My 2023: Terror, Love & Triumph

Looking back on 2023, the Jewish Proverb, “He that cannot endure the bad, will not live to see the good” sums up my year.

The last three months, as a proud Jew, my heart was shattered by the horrific attacks on Israel. My body felt the ancestral fear that the Jewish people and our homeland are never safe.

But the worst impact was today’s trauma reignited my personal terror of being kidnapped walking out of synagogue 27 years ago in Mexico City.

Thankfully the last two months, I’ve been working with a skilled trauma therapist who helped me process the horror I buried. She taught me skills to reduce and navigate the waves of reliving the anguish. Owning and dancing with my pain has made me even more resilient. Life is too short not to live with passion and courage. I've reffirmed my purpose is to serve Israel and the Jewish people.

Beyond the bad in 2023 there was a lot of good, a lot of love. Another Jewish Proverb says, “Only love gives us the taste of eternity.”

Personally, I found my beloved Sam. He is my rock; kind, loving and we have the shared values of family, Judaism and Israel. After reading together “Your Brain on Love”, we built a strong foundation that’s created a powerful partnership.

The most fierce love I knew in 2023 was for my three sons and the women who love them. Jewish wisdom holds that our children are a gift and loan from G-d and our job is to raise them to leave us. My boys have flown the nest and I could not be prouder.

This year my son Gabriel, the nomad, lived in five countries while working remotely as a digital currency market maker, staying connected to his Jewish roots and artistic gifts. Jonas proposed to his beloved, our angel Katie, got a job to feed his passion for space exploration at the Air & Space Museum and fed his artistic expression in designing their home. Hillel balanced a lot with an amazing girlfriend Sasha, a demanding course load, student government, head of the campus Jewish group, a job at a French bakery, member of the volleyball team and a campus sports broadcaster.

The other man in my life I talked to more than my family is Ryan my business partner at Bernstein. I’m incredibly fortunate to not only work as a wealth advisor at one of the top financial firms globally, but also to work alongside someone of deep integrity, intellect and expertise.

Beyond my family and work, my love extends to my lifetime commitment to serve the community. My personal mission statement I wrote at age 17 is, “To be a catalyst for positive change by educating and inspiring individuals and communities.”

This year I manifested my mission through TEDxSanDiego . My first year as curator, I discovered another platform where powerful transformation happens when you curate extraordinary people, push them to their limits, and deepen their connection to each other through a carefully crafted, personal and transcendent experience.

On a more personal level, weekly I spent one on one time studying Torah (ancient Jewish texts) with Jessica, an attorney and scholar who this year I met in person after three years of learning virtually together. I was matched with Jessica through Partners in Torah , the 30-year global organization that matches any Jew who wants to learn about their heritage with any Jew who wants to teach. I’m proud to serve as President of their Board and guide their growth and impact.

Another special learning relationship this year was I was lucky to mentor Natalie Dahan, a 25 Jewish girl from Dubai, India living in the US pursuing her dreams in science, medicine, technology and entertainment.

Navigating a year of such highs and lows, I am grateful to have a loyal group of incredible friends who were there to be loving witnesses to all that transpired. You know who you are and I love you as ‘my chosen people’, the people I chose to be my family.

To all of you, my extended loving witnesses, I wish you a 2024 with a balance of good and bad. May we know more days of light and laughter than darkness and despair. Find those to cling to and hold them tight. Love is the fuel of a life well lived.

Audrey Jacobs