Musings from quarantine: Stay connected

I’m feeling good. I am. Honestly. On the whole. I think. I have so much to be grateful for and I know it. I do a lot of personal development work. It’s all about perspective. I know that.

This is the conversation I’m having with myself today. I haven’t really slept well. I’m human. I’m starting to feel the strain of living and working on different time zones and spending 24/7 with the kids. They’re currently running around naked and asking if it’s movie night yet. It’s still lunchtime. 

I’ve sat down to collect my thoughts after having steadily and happily, I must admit, made my way through a packet of roasted, salted peanuts. They were delicious. I’m having them with a little pick me up glass of Fizz. Not Champagne. A fizz stick, a delightful energy drink packed full of B vitamins and natural sources of caffeine. So far it’s the highpoint of my day. 

I think I’m having “one of those days”. I’m in a bit of a funk. It’s not grey but it’s not bright either. Muggy is the best way to describe it. My head feels equally muggy, like I’m hungover, only I’m not because I rarely drink and certainly not enough to give me a hangover anymore. I’d absolutely love to go for a really, really long walk and to blow away the cobwebs. But alas, I cannot. Lockdown here means taking a short walk adjacent to your home. For me that means a quick walk round the church grounds opposite our flat. I’m actually lucky. It’s a huge space and means the kids can scoot about on their scooters without me worrying they’ll get mowed down by an oncoming car. Where we live there aren’t any pavements. 

Am I having a pity party? Is that what this is? Am I in a funk and feeling sorry for myself? Probably. The thing is I know I’ll be okay. I’ll snap out of it soon. I’ll do jumping jacks if I have to and fist punch the air belting out incantations. It does wonders for my mood. I feel like a total rockstar legend when I do that. You should try it sometime if you’re in a funk. 

What has started to concern me about quarantine, lockdown, social isolation, call it what you may, is that people might start to feel very cut off. I know right now everyone is reaching out to everyone and checking in to see if they are okay, but what about if this continues? Will people still stay connected then? Being virtually connected doesn’t cut it. It’s great as a temporary measure but I miss hugging my friends and family. I know it’s only been a week in. But I’ve been picking up some really weird energy vibes. I don’t even watch the news by the way. I don’t need to. Everyone else watches enough of it for me and fills me on the latest disaster story. Even the jokes going around are a bit too cynical now. They’re all about getting really fat or shooting people for supplies. The latter ones I hate. Are we really going to become like that? I’d like to think not. 

I find writing helps. Even if you aren’t a writer you might like trying to journal. It does help to get your feelings out on paper. Even if you’re just venting, once you’re done you’ll feel heaps better. Screaming into your pillow also works. 

Oof. Everything passes. Everything is for a season. I know that. It’s just today feels strange. I can’t quite put my finger on it. 

Promise yourself you’ll stay connected to people. When you self isolate you can easily become isolated. You can forget to reach out. You almost feel forgotten. I know because I’ve been there. Not now. Many years ago. You’re not really forgotten. You only think you are. But what you think about and focus on grows. It becomes your reality until you’re so disconnected that you don’t quite know how to make your way back. There’s always a way back though. Remember that too. 

There will be people you know, people you work with, people you are related to, people you live next to who are suffering right now and you might not notice. I urge you to please notice. Stop for a minute and just reach out. Smile at the stranger keeping two metres away from you at the supermarket. Pick up the phone and say hello to someone when they pop into your head. Don’t text. Actually pick up the phone and let them hear your voice. Have a conversation. I’m big on voice notes but that’s not the same. Have a genuine conversation. Ask someone: how are you? And really mean it. You could make all the difference to someone’s day. 

I know that we are all responsible for ourselves and our happiness and that ideally when people are struggling they should pick up the phone and call you, but sometime people don’t know to do that. They don’t think. I’m not saying wallow with them. I’m not saying bring yourself down. I just mean reach out, stay connected, stay human. 

The way we are working is changing and everything is moving online. It’s inevitable. It was going that way anyway. But for some people going to work and hanging out with people is the highpoint of their week; the only time they have social interactions. Not everyone has a big loving family to go home to or people who will check in on them. Not everyone has a big group of friends. Yes, we are all responsible for meeting new people and changing things and staying connected. I’m a big believer in personal responsibility. But I’m also a big believer in kindness and not forgetting that there are some people out there who just need to know there’s a friendly voice out there thinking about them. Just a smile at the other end of the line. Let’s try not to forget them. Let’s not forget what it means to be a human being.