My #1 Rule for ADHD and Guilt
Jacob Kountz
Got ADHD? Pay What You Want for my products. (ADHD at Work course coming soon)
Does “I should have done this sooner” ring a bell?
It should. Why?
Because many people with ADHD say this to themselves.
You know exactly what I’m talking about:
The outcome:
Intense guilt-tripping.
I don't blame you for this process. This is the experience with ADHD.
You have a busy mind and it’s hard to get things done outside of that.
It's like having 100s of tabs open on your computer, and you don't know where to start.
Then, out of the blue you get something complete. Yay. (you're shocked)
But even when you get something important done all you do is self-blame:
"I should have done this sooner."
Whether you do something or not, you still lose.
Unfair, right?
The problem with all of this is that you end up not acknowledging you finally sacrificed your time and effort to get that one important thing done.
This undermines periods of victory.
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Then you feel worse than before.
And then you quit...
But you deserve victory.
You deserve to say:
"Yes, I got it done!"
And this is when my #1 rule reminder helps:
Don’t forget to celebrate the steps that lead you to new places.
(Even if those places aren't convincing enough that it's worth it. It will be one day.)
Because without the first step, you never achieve what you really want.
And that's what life with ADHD is about:
One step at a time and noticing the small victories.
It's time to remind yourself that you're allowed to celebrate these moments.
Such as this article you just read was my small victory this week.
Because it's been months since I've released one.
Besides choosing to rain on my own parade, I choose to celebrate this moment.
My hope is for you to celebrate your moments too.
Take care.
Promoting the well-being of all children.
4 个月Jacob, thank you for helping other ADHDers. I often wonder why other ADHD experts don't make the same offer as you. As a 63 year old ADHDer diagnosed nearly 15 years ago after my son was diagnosed (common...right). Yes, knowledge is power, GUILT is overwhelming...Parenting is wrapped in GUILT...not a long jump for someone who has always had GUILT as a constant companion...Parenting kicks GUILT into Hyper-GUILT. My son is now 20 years old and struggles with...? You probably guessed it...yes, he struggles with GUILT. I swore that I was going to become an expert and use my expertise to shield my child from the confidence-eroding, self-doubting, time-robbing companionship of GUILT. I am way behind schedule. I am going to take you up on your kind and generous offer. And please know that the money I pay now will be small. If your products help me, help my son, I will pay more. I am sure it will fall short of being what its worth...tight budget (SSDI). But I do promise to pay it forward.
Got ADHD? Pay What You Want for my products. (ADHD at Work course coming soon)
1 年Pay What You Want resources here for those struggling with ADHD: https://gumroad.com/thriveadhd
Student at California State University, Bakersfield
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I help Senior Leaders with the system to stop working 60+ hour weeks to focus on what they love instead!
1 年Wooo for celebrations I'm celebrating that I made it for an 8am meeting, realised it was rescheduled so reading this instead ??
?? Certified NeuroHealth & NeuroLeadership Coach | Writer | Trainer | On a mission to help sensitive high achievers accomplish more without burning out. Follow me to get brain hacks for hustle-free high performance.
1 年Celebrating with you! I know this struggle all too well. Congratulations on a well-written piece that will help so many people stop ‘shoulding’ all over themselves! ??