My #10year challenge

10 years in the industry

  This month marks my 10 year anniversary in the banking and financial services industry. As clichéd as it may sound, this blink of an eye, has not been without its fair share of ups and downs. Through this ever evolving period, the heartbreaks and the highs, of holding on and letting go, there has been one constant companion – “change”. And if there has been one true teacher, it has been “experience”. Most of life, as one famously said, “Is an act of letting go!” So, as I decided to move on from my previous job in BNY Mellon earlier this year, where I had spent 9.5 of these last ten years, I realise this part of letting go is part of the process too. The process of change, the process of evolving.

              In the months after, I have embraced a series of changes on the personal and professional front, all a result of conscious decisions. Decisions which stemmed from refusing to be tied down by the boundaries created by those around me, to get out of my carefully crafted comfort zones and to embrace something I have long believed to be my area of improvement – embracing uncertainty.

               Yet when I moved on from my role at BNYM, a place where I had through sheer hard work and toil, had earned my stripes and forged a strong sense of identity, I was making one of the most frightening transitions of my adult life. Not knowing where my next pay cheque is going to come from – a salaried man’s nightmare. Fast forward a few months, living through the fears & anxiety, through countless rejections ( I actually know the number!), through the excruciating journey of self-discovery, through the unstymied belief to transform and shape my life the way I have always envisioned, there are learnings that stand out – all part of these 10 years. So, if you are in your journey of breaking free or consolidating your life, these could add value to you as well.

1.      There is no replacement to hard work

“A dream doesn’t become reality through magic; it takes sweat, determination and hard work.”

Throughout these last few years, one learning that always stand out for me is that hard-work eats talent for breakfast! I had what most will term a successful stint at my previous organisation – 4 promotions in less than ten years. But these promotions were built on months and years of hard-work, on stretching my yearly goals each year, on learning new things each day and most importantly, consciously trying to add value. The rest follows.

“In the world everyone tells you to be a unicorn, be a work-horse!”

2.      Be a man & woman of your words

“Keep every promise you make and only make promises you can keep.”

During these last ten years, whenever I have failed and looked back at the reason why, most often than not it has been at times I have under delivered on my word. And I have been on the receiving end as well. Empires are not built on shaky foundations of promises not kept, they are built on words being kept. Keeping your word is not a good to have trait, it’s a must-have trait whether you are building a personal or professional relationship. So, when you commit – stay committed all the way.

3.      Network across hierarchies

“The currency of real networking is not being greedy but generosity “

“Your network is your net worth”. A significant part of my learning and growth has been via meeting diverse people through different hierarchies. It is often a notion that you are part of a culture. I suggest that we step back and create the culture that we want. There is also no reason and long-term reward for sycophancy. Real value comes from networking when you collaborate for a cause that doesn’t involve you. So, look to add meaning and value for those around you.

4.      Make genuine friends

“True friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity, before it is entitled to the appellation.” George Washington

I have been a minimalist when it comes to keeping friends close however that’s not necessarily the recipe for everyone. Quality over quantity perhaps though more the merrier too! The point is to have friends who knows about your ambitions, goals and dreams, who cheer you on when you are falling behind and who will have your back when you need them to. Successful careers are rarely built on the back of empty pockets of friendships. It doesn’t matter if they are from your work or outside your work, make an attempt to have genuine friends who won’t sell you out. My mantra, “keep them few, keep them close.”

5.      Rid the Toxic

“Stay away from toxic people. They have a problem for every solution.”

Too many of us don’t realise, the weight of toxicity we carry in our daily lives. Whether it’s the toxic weight of other people’s second hand stress, toxic personal relationships, toxic personal habits or just the toxicity of dealing with back-biting and unnecessary competition and gossip, it sucks the joy out of our lives ever so slowly. It drains us off our energy leaving us disengaged and disillusioned about our goals. Get rid of these toxicity by personal conscious choice. We always have a choice. Do not be afraid to burn bridges where the roads lead you nowhere.

6.      Keep Learning

“There are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure.”

There can be progress without learning. The faster we learn this, the easier it is identify our areas of improvement. It could be at your work, your art, your relationship. It keeps the mind refreshed and working. Increase your learning capacity to decrease your chances of becoming irrelevant.

7.      Get a mentor

“Mentoring is a brain to pick, an ear to listen, and a push in the right direction.”

A lot of people have argued with me that they don’t need a mentor. I don’t correct them. I agree. You don’t need a mentor unless you want to have a flourishing and lasting career. Mentorship is highly talked about and highly unpractised. It’s the thing everyone talks about, believes someone out there is doing it but rarely anyone is practising it. So, go out there and speak to someone who knows more than you and has more experience than you.

8.      Feedback

“Make feedback normal. Not a performance review.”

The thing about feedback is everyone loves to dish it out but no one wants to receive it. However, great careers aren’t forged on unwillingness to listen to your mistakes and areas of concerns. It’s about seeking them out. Also, feedback isn’t all about the negative. A large part of feedback should be focussed on the positive. Don’t be afraid to have an honest chat with your partner, with your manager about what needs work and don’t be ever so afraid to put your expectations and boundaries on the table. That happens through conversation and feedback.

9.      Health

“The foundation of success in life is good health: that is the substratum fortune; it is also the basis of happiness.”

There is a notion out there that stress is a sign of progress. The excuse that health takes a backseat cause of career is perhaps the silliest logic to hide your own laziness. Yes, sometimes it is tough and life gets in the way but your health should always be your number one priority. Even if those around you don’t encourage that. You think well when you are in health, you perform better when your body is feeling good. It’s as simple as that. There are tonnes of research out there proving the relation between good physical health, mental keenness and performance. You just have to take the reins in your own hand. Be ahead of the curve before experience teaches you.

10.  Enjoy your successes

“Enjoy every success of yours like it’s the last one! Work for every one of it like it’s your first.” AM

I went through an empowering mental exercise lately that helped me strip and bare out all the successes I have had in the last decade. And shockingly, my mind had to really think about the successes that were as recent as three year old. I always take pride in my mental agility however not to be able to remember a lot of this has to do with me not celebrating my real successes. Sometimes, we are just too hard on ourselves or those around us. What is the point of success after success if we don’t enjoy and integrate them to our identity? So, step away once in a while and think about the wonderful opportunities that you have created for yourself and the wins that you have had. Momentum about success can create a solid roadmap for future success.

These were my learning, what are yours?

“Everybody is ordinary until you hear their extra-ordinary stories” - AM