Music Lessons

I had a conversation with a colleague today about our backgrounds and whatnot, and when school came up, they asked, "Do you ever feel sad that you're not using your music degrees [at work]?" to which I answered, "Oh, but I am."

This response surprised me as it was rolling off my tongue because it's been asked of me before, but I'd never replied that way. I've usually responded with something like, "Oh sure, sometimes, but I try to keep music a part of my personal life, so it's really not too bad. Besides, if music was my vocation, I'd probably miss the business side. Blah, blah, blah." But something prompted me to answer differently today, and upon reflection, the answer was entirely genuine.

I would say that if I'm anything, I'm exceptionally organized. I am meticulous - I have (a very specific brand/model of) pens that are strictly attributed to, and only used for assigned categories/functions by color... And my spreadsheets, right down to my pivot tables, are all color-coded, which coincidentally, match the color attributions of the pens. I have multiple notebooks that each serve a distinct purpose and I use them exclusively as designated. And yes, all of my notebooks use the established color-coding system. I outline any email/document with 3 or more topics prior to composing it, and I am devastated when I find grammatical/spelling errors in anything I've written (social media very much included). I am late if I'm not 5 minutes early and I feel like a terrible human whenever that circumstance becomes a reality. I bullet-journal in my personal life; I do remember what life was like before that, but I don't like to.

All of this to say that I'm kind of a freak. Thanks, music school. College kids aren't generally known for their thorough planning, exceptional time management skills, or exceedingly responsible behavior - and I was no exception. Until I had to be. And no, I know "growing up" in this way isn't exclusive to music majors, but there are things about studying music at a university that are unique to other disciplines. In very few music classes are there regular assignments or papers (there are some) - the nature of most of my music classes were performance-based, which meant they culminated at the end of a grading period. I had to plan how I was going to put the work in throughout the semester, for just about my entire course load. Every semester, every year. I learned this quickly - or at least within a half a semester... I also learned to accept that at any given time, the classes that took up the majority of my time were the ones that were worth 0-2 credits - then add gym time, competition travel, and team meetings... Talk about learning perspective and prioritization!

Like an idiot (or more accurately, like a clueless young adult), I decided a great time for grad school to commence was two and a half months after the birth of my daughter. Because every new mother could use a diversion, right? Thus began another two glorious years of developing time-management skills and discipline - coincidentally, I'm fairly certain I didn't sleep for two years. I was learning vowel formants and modifications; I was improving my stage technique and how to better communicate my art. And I was tired.

But beyond the tiredness, my perspective was shifting. I was growing. I didn't respond to everything as quickly as I would have in years past - I processed. "Problems" were no longer linear; black and white gave way to gray. I was tired, but I was refueling despite the fatigue.

All of this to say that my "tired" self 20+ years ago taught me how to be the freakishly-organized, particular, self I am now. I use the skills I had to learn many years ago on a daily basis. And believe me, I have a LOT upon which I can improve (just ask any of my colleagues, my husband, or my daughter), but I'm certain I would have never completed my MBA, or owned my business, or parented as successfully (though the jury is still out on that one), had I not learned through, and in spite of fatigue.

I know that I use my "music lessons" every day at work, whether I choose to acknowledge it or not. Today I chose to own it. Thanks, music school(s).