Mr Freeze and Mrs Mute : What type of Video Conference user are you?

Video conferencing has undoubtedly changed the way we do business, collaborate with colleagues, friends, families and generally "meet up" with people.

I have been an avid user of video conferencing for the last two decades. From the very earliest prehistoric formats, with pixelated video and tinny sound to the more modern day equivalents, with high definition visuals, silky user interfaces and mobile and app integration.

However, whilst technology and our use of it has evolved beyond all recognition, general human behaviour has remained reasonably static and occasionally things can go wrong.

I have compiled a list of common characters encountered when using Video Conferencing. Which ones can you relate to the most and how many of these have you encountered?

They are all tongue in cheek and perhaps we all fall into some of these categories, some of the time.

The heavy breather
Every VC has to have a heavy breather. Nothing like trying to explain some complex technical solutions, whilst Darth Vadar hangs on the line.

Mr "Top of my head"
This one is brilliant. I am on a VC, but I am only going to show you the top of my head. No idea why this happens? Do you like my ceiling?

Mrs "Not looking at you"
I am on a VC with you, but because I may be using two computers, I will only show you my side profile. Akin to talking in person to someone who will only stand sideways to you. Very odd!

Mr Invisible
Look, I am not even there, but here is my chair.

Mrs Halo
Lights are switched on so bright that Halos emanate from their head

Mr Shadow
The brother of Mrs Halo. Only a silhouette can be seen, like something out of a Crimewatch reconstruction. 

 Dr "Inappropriate Venueue"
Sorry, I can’t hear or see you very well, because I am attending this VC from a moving train that is currently going through a tunnel under the sea on Mars. Sitting next to me is my rabid dog and opposite are my three hungry children. The good news is that I get to spoil your VC because I can’t find my mute button. Please mind the gap.

 Mrs No Camera
The whole point of video conferencing is that despite sitting on opposite sides of the World, you can still hold a “virtual” face to face meeting. Whilst not as good as an in person discussion, VC does allow you to pick up on facial expressions, body language and other subliminal messages that would be missed on an audio only conference.

Therefore, it always amazes me that every so often you encounter Mrs No Camera. Their assumed smiley face is replaced with a low resolution graphic of a camera. You can hear them, but you can’t see them? What are they up to? Why do they not want to show their face? Occasionally this may be down to a “technical” issue with the camera, but you can’t help wondering what they are up to.

Mr Freeze
Admittedly, we have all done this. You just need a swig of coffee, a quick stretch or a sneaky munch on the sandwich, so quickly freeze your camera. However, we all know and love the “habitual” freezers. Hour long conferences spent in freeze mode. Again, why you have to ask?

Mr "Thought I was on Freeze"
Occasionally Mr Freeze gets caught out. All that button pressing can get quite complicated and thinking you are on freeze, when in fact you are not, can be quite a hazardous occupation. Nose picking, face pulling, yawning are some of the milder behaviours I have seen from this group.

The Joker
One of my earliest VC experiences was with a manager who thought it was funny to zoom the local camera onto inanimate objects in the room and conduct the VC assuming the identity of that objects. Plants, pencils, smiley faces all became VC stars over night. Every so often, you still see the Joker at work in various VCs

Mr Mute
Again, hands up who hasn’t done this. You have just finished a brilliant monologue, only to realise you were on mute the whole time and your inspirational speech went unnoticed.

Mr "Not on Mute"
Perhaps one of my favourites. The person that thinks they are on mute, when in fact they are not. Singing, whistling and general commentary down the phone, unbeknownst to the perpetrator that it can all be heard by everyone on the phone. Best one I have heard yet is by someone on a Global VC involving over 200 people, muttering down the phone that the presenter was “boring them and life is too short to listen to this S**t.”

So, next time you are on a Video Conference, remember people are watching you!

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David Stack is founder of Brightfrog, an IT consultancy business with a twist. David has over 20 years experience in the Pharmaceutical and FMCG industries and uses common sense, great dedication, enthusiasm and a pinch of social psychology to deliver great results. (www.bright-frog.com)