Must Be Present to Win

My pounding heart woke me from a deep sleep. Nightmare fears were swirling in a destructive tornado of horrible outcomes. “Michael!” I summoned my best friend who was reading in the next room. “What if someone in my family gets hurt or dies.” At this point all my breathing techniques and mindful tools were hidden behind a solid wall of fear.?

“I’m here.” he said sitting down next to me. “Take a breath. What sounds can you hear right now?” he asked. “Cars going by. Birds chirping. A dog barking.”? Paying attention brought me back to now. “I’m here. You’re here. And right now, all is well.” he added.?

Somehow that snapped me out of the free fall. He was right. Right now, all is well. I can’t control or predict the future. I can’t protect everyone everywhere from the dangers of life. But the best thing I can do for my students, my children, family, friends, and all the people I meet as I go about my day is to be present. Because right now, all is well.?

But what if right now all is not well ? Being present with uncomfortable feelings is the surest way to move through incapacitating thoughts. Being the observer of disturbing thoughts and emotions rather than identifying with them leads to emotional freedom. These emotions will not destroy or define me. These emotions are passing through me. They are not me. I am the observer.

It takes courage. The more I observe feelings of shame or guilt or fear from a place of compassionate love for myself as an imperfect human, the easier it gets. It’s a muscle that grows as I forgive myself for all the many, many past failures, transgressions, and unkind things I did before I knew better.?

I am the observer who keeps learning and growing. I am the brave seeker willing to face myself with empathy. I am the human who will make mistakes till I die.?

Must be present to win the grace of insight and wisdom.