My 2024 Equity Practices

When the clock struck 12:00 AM on January 1, 2024, little changed from the moment before. Israeli hostages were still being held. Palestinians were still being murdered. Calls of genocide had already begun. Armenians were still fearing for their lives in what was called a cultural genocide; having suffered a physical genocide in 1915. A Congolese genocide was also underway and completely invisible in U.S. news. The war in Ukraine had faded to the background for the U.S., but was still destroying lives. Inside the borders of the United States, the 75 percent majority White population had gone into full panic about losing their power over Black people who make up just under 14 percent of the population. Many White, Christian, heterosexual, men of the United States and the wives and daughters who are subject to them, were not just afraid of Blackness but also of any identity that is different from theirs in any way--gender identity, native language, religion or lack thereof. Furthermore, they were now able to erase the idea of bodily autonomy from the national vocabulary by power of the U.S. Constitution.

[Deep breath]

And then Claudine Gay’s Harvard University presidency came to an end. And then Dr. Antoinette Candia-Bailey died by suicide. And then the Fearless Fund was attacked for providing capital to Black women for their businesses--capital to which they would not otherwise have access.?

[Silent scream]

What can one Black woman committed to racial equity do in the midst of all this? I cannot refuse to pay my taxes because I don’t want to fund genocide. I cannot refuse to vote for a President who is supporting genocide because to do so might contribute to my own people’s destruction. I cannot offer millions of dollars in support of Black women entrepreneurs. I cannot gather all the Black women on the frontlines of this fight into my arms to protect and comfort them. And I can do nothing to shield Black youth from the physical and mental anguish I feel in the air in Memphis, TN.

Three months into 2024, and I've come up with a plan.

Keep your eyes on the prize.

Listen: Eyes on the Prize, Sweet Honey and the Rock

One practice that has always helped me in moments of overwhelm is regaining focus. What exactly am I trying to accomplish or to what vision of the world am I trying to contribute? What is my contribution? And what is my work in this moment--literally the next hour?

When I was working on my comprehensive exams as a doctoral student, I had a 2-week window to write 2 very lengthy papers. My days began with Sweet Honey and the Rock singing “Eyes on the Prize”. The song reappeared throughout the day when I felt stuck. The voices in my head since that time are those women singing and telling me to focus.?

I am one of the few people whose purpose is also the way I make my living. So in this moment, I will focus narrowly on my business, which is the business of guiding leaders to build and maintain racially equitable organizations. It feels so small--insignificant even--in the context of all the madness, but it is what I can do. And I do it well. I see the evidence of how my work makes others’ lives better. That is a prize worth my constant attention.

Remember WHAT the enemy is and WHO the enemy is not.

Evil is the enemy, not the person committing evil acts. This element of nonviolence I first learned from the life of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. is one of the most difficult to grasp. It is challenging to see past the person committing the evil acts to the underlying evil systems. Dr. King identified those systems as racism, economic exploitation (capitalism), and militarism.

What does this mean for my practice? It means that although I can see the faces and know the names of the men who launched attacks against the Fearless Fund and Claudine Gay, my fight isn’t with them. It’s with the civil rights laws and legal system that allow for cynical and cowardly interpretation. It is not with the judges and governing boards who contort laws and misapply academic standards, but with the need for such laws and the mismanaged practice of peer review. My fight is with the mental models that allow a person to both consider Black women inferior and to fear Black women’s obvious intellectual capacity.

This also means that I must remember that all of us pursuing equity have a different call and approach. Others are not necessarily wrong in the way they move, they are simply moving in a way that is right for their purpose.The people on “my team” who hold different positions and play different roles are not my enemy. One’s choice to engage in reform is not lesser than resistance, it is different. Dreaming of an equitable world is just as important as building that world. None of us will be successful without the other. We will all fail if we don’t embrace a diversity of perspective and approaches to our liberation.

Stay genuinely curious.

We don’t always know what we think we know. I’ve had to teach myself to slow down and ask if I have real knowledge or just assumptions based on incomplete information. As a teacher, I found it powerful to say, “I don’t know.” Students respected that. And I’m comfortable not knowing. But I had recently become a little overconfident in what I actually know. Clearly at my age, with my experience, and my credentials, I know a great many things, but all of that knowledge can get in the way of truly knowing other people and properly reading situations.

I am re-committing to conscious incompetence in all its thrilling vastness. I’m entering client organizations with the “I don’t know” mindset and embracing curiosity about the people I meet and the places they have created.

This practice will also help me navigate the broader discourse of the current U.S. moment. Is it possible that I don’t understand why so many people are determined to stand in the way of me being a whole human because of my many intersecting identities? I can hear what people say and see what they do as racist, sexist, homophobic, and generally hateful. That is crystal clear. But is there something else happening that I can’t see? Are there other questions I should be asking?

Know your position. Play your position.

Listen: Play Your Position

I heard Marian Urquilla say during a training session, “You are most powerful when you operate within the boundaries of your role.” Talk about epiphanous! When I use this in my own training and coaching, I use the invisible dog fence as a metaphor. Within that fence, dogs can run wild and free. But when they hit that fence, they know it. It is invisible, but it stings. Likewise, I know what I know. And I know where my expertise ends. It is better for me and for the field in general when I honor that boundary.?

Another benefit of knowing and playing my role is my well-being. My work is hard and heavy enough without taking up someone else’s. The best support I can offer others in the field is to do my part well, celebrate their wins, grieve their losses, and keep moving forward.

When I move you move.

With all due respect to Ludacris, here I am referring to the murmurations of starlings brought to the front of my mind by adrienne maree brown . Science has yet to understand why starlings fly the way they do in vast numbers and beautiful patterns. Theories abound. Murmurations could be to protect the small birds from predators. Maybe they do it to conserve heat and attract others to their roosting place. Murmurations could be the result of energy flow through the group, like particles in physics--one moves, the next 7 move, the seven connected to those move. Regardless of the reason, starlings are in sync. They are safe. They are warm. And they communicate with the slightest twitch of their wings.

If I know where I’m going, can properly identify the dangers, resist jumping to conclusions, and hold true to my role, then I am well positioned to respond with great agility to others who practice as I do. I don’t need to be part of an equity master plan. I just need to be tuned in to my accomplices to see what the next best move may be.

Choose yourself

Listen: Flowers, Miley Cyrus

My work ends when I do. Sure, I have planted seeds and invested in the development of others, but the work that is uniquely mine ends when I die. My choice to take up the pursuit of race equity is dangerous. It is harmful to my health--physical and mental. It can do harm to my financial well-being. Consider all the people who have lost their jobs in early 2024 because of their desire to pursue diversity, equity, and/or inclusion. Resistance to race equity has always been a life and death pursuit. It may seem to have become less risky since the 1960s, but the risk has always been present. Now that those who are willing to do serious harm are emboldened once again to weaponize their power and take up actual weapons, it is more important than ever that I choose myself.?

I am trimming off things that will take energy away from my well-being. My mind, body, marriage, and business--which is the business of equity--are where I will focus. Others may have different priorities, but I hope your mind and body are at the top of your list.