even, if it is only you who is keeping an account.

I am grateful to each one of you who supported me in this endeavor.

Here they are again, are the posts, in one sequence, all together.

Day 1

Today, I am grateful to Doris, an exercise instructor at my local 24-hour fitness in Redmond. Even with 30 plus people in the class, I felt her eyes on me, her voice for me; cajoling, encouraging and directing me to go the next mile. Thanks Doris, for the inspiration. I am pumped up!

Day 2

I am grateful that Seattle is breathing again. My lungs today thanked the air quality after days of choking on smog. Thanks to the marine air moving from the west and clearing the trapped smoke-filled air. I walked and breathed freely on my favorite trail again.

 Day 3

Candles are a huge part of Danish Hygge (loosely translated as Happy Living). Danes, Swedes, Norwegians and Finns are considered to be some of the happiest people in the world. Not all of it is candles, but from what I gather is that they do play a role. I read in 'The little book of Hygge', that almost all Danish homes light candles every day during fall and winter. I love candles, but the natural and unscented kind. Those are quite hard to find and are expensive. I was at IKEA for a different reason. And I found the candles I was looking for. In different shapes and sizes. Inexpensive. I brought so many of them home. I feel happy to be stocked for fall and winter. I am grateful to IKEA for my high hygge today.

Day 4

It was a breath of fresh air. And, I didn't have to watch it is a dingy run-down theater in another language with my eyes peeled to English translation of the dialog. It is a mainstream Hollywood movie in English in a regular theater close to me. I am grateful for a brilliant, funny, culturally rich, extravagant movie (Crazy Rich Asians) with an all-Asian star cast. And folks, it is not a foreign film. I celebrate that and am grateful to Hollywood as it dares to experiment more. The benefit is ours.

  Day 5

 The critic in me was busy finding all what was wrong. Too many students, it’s too fast, not deep enough; on and on. I am in this virtual class taught by world famous expert on the topic and yet I was judging. Then, she said something which changed everything. She said, “For those of you who are following my story with stage 4 pancreatic cancer, I will find out more when I get the results of the new scans on Tuesday.” I saw the silent tears roll down her eyes. Her lips quivered as she said, “They will tell me if I will need chemo again.” My heart stopped. There in front of me was a human who was eager to share wealth of her knowledge, wisdom and experiences as she was battling something horrific. When she spoke about her subject, she forgot her own fragility and became excited, animated and charged with what she could share. My head bowed in gratitude and in prayer for the health and well-being of this amazing human-being for her fortitude and commitment. My own attitude shifted to, ‘What can I learn?’, ‘What can I give?’ and ‘What legacy will I want to create?’ We have limited time on planet Earth. What can I do to make a difference? Judith is doing her bit to make it.

Day 6

In my class, a fellow student shared a story. She said that her 6-year-old was too afraid. She told her girl that she had a courage button, right on her forehead, between her eyes. Whenever she needs courage, she should press and massage and see the courage appear in front of her. It was like magic. She saw her little girl practicing this and literally moving out of fear. Words create worlds. Sometimes, unintentionally, through our harsh words, we take the very hope away from someone. On the other hand, again with a few words, we can create a powerful shift in them that they can create a brand-new world for themselves. I am grateful today to Nicole for sharing this story. I will be paying more attention to my spoken words. What words will you choose today? Especially, for managers who are busy giving annual review feedback in the coming weeks.

Day 7

I am grateful to Caroline. I didn’t know she existed, until yesterday. Feisty, strong, older woman, who on the bicycle next to me in my spin class. This was my first time. Everyone, was ready to go and off they went. I was still figuring out the six different knobs on the bikes for various adjustments. She stopped spinning, got of her bike and for the next 5 minutes, while the warm-up was in full swing, adjusted my bike with lot of attention and care. She asked me to sit on it and pedal, and observed it keenly. She readjusted, till the settings felt right. I was off to a great start. Half way though, I was about done. I found Caroline glancing at me. She said, “There are only two songs left. We are almost done.” I laughed. I said I know you are lying, but I will go till the end. And, I did. Two strangers connect and bring each other joy. My oxytocin was at all-time high. Today, perhaps, you will make another stranger’s day as Caroline made mine.

Day 8

The day came with its twists and turns. Humans and nature brought its share of not so pleasant disruptions. It felt like too many in one day. Yet, there were enough shining moments. I am grateful to the audience who valued what I had to say and also the ones who shared with me how it shifted and prompted them for something different. I am grateful to those who stayed back and said that the show must go on. Yes, disruptions are a part of natural existence. Ability to accept them and move on is resilience. I experienced both yesterday. I am grateful for that.

Day 9

My coaching client walked in with a smile. Through our sessions of coaching, he was experiencing choices and control. He found that liberating. That smile was brand new, that relaxed state, a new state of being. He said, it was as if heavy clouds had finally lifted after years. I am grateful that he dared to experience Coaching. I feel also grateful that I can do what I do. I am today grateful for my own choices too.

Day 10

@Arun Sharma and @Seema Sharma through their leadership and foresight brought five south Asian countries together to celebrate their traditions and culture with US, at Utsav Mela in Bothell. The local politicians and the chancellor of UW Bothell @Wolf Yeigh and Dean of business school @Sandeep Krishnamurthy, also showed support with their presence and words. Sunita Singh invited me to bring the richness of our age-old traditions of Yoga, breathing (Pranayama), meditation and wholistic living. I am grateful to her. I also met a lot of beautiful people and had rich conversations. So much to be grateful for! Just a few shout outs of gratitude here: Kudos Seema & Arun, for creating the utsav (festivities) of people and communities. I met Raji Ram, the founder of Kinder Konnection non-profit serving over 6000 under-served & homeless kids in many school districts of the Washington State. It was an amazing story. Check-out https://lnkd.in/g-gvwnb for this inspiring story. Thanks to the lady for brought all the info about the upcoming Tasveer South Asian Film festival with a fascinating line-up. https://tasveer.org/ Another beautiful day in my life!

Day 11

I read “On the Brink of Everything” by Parker J. Palmer in one go. Thanks Scott Melanson, for introducing me to Parker Palmer. Now this is book not meant to be read in one go and I know I will read it again and again while I am looking at both my shadow and light. However, have you ever felt that you find a book at a given time meant for you, as if it was written for you? And this one's for me. My own life journey, it's experiments, the paradoxes and how it is evolving, suddenly makes sense. Palmer brings up the notion of gifts we are born with over and over his book, provoking us to notice if we are faithful to our gifts and if we have paid attention to match them with the needs of the world. That way we can offer the best of us to the world.

Like his journey, I feel we all are a work of lifetime, and we never really arrive. I feel happy that I am on the path with its paradoxes and experiments.

Day 12

My work with the non-profit International Coach Federation (ICF) WA chapter is a source of joy and fulfillment for me. I feel closer to Parker J Palmer’s invite, “Let’s remind each other that the planet cries for us to contribute our personal gifts – whatever they maybe – to the common good.” We dream big, because if our dreams don’t scare us, they are not big enough. And we get results. I realized that our greatest accomplishments are achieved by our teams and not just by any one of us. This was triggered by an email from Osnat. We are extending our ICF -UW Bothell MBA Coaching program, from a small scale to full force. We started early this year and now with a successful pilot behind us, we go big. This is a lot of hard work and detail. Osnat’s did precisely that with the plan and 23 ICF credentialed masterful coaches signed up for the 100 students. Together with her UW counterpart Angela Harris, they have set a foundation for a great program to follow. Kudos to them! Thanks Sharmin, Osnat, Sandeep, Angela and the larger team of wonderful coaches, for their support, blessings, hard work, their invaluable time for the pilot and now getting us to the next level. Thank you!

Day 13

We are at day 13 and I am stuck. I feel grateful for many things but I feel that it will be a repeat of what I have expressed until now. What if I were to begin again? No, not from day 1. What if, at day 13, like, I am writing for the very first time? I am novice, with sense of curiosity and inquiry about life; my vocation, my small world and the big one which has you and me in it. What do I notice? I bring beginner’s mind and this becomes fun again. I notice my ‘inner wisdom’ comes into play. When we take a step back from the stuck state and tap into our resources, it makes our life and work beautiful. Today I celebrate us; our curiosity, the beginner’s mind and our inner wisdom!

Day 14

I grew up on farms. We grew our own vegetables, fruits and grains. We milked our cows. I still remember the sweet taste of freshly pulled carrot off the ground. I have tasted fruit in all its various stages of ripening including when it just falls off the tree on its own. When my friend invited me to pluck apples off their apple tree, I was joyous. We were both like young children jumping high to reach the branches. We even used sticks to bring down the fruit, we couldn’t reach. Later, another friend brought freshly harvested tomatoes from her yard. Simple pleasures of life! What if we all grew some fruits and vegetables. To honor and respect nature, that we are such an integral part of. I am grateful to be connected again to earth, which grows and nourishes us.

Day 15

I met my friend Sarah Kruse, for lunch. The time stops with her. We feel like we are suspended effortlessly in the universe, dancing in joy. She shared a story about her daughter Amulya which blew me away. Amulya was four years old then and they lived in Hawaii. Amulya like a curious unstoppable 4-year-old asked incessant questions. One day she asked Sarah, “Where do we come from?”. Sarah answered, Amulya asked more and Sarah kept up. Finally, Amuyla asked, “Where did the very first person come from?” She insisted that she gets an answer. Then they asked their wise friend who invited Amulya to ask the ocean for an answer. Amulya watched the waves and the humpback whales along the waves for a while. As they walked back home, she declared that she had the answer. She said, “We come from the darkness and move into the light”. Sarah was quite shocked with her reply and asked her how she knew. Amulya said she just does. Later Sarah got to know that there is a Hawaiian legend about humpback whales called Kohola – that means from darkness to light. I am grateful for our innate wisdom and intelligence we are born with. I am grateful to Sarah for sharing her story.

Day 16

A smaller group of Conversational Intelligence (C-IQ) enthusiasts from our larger class met on our own and applied our knowledge of C-IQ principles and tools to our current challenges and scenarios and got creative in adopting them. It was clear that you could adopt that approach to anything in life. It gives easy way for you to move from a protect behavior to being partners, from distrust to trust, from fight/flight to calm and creative. Being open, transparent, compassionate, having clear intention is a good place to begin conversations. Double Clicking is one of the best tools available for us to confirm understanding. We often assume that we have the same understanding of what the other person’s is and more than often it is not the case. That’s why people find a huge gap between their intention and impact. Double Clicking is asking the next level question in places where assumptions can lead to problems, conflicts and misunderstandings. Next time you are in protect mode, ask me how to move to a more trusting and compassionate state; building relationships, while building products. I am filled to the brim with gratitude for the learning and interactions in the day.

Day 17

Earth’s crammed with heaven,

And every common bush afire with God;

But only he who sees, takes off his shoes,

The rest sit round it and pluck blackberries

                       - Elizabeth Barrett Browning

On my hike to Mason Lake today, I remembered these lines. It was perhaps the views that surround the hike, or the beauty of the forest itself, the wildflowers and the changing red maples against the backdrop of the boulders or the lake itself where the afternoon sun created a shimmering sheath on the top. I ate wild blueberries until my mouth turned purple and then did take off my shoes and lay down on top of a rock next to the lake, soaking this all in. I am grateful for such gifts of nature so close to us, where you can become one with them.

Day 18

Day 18 of 30 days of gratitude Books are my best friend. Sometimes I forget them and it’s when I hold them in my hands again, I know how much I have missed them. Even with eReaders and audio books the new norm, I love a physical book with a hardcover. My local King County Library (KCLS) feeds this passion of mine. I am amazed at their collection and how it has continued to feed this passion of mine for two decades. Today, I am grateful to them for I can bring dozens of books home, keep them for weeks, renew them online and get them from any other library in the network. I can even request them to add new books to their catalog including my own and they do. There is plenty left for me to read. My gratitude to our library system today! Books take me to a world of imagination. From the current read I quote, “The greatest gift you have been given is a gift of imagination. Everything that now exists was once imagined. And everything that will ever exist, must be first imagined.” Any guess on what I am reading?

Day 19

Today, I step out, 

With a possibility

 That is when it became possible

 To that I am grateful

Day 20

Today my eyes are welling up in gratitude. It is for a woman named Judith Glaser. She has stage 4 pancreatic cancer. Today, she had a procedure to remove the cancerous tissue from her spine. I can’t imagine the pain and anguish of being in such a state. Yet, she was there today for the four hours of our online Conversational Intelligence training. Her work in the space of Conversational Intelligence is revolutionary. Sometimes the quiver in her voice or the dryness in her throat will give her condition away. But curious large eyes spoke to me and hundreds who were attending the program; with passion, commitment and enthusiasm. She was eager that we learn and we learn well. I haven’t ever met someone like her who in such difficult time is not only holding themselves with dignity and grace but continue the demanding program with the same intensity they started with. My heart is full to its brim in gratitude today.

Day 21

Today I express my gratitude to LinkedIn.

This professional network platform has been a source of both inspiration and aspiration for me. As I deliver another workshop about LinkedIn as a part of my business offerings, I am grateful that these workshops continue to be in demand and are a hit. I am grateful that in LinkedIn I have found a medium to share my experiments, my creativity and my writing. I am grateful that I can participate and grow in topics close to my heart with rich and diverse content and sharing of different perspectives. I am grateful to have met people from all across the world on this very platform, who have brought me joy, friendship and business. Thank you, LinkedIn, for being there.

Day 22

The Angel of Winds arena in Everett seemed filled to its 10000 people capacity with AR Rahman fans and music enthusiasts. Here was a world famous, Oscar winning legendary musician, singer and artist on his US tour. His musical genius has revolutionized not only Indian film and music scene, it has also been felt by Hollywood. I got goosebumps to watch him live. While the show was spectacular and world class, what stuck with me was the humility and heart of this world-famous soul. He arrived on the stage without too much fanfare. He stayed there for every single minute of the over 3 hours of the show; singing, playing Piano and on the harmonium with the Sufi music. It was his show and he was accompanied by a brilliant band and singers, but he owned it end to end. He said a few words to the effect that he imagined that we were there to listen to good music and assured that they were there to make good music. For the next 3 plus hours they did precisely that. He won the hearts with simplicity, his captivating smile and of course the of once in lifetime kind of experience he created for his audience. I am also grateful to my friend Rachana to help create that opportunity for me.

Thank you!

Day 23

Thanks Shelmina Babai Abji for Rumi!

You were born with potential

You were born with goodness and trust

You were born with ideals and dreams

You were born with greatness

You were born with wings

You were not meant for crawling, so don’t

You have wings

Learn to use them and fly

                                   - Rumi

Day 24

The ambassador coaches came together today to discuss the progress on the plan for the @ICFHQ participation as a gold sponsor at one of the premier tech events of Pacific Northwest – the @Geekwire Summit. The energy and enthusiasm of the room was palpable. I am grateful today to all the coaches of @ICFWASTATE who are giving their time, energy and their coaching brilliance to co-create our presence in this event. My entire journey with this amazing non-profit has been rocking. This part now is bringing so much joy and filling me with gratitude. When I look at all the names we have got who will be there at the event giving FREE coaching to the patrons of the event, I feel like signing up for all those sessions myself to receive this wonderful gift of Coaching. Thank you KRISTIINA, Janis, Stacy, Miryam, John, Sharmin, Margo, Lori, Maté, Micheline, Janet M. Harvey, Janet Williams, Samia, Julie, Kelly and Kendra! Glad to have you all on

the team! Here is the link to sign up for a free one-on-one private Coaching

session. Space is limited. https://bit.ly/2x1E7ab

Day 25

Our mastermind group on Conversational Intelligence invited Elix for his expertise and depth in this area and specifically on the topic of third eye or the mind’s eye. I am not just grateful for his time but also how inspiring this conversation was. Thanks Elix Cintron, The mind’s eye is moving people from the place of problem solving to aspiration and vision. If we can imagine to write our own story, what would that look like? What values will we live? How will our relationships look like? What purpose will we be serving? There is no box in the mind’s eye. All boundaries disappear. Anything is possible. Moving beyond the realistic…we dare to dream. As Will Smith say, “Being realistic is the most common path to mediocrity.” And that’s not what most people want. Let’s move to aspiration and then work to make it come true. Elix graciously read and shared his vision. It is as if it is happening now, and aligned with his core values. It is detailed. It is however, work in progress. It is something he reads every morning. He says that not all has manifested, yet it has set the path for him and keeps him true to his target.

Day 26

As things become quite busy again, I reach out to the book, ‘Ikigai’. It had arrived in mail about 4 weeks ago. I have read a few pages, but since there were many books ahead of it, I left it there. Today, I reached out for it again, trusting my intuition, that I will be reading what I need the most. It was the perfect book for this moment. It reminded me to slow down, perhaps a wee bit. “You will live much longer if you are not in a hurry to get to the finish line”. The other thing it reminded me of how important of being in flow was to me, “Concentrating on one thing at a time may be the single most important factor in achieving flow. Today’s gratitude is for Ikigai by Francesc Miralles and Hector Garcia.

Day 27

As we come towards the end of this experiment, I feel both relieved and yet at the same time, do not want it to end. Relieved that I don’t need to share this on a public network and it can go back to being private again. Not wanting it to end as it has kept me on my feet finding goodness I can share even on days when I am not finding it easily. I have to scan the day again to find and then I always do. Today Sharmin (my President of ICF WA Chapter) and I met

to create a video recording for our fall newsletter and it reminded how much

her #leadership and the work for this amazing non-profit has meant for me. It has accelerated my path towards my own aspiration and purpose. It has brought me clarity, that you can’t bring change without being #bold. It has shown me where my heart is and what feeds my own soul. And now I look forward to our next project, International Coach Federation (WA) with their over dozen Coach members at the upcoming @Geekwire Summit and doing what they love the most - Coaching!

Day 28

Chatting with Mahesh, he asked me my biggest learnings and insights from this gratitude experiment. As I reflected, one clear shift is an expansion of my sphere of gratitude. I have maintained a gratitude journal for some time now. More often, the expression of my gratitude has been for my close family and friends. This exercise has moved me into find good in every sphere of my interaction – peers, students, strangers, neighbors, teachers, books; anything and everything. Just when I share this, my gratitude for today goes back to basics. My most grateful moments came from looking at the sunset sitting at the bench at the Junita Bay marsh, with my spouse. I guess that is why it is expansion and not new replacing the old. I am grateful to Mahesh too, who made time for me today and shared feedback on my path and its approach. It was priceless.

Day 29

In the last few years, one thing that becomes true again and again for me, is what Rumi said 800 years ago.

“If there were no grace and no kindness, conversations would be useless and nothing we do would matter. Listen to the new stories that begin every day. If light were not beginning again in the east, I would not wake now and walk out inside this dawn.”

Today, it becomes evident again and inspires me. We needed grace and kindness centuries ago and we need it today too. We are a better person and a more trusting world as a result. Every day is a new beginning. Leave the burden of the past behind as you look at the new dawn, and begin like the way sunlight begins a new journey from the east at every dawn.

Beautiful, isn’t it?

Day 30

This was decades ago. I was in high school then. I remembered having a great time in school. The details were a blur.

Out of the blue, someone initiated a group and suddenly within a day, 80% of the class was on it. Within the last 24 hours there has been a flood of flashbacks with no stopping. We were joyous, jubilant, hopeful, wild and courageous teenagers again, reliving that time.

We talked about each other, the way we have remembered it. I am grateful for what I heard about myself. They describe me as the carefree one with inviting smile and infectious laughter. They wrote that I had excellent language skills and I wrote some memorable words in the year books. And more!

I am glad on what I found out. I felt alignment with my old self. I was happy that I had not abandoned myself in my pursuit of life. This ignited me to be closer to being myself – the way I was born and meant to be. This discovery has been the grand finale to my gratitude experiment. A 360 degree on me, when I was not washed, scraped, buffed, smoothed, refined and polished. It is when I was raw with all the rough edges. In that spirit; in alignment to being myself, I end this experiment here, until I begin the next one.

#30daysofgratitude #findingreasonstobegrateful #gratitude #igniteyourlight #inspiration #coaching